Mr and Mrs Specter: Mother and Infidelity
by Carebearmaxi
Summary: Fourth in my series of Mr. and Mrs. Specter: Harvey and Donna are happily married. However, Harvey thought his mother issues were cured with love, marriage, and fatherhood. However, when his mother unexpectedly appears and Donna starts showing symptoms of infidelity, what will Harvey do? A little bit conflict but a lot of love on the bottom.
1. Chapter 1-Mother and Infidelity

Infidelity and Mother

Donna Paulsen Specter looked at the letter her husband had just handed to her. She did not recognize the looping handwriting. It was late morning at Pearson Specter Litt, and Donna had not opened the letter before handing Harvey's mail to him as the letter was marked "personal" in big printed letters on the lower left hand side of the standard envelope. She began to read the unfamiliar hand and now knew why Harvey had handed her the letter.

"Harvey, this is from your mother," Donna stated shocked beyond belief. It had been a well- known fact that Harvey Specter did not speak to his mother or consider her at all. Donna had never met her mother-in-law, the infamous Lillian Specter; furthermore, she never mentioned her or thought about her either knowing what just her name erupted in her husband. Lillian's offenses to her elder son were numerous but betraying his father had been the worst.

"Yes, I know that! I do not want to see her!"

"She wants to see her grandchildren it says here." Donna said walking toward the couch where Harvey decided to plop after handing Donna the letter. She put the letter down on the end table and laid a comforting hand on Harvey's knee. She loved him so much and she knew how difficult seeing his mother would be after all this time. Lillian Specter laid the first brick of the emotional wall that had held Harvey captive for a very long time until the last five years when realization had hit Harvey that he did not enjoy being void of emotion.

"Harvey, I know how painful this is for you, but you don't think she has a right to see her grandchildren?"

"No, not our children! Whatever arrangement she has made with Marcus and his family that's between her, Marcus, and his family."

"Ok, Harvey," Donna said trying to calm Harvey from pacing up and down his office with his jaw tightly clenched.

"That woman lost her privileges to my life when she cheated on my father, a perfectly good man, who did nothing worse than try to love her."

Donna wanted to discuss this with him a little longer but she looked at her gold watch sitting on her wrist she realized that Harvey's next client was coming for a deposition.

"Harvey, focus. You have a deposition with Mr. Katzenberger."

"That's where I'm going right now… and Donna?" Harvey asked as he started towards the conference room and turning around to eye his wife.

"What?" Donna asked knowing already what Harvey was going to say before he said it.

"This is not something I want to discuss at home either. You got it?" Harvey said with a stern expression which Donna would understand as his final statement on the subject. He knew that once the children were asleep that she would insinuate herself into his thoughts and get him to examine why his heart and mind still had not changed all these years.

Donna saw his stern expression and decided that for now to let sleeping dogs lie. She simply nodded her understanding as Harvey turned and walked determinedly toward the conference room.

Part 2

Later that day Rachel Zane (Harvey's Associate) and Donna were having lunch discussing Rachel's upcoming nuptials with Mike Ross (Harvey's protégé and best bud).

"I know I will have to go for my fitting soon for my gown, but I don't think I took all the baby weight off after having Gordon. Although I know I look fabulous in anything," Donna said trying to be flippant and not worry about Harvey in the back of her mind.

"You look terrific, Donna. I think you must be the only woman I know that has had two babies in two years and jumped right back to her pre-baby weight."

"Well, yes…except the girls here," Donna said pointing to her breasts. "I've gone up two sizes since I decided to breastfeed."

"I bet Harvey doesn't mind they're bigger," Rachel sniggered.

"Rachel! You naughty girl. Is this what you think about when you were working with my husband?" Donna laughingly snorted at the other younger woman really enjoying their "girl" talk. She had missed it.

"No, or course not. However, I know he never takes his eyes off you when you're sitting at your desk."

"All I know is that I am glad I can finally drink something stronger than cranberry juice."

"Well, here is to the upcoming Christmas nuptials of Rachel Zane and Michael Ross," Donna said as she held up her champagne flute. Donna wanted to toast her friend properly because when Mike and Rachel announced their engagement almost a year ago, Donna could not drink alcohol she was recovering from a car accident and in the first few stages of pregnancy with baby Gordon born just about six weeks ago on a warm August morning. He joined his big sister Amanda who had celebrated her first birthday the previous March 11th making her only 18 months older than her baby brother. This was Donna's second week back to the office.

"Thank you. Congratulations to you, too, and Harvey for baby Gordon Jacob Specter," Rachel said.

Donna and Rachel finished their lunch. Rachel was finishing up at Columbia Law School and due to graduate before her wedding in December. The last few years had gone by so quickly that Donna could not believe the change in her life. She was now a mother of two under the age of two and still working with her husband in the daytime. Sometimes Donna felt guilty about not being home with her children as much as she could be. There was really no reason why she had to work as Harvey had said many a time. However, she knew that Harvey still needed her with him at the office. Harvey was a good husband and a good loving father, but he still possessed that little bit of selfishness that said he needed his children's mother more at work than they needed her at home. Somehow they had made it work. However, time would tell if Amanda and Gordon Specter would harbor resentment at their parents' decision. Besides Donna had decided that motherhood was wonderful, but it was much harder than coming to the office every day and providing for each whim of her children's father in her capacity as secretary. After all, as perceptive as Donna was about everyone and every situation, she could feel Harvey's relief at her being back at the office. He had always told her that "I can't be me without you."

Rachel had ridden back to Columbia for the last part of her day since she had her morning hours spent at the firm. Donna had walked back to the office before Harvey was to have returned from his appointment with Berger & Associates a new firm he had signed only a couple of days ago. Their products varied from baby powder to motor oil. The conglomerate had many subsidiaries, and Harvey had signed the entire entity for Pearson Specter Litt as their retained legal representation.

Donna arrived at her desk and found the voicemail message blinking. She hoped it was not her mother who had offered to take care of the babies until Gordon was a few months old. Roberta Paulsen did not trust the daycare centers as far as she could throw them, so as she did when Amanda was a few months old, she did the same with little Gordon. Donna retrieved the handset and heard a voice that was unfamiliar. Donna wrote down the information and staring into blank space put down the receiver.

"Hey, Donna," Mike Ross had said as he had come to her desk. "Donna?"

"Oh, Mike," Donna said taking a breath finally.

"Whoa, sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. You were a million miles away. Something wrong?" Mike asked his best friend's wife.

Donna suddenly had a panicky look on her face as she asked, "Where's Harvey?"

"He should have been right behind me, but he stopped in the lobby to talk to some woman."

"Did Harvey know her?" Donna asked rising from her chair.

"Yes, he did…What's going on? Donna wait!" Mike exclaimed as Donna hurried from her seat to the bank of elevators around the corner.

Mike shook his head and then left the folder on Donna's desk as Harvey had asked him. He then went back to his office on the other side of the floor.


	2. Chapter 2 - Lillian

Chapter 3

As Donna approached Harvey and the woman in the lobby of the building housing Pearson Specter Litt, she heard the confrontation before noticing Harvey's mother. Donna had no clue what her mother-in-law looked like as their apartment or their house in West Chester had never contained pictures of her. There were other portraits, of course, of other relatives and even their friends but no images of Harvey's mother. Harvey had completely shut her out a long time ago and he was not relenting no matter what the circumstance.

"Harvey!" Donna shouted to calm the two flaring tempers gathering spectators in the lobby.

"Donna, not now!" Harvey shouted back.

"Is this your wife, Harvey?" Lillian Specter stopped shouting long enough to notice the tall striking red head who had called her son's name with such vehemence.

"None of your business, mother. It is best you leave now. Do not come back or try to contact me ever again! When I said I never wanted to see you again, I meant no matter what!" Harvey began to walk away leaving the older woman in tears.

"Donna, come on. Back to work…now!" Harvey shouted.

"In a minute, Harvey," Donna said to her husband/boss.

Harvey did not want to make a scene with Donna now as well so he just clenched his jaw and stomped away to the elevator. As he punched the button his glare told Donna that meant she had better not bring up the subject once they were upstairs in the offices.

Part 2

As Donna looked at her mother-in-law she now knew where Harvey had inherited those deep dark brown eyes. They were the same eyes that their daughter had inherited as well. Upon inspection, Lillian Specter was still a beautiful woman in her early 60's. She had been 22 when she had given birth to Harvey and 28 when he gave birth to Marcus. Marcus favored Gordon Specter more than Harvey and, perhaps, that was part of the reason why Harvey had not wanted to acknowledge his mother because he saw her when he looked in the mirror.

Lillian Specter was a tall woman. She had flats on and she was almost as tall as Donna who was wearing four inch heels. They were able to look each other in the eye.

"Hi Donna. Yes, I'm Lillian Specter. Harvey's mom. It is so good to meet you in person. I know from Marcus that you were always special in Harvey's heart. "

"Ah, Mrs. Specter, I want to apologize for not meeting you in the lobby before Harvey arrived back. I was at lunch. It's only my second week back from maternity leave. I wanted to take you up to Harvey's office, but I know from experience that it would not be a good idea just now."

Lillian Specter took Donna's hand and dragged her to a sitting position on the bench just inside the glass of the building.

"I didn't expect a warm welcome. I know too well how Harvey feels about me. I know what I've done and I don't apologize for it. I think Harvey is too much like me for his own good," Lillian said smiling proudly.

After hearing that there was no regret for her past behavior, Donna thought that maybe she was right. Harvey was not one who regretted much but since they had married his rough edges had been softened. Donna knew that the walls Harvey had erected so many years ago had just needed the right impetus to fall down. Luckily, Donna and then Mike had been those keys.

"Mrs. Specter, where are you staying?" Donna asked.

"Oh, Mrs. Specter! Call me Lillian or if you feel comfortable enough you can call me mother Specter," Lillian had told her daughter-in-law.

"Oh, I couldn't call someone so young looking as you Mother Specter. I would think I was talking to a nun. Harvey calls my mother mom, so I feel I can call you mom in return. Is that ok?"

"Wonderful. Now I will leave. My hotel is just a few blocks away. I'll take a cab."

Donna thought that it was silly for her to walk many blocks away although Lillian seemed fit. Donna took her cell phone out of the pocket of her beige A-line skirt and dialed Ray.

"Harvey's going to kill me if he knows I am doing this, but I am going to do it anyway. I would feel horribly guilty if something happened to my mother-in-law on my watch when I know I can help."

Lillian, laying a restraining hand on Donna's other arm, shook her head and insisted that she was perfectly capable of getting a cab on her own or walking the blocks to her hotel.

"Nonsense. Ray? It's Donna. Can you pick up someone for me at the firm? Five minutes. Great. I'll be waiting with her. No, Harvey's not going to need you until about five. We're going home early tonight. Thank you."

About five minutes after Donna hung up her cell, a long black Lexus pulled up outside the building. Donna accompanied Lillian outside in the warm October sunshine and introduced Harvey's mother to Ray, their driver. They exchanged pleasantries for a little bit and Harvey's mother gave Ray the address of her hotel. Donna had texted Ray a few minutes later to not mention a thing about this to Harvey later when they were both in the car. She had fully intended to tackle Harvey herself later.

_ After making sure that her mother-in-law was being safely transported by Ray to her hotel, Donna tackled the next step and took the elevator up to the 50th floor. When she arrived there, she gave Harvey a look and sat back at her desk and resumed the work she had started before her lunch with Rachel. The file that Mike had laid on her desk had some important instructions clipped to the cover, so Donna started working on that immediately as it had to be on Harvey's desk by the end of the work day. Donna was still as efficient in her job as Harvey's assistant during the day, but sometimes at night as his wife things could get a little more hazy.

"Donna," Harvey said into the intercom.

"Yes," Donna said as she continued typing.

"Come in here, please," he stated quietly.

"Harvey, this brief is not brief, if I am going to get it done before we go home…." Donna protested trying to stem off the conversation she knew was they were going to have.

"Donna, please. I need to talk with you," Harvey asked again quietly.

"Sure."

Donna rose from her seat and walked into Harvey's office. She closed the clear glass door as to give them some privacy from prying ears.

Harvey rose from his desk and led Donna over to the couch across the room. He sat down with her and put his head in his hands.

"Look, I am sorry you had to witness what that woman's presence does to me. If you had not come along I was afraid what might have happened," Harvey said taking Donna's hand in his.

"What do you mean what you were "afraid of what might have happened"? Donna asked puzzled. Then she looked up into Harvey's face as it rose to stare her in the eye.

"You don't mean that you would have physically taken your temper out on her, do you? She's a woman and what's more your mother. She gave birth to you. Do you think it would be ok if one of our children wanted to hit me for something that I did which may have hurt their environment but not them directly?"

"That's not the point. You would not cheat on me and let Gordon or Amanda keep it a secret and allow me to maintain an outward happy nonchalance about it. You're not that type of person. We're not that type of people, Donna. I may have hit her, and I know that wouldn't be right. However, you have to know that the relationship between she and I must stay as it is because of my reaction."

"You might think you would do that to her, but you wouldn't, Harvey. I know you too well. I know you are capable of beating people up whom you think deserve it, but I know you would not beat up your own mother. You are not a woman beater. You know how women should be valued even if they hurt you so deep you don't think you'll recover. You abhor any type of abuse on women or children that's what makes you a decent man. So I think it is time to reexamine your relationship with your mother." Donna said as she kissed Harvey's lips lightly and then caressed his cheek and walked back to her desk to finish her secretarial work which, her boss, Harvey had laid in front of her.

When she arrived back at her desk, the voicemail message was blinking again. Donna retrieved the message and when Harvey had left his office to tell her he was seeing Jessica on a corporate matter she returned the call to her mother-in-law.

"Hi Lillian?"

"Is this Donna?"

"Yes, it is. I assume you got back to your hotel in good condition."

"Yes, I did. Ray was such a nice man. He spoke of you and Harvey very highly. He's been employed by my son for a long time now, hasn't he?"

"Yes, a long time. The exact amount of years escapes me. Now what can I do for you?"

"I wanted to talk to you and Harvey about an issue but I can see that Harvey is still holding a grudge for my behavior to his father those many years ago."

"Is there anything I can help you with directly?"

"Yes do you know the name of a local neurologist?"

"Neurologist? Why do you need one of those?" Donna asked and she automatically panicked.

"I don't want to go into that right now, but do you know of one?"

"Ah…sure, our firm reps some very good medical professionals. Let me see what one is close to you here in Manhattan."

Donna tried to remain calm as her fingers flew through the keyboard looking for the directory of Harvey's clients. She knew he represented a couple of laboratories with medical centers attached to them. One of them had been manufacturing the drug for Gillis industries as well as Jessica's ex-husband's firm. Her eyes finally alighted on one Dr. Jeff Tulane a neurologist with New York Hospital and various other affiliations.

"Lillian, here you go. Dr. Jeff Tulane , 508-914-6590. That is his office's number. Harvey represents his medical arts firm."

"This isn't going to get back to Harvey, is it?" Lillian asked. "I don't want him to know anything yet."

"Lillian, a relationship with a doctor is like with a lawyer. It is strictly client/doctor confidential. With the new HIPPA laws it is even more secure. So no one will tell Harvey anything until you want him to hear it. Please keep me abreast of what's going on, ok?"

Donna spotted Harvey walking back to his office and hurriedly hung up the phone with his mother. Unfortunately, Harvey could read her face a mile away, so he knew she was keeping something from him which did not help his mood any.

"Donna, who were you talking to?" Harvey asked as he leaned on her cubicle with his hands folded in front of him.

"No one. Just one of your clients confirming an appointment I made earlier with them." Donna could not bring her eyes to her husband's face. When she did she slightly bit her lip to which Harvey answered.

"You're biting your lip. You were talking to my mother, weren't you?" Harvey asked but did not stay around for Donna's answer. He simply walked back into his office and twirling his wedding ring on his finger resumed his seat at his desk in front of his laptop.


	3. Chapter 3 - The Elephant In The Room

**Author's Note: Thank you so much for your reviews and sparking a discussion (Evincis). This chapter may seem a little too problematic after having a baby**

 **but I like to write when it comes to some little nagging problems that women face. So I hope I don't offend anyone because I just like to write like that. Thank you again and keep it coming.**

Chapter 4 – The Elephant in the Room

Two days later, Donna stood in front of the full length mirror gazing at herself in the glass wearing the dark teal green gown that Rachel had chosen for her to wear as matron of honor for her wedding in December. When she originally went shopping for this dress, Donna was four months' pregnant with baby Gordon. So she was pleasantly surprised when the seamstress had to take in the waist and let it out at the bust.

"Mrs. Specter, your breasts are very large."

"Well, that's what happens when you breastfeed. Do you have any children, Letitia?" Donna asked knowing that her girls looked great in that gown. Now if only she could stop leaking milk. She expressed as much as she did while she worked, but she could not take up all the time in the special portion of the ladies lounge specifically made for young mothers or mothers-to-be. The room had been built from a proposal written by Donna herself and seconded by many other expectant mothers in the firm. It did not hurt that you were married to one of the name partners. It was a room very much appreciated by not only Donna but those other young women who proposed it. The idea for the room stemmed from fact that a bathroom is an inappropriate and bacteria filled place to express milk and the kitchens were extremely public; and no one wanted to offend coworkers let alone attract gaping viewers.

"No, I don't. Not yet anyway. However, Mrs. Specter, you are definitely going to need some type of support unless you wear this wrap. I can only sew so much support into this gown," the young seamstress said of the strapless sweetheart neckline chiffon gown. It was beautiful and Donna looked gorgeous in it with her long flowing red tresses. The gown had the sweetheart neckline like Donna's wedding gown had had but this had an empire waist with a rhinestone, ruby, and emerald belt and other assorted bling that Rachel knew Donna loved. It would not outshine the bride, but it sure would make people sit up and take notice of the matron-of-honor.

"Donna, are you almost finished?" Harvey asked from the outer room. He did not know why he had agreed to come on this trip instead of staying home with the kids. He supposed it was that Donna wanted his approval before she gave her approval to any or all necessary alterations. After all, Harvey was Best Man and she wanted to make sure that they both looked their usual fabulous selves. He also knew that she wanted to talk to him about his mother whom he assumed had gone back to her whereabouts before she had surprised them with a visit the other day. He knew Donna was bugged about something. Anyway, his eyes lit up as his wife ventured out to show him what she looked like in the gown and she smiled as she gazed on her husband and their children.

"Mandy, honey, please put that down. Well, thank you," Harvey said as he accepted the white satin shoe that his eighteen-month-old daughter handed him. He held Gordon in his arms and adjusted the pacifier as he had spit it out.

"Daddy, book," Amanda Specter said as she handed her father the shoe catalog. She pointed at different shoes and he said how pretty they would look on his little princess. She had kicked off her shoes and Harvey tickled her little socked feet.

Donna was almost loathe to break up this little domestic scene thinking how some people's opinions would change of Harvey if they could see him surrounded by his children.

"Ahem," Donna said catching Harvey's attention. When he looked at her he smiled wide.

"You are hot," he said quietly and breathlessly. Seeing his wife like that took his breath away.

"You don't think I look too over-the-top in this, do you? " Donna asked as Harvey came closer carrying Gordon in his one arm while Amanda continued to sit in the chair and page through the catalog.

"Yes, you do. That's why I like it," he said as he boldly kissed the crease between her pushed up breasts.

"Harvey," Donna protested quietly.

"What? No one's around."

"Well, last time you closed me like that, we had that little settlement lying in your arms."

"All the more fun," Harvey smirked and kissed Donna on the lips.

"The seamstress is trying to find a way for me not to fall out of this gown and then, I think, Mr. Specter we can get some lunch."

Harvey kissed her again this time he let his lips linger. His mouth opened with play and promises of later in the day. As Harvey walked away for the seamstress to finish up, he bounced little Gordon in his arms has he started to wail, kissed him gently, then resumed his seat helping Amanda play dress up.

"What about straps?" Donna asked the seamstress as she came back with a wrap and a brooch to pin it.

Letitia stood for a minute and examined the gown. She pulled a piece of extra fabric from the floor because the gown believe it or not had to be hemmed about an inch. Donna was five foot seven so the extra length in the gown seemed preposterous. However, Leititia pinned the straps to either side of the gown and tugged and realized that might do the trick.

"I think that will work. Good thinking Mrs. Specter. I will make the markings and sew them in. It'll take about a week so you can make a new appointment with the receptionist."

"Thank you. Harvey, sit tight I'll be out in a minute."

_ Finally, they were in the restaurant. Used to wining and dining clients, Harvey had to lower his expectations when he started to dine with his children. Amanda was in a high chair and Donna had Gordon on her lap. She had packed a bottle and her portable warmer which she had warmed in the car on the way over from the seamstress' shop. Harvey's other motive in accompanying her on this October day was that they had not spent much family time together since Donna had returned to the office.

When she had been on maternity leave, he would leave around 6:00 pm (early for him) to be sure he could play with Amanda or bathe her and kiss her goodnight. He would then be available to give Gordon a bottle, if available, and kiss him goodnight. Then he would pull out his briefcase and Donna would bring him a strong cup of coffee and they would work until either Gordon needed feeding or they both were too exhausted to do anything but crawl into bed.

Donna could not wait any longer. She kissed her little's son's turned up nose and looked into his big dark blue eyes-almost brown eyes and placed him back in his seat and laid a restraining hand on him. She had not spoken to Lillian Specter since she had given her the number of the neurosurgeon. She knew Harvey had not spoken to her because he had been in a good mood, and obviously where his mother was involved Harvey's good mood soon evaporated. However, Donna was worried and she was having an awfully hard time keeping her concerns to herself. She never had to be dishonest with Harvey except when it was to protect him. Now she was not sure who or what she was protecting by not being honest with him.

"Well, Donna, I'm going to have me an old fashioned cheeseburger deluxe. I earned it."

"I'm just going to have a salad. I have to make sure they don't have to take the waist back out in that dress for the next two months."

"Speaking of that dress, mmhmmm, I'm almost afraid to let you be matron-of-honor," Harvey said smiling at her.

"Oh, please, I don't have to look that good to get offers. I have to fend them off at the office in nothing but my Victoria Beckham dress," Donna said to see what Harvey's reaction would be.

"Yeah, well, if I ever catch one of them, they are going out the door or window without benefit of an elevator," Harvey said smiling.

"I still got it…" Donna said almost to herself.

The waiter came and took their order. He brought a tiny milk jug for Mandy and the two adults enjoyed a couple of cokes.

"Harvey, I need to tell you something."

"So, tell me," Harvey said as he bit into his burger and wiped some of the ketchup away from his lips.

"Have you seen or heard from your mother?" Donna said as she took a forkful of her salad. She watched Amanda eat her hot dog pieces while she chewed and waited for an answer from Harvey.

"No. Should I have?"

"No. I just thought that perhaps Lillian would have said something to you or attempted to get in touch with you." Donna eyed him as his gaze seemed to encounter the huge cheeseburger he was eating.

"No…did you do something, Donna?" Harvey started to whine. He got whiny when he thought someone was doing something to him, against him, or whatever.

Donna recognized that tone. She heard it often enough in all the years they worked together.

"Not exactly," Donna said keeping her eyes down and then smiling at Gordon.

"What did you do?" Harvey whined again. This time he wiped his mouth with his napkin and pretended to attend to Amanda while he waited impatiently for what his wife's latest escapade had entailed.

When it looked like she was not going to spill the beans, Harvey folded both his hands in front of himself on the table between them and stared hard into her Donna's gentle hazel eyes.

"What are you not telling me?"

"Well, the other day, I had Ray drive your mother to her hotel…"

"You did what?"

"…..then she called me and asked for a good neurologist's phone number." Donna stopped abruptly and started to clean up Amanda who seemed not to be hungry anymore as she wanted to throw a piece of her hot dog across the room. "No,no…" she admonished Amanda awaiting her husband's outrage.

"A neurologist?" Harvey had asked almost calmly and maybe tinged with a little bit of alarm.

"Yes, a neurologist. I asked her why, but she insisted that I don't tell you. This is your mother, Harvey. I know she hurt you, but I told her she ought to let you know if there was a health problem. She just hedged, said thank you, and hung up the phone." Donna finished wiping Amanda's hands.

"I have to admit for the most part I don't care, but at the same time I wonder why Marcus hadn't said anything. I'm sure he knows if something is wrong with mother."

"She probably swore him to secrecy as well, but he's too much of a pussy to tell you what you need to know."

"Marcus is not a pussy," Harvey said looking Donna straight in the eye. He loved his younger brother although he only saw Marcus and his family maybe twice a year at best.

"Ok, he's not. But you know your little brother, he doesn't think his mother hurt him so directly so he doesn't hold a grudge for your mother's imperfections like you do. However, he knows you do and he doesn't like to be told that he's wrong. Something that runs in both Specter brothers, if you ask me."

"Are you done now?" Harvey asked between clenching teeth. "Because I really need to go home and do some work."

"Yes, I'm finished, but Harvey I really think you need to find out about your mother first" Donna said as she strapped baby Gordon into his carry seat while Harvey attended to put Amanda's jacket on.

"That's what I said. I am calling Marcus when I get home."

"Good because I left a voice mail on his phone. He'll be expecting your call in about 30 minutes."

Harvey smirked and then smiled. "This is why I married you. You always know what I need to do before I do."

"Why do you think your name is on the wall at the firm?"

Harvey just smiled and lifted Amanda out from the high chair.

When they arrived home at the house in West Chester, Harvey looked at his watch as he carried his daughter who had fallen asleep during the ride into her Disney Princess decorated bedroom and put her gently on the bed. He removed her jacket and shoes and placed a blanket over her. Making sure her restraint was tight against the bed, so she would not fall out, he kissed her on the forehead and smiled. It was amazing how much she resembled Donna although she had Harvey's big brown eyes. She was very perceptive just like her mother, too, and sometimes Harvey would be caught off guard at the things that would come out of her mouth.

As he came out of Amanda's room he crossed paths with his wife who was cleaning their son who apparently had spit up all over his little overalls and had a wet diaper besides.

"Too bad we couldn't get them both to sleep for a little bit," Harvey said as he followed Donna into the nursery.

"Didn't I tell you that your brother is expecting you to call?" Donna said offhandedly. Secretly she wanted nothing more than to lay on the couch with Harvey and just vegetate.

"Well, about that, I don't think I will be calling him," Harvey said as he kissed Donna's ear.

"Well, about that, Mr. Specter, you should. He may help tell you why your mother insisted on a neurologist the other day."

Harvey walked away and said in a raised whisper, "I don't care what my mother wanted with a neurologist. For all I know she decided to be an MD groupie instead of following musicians around."

Donna smiled and smothered a laugh. The woman she met could hardly be called a "groupie" now. She was sophisticatedly dressed in a Pravda suit with her long blonde hair coiffed so a single piece would not fall out. Donna's imagination could hardly draw comparison with a hippie type woman smoking a joint and painting graffiti peace signs outside of jazz clubs. Wherever she had landed after leaving Harvey's father was unfathomable.

"Come on, Harvey, aren't you the least bit curious?"

"No," he answered emphatically.

Donna looked at her watch as she finished baby Gordon. He was still a little sleepy after his last feeding so she quietly put him in his bassinet and took the baby monitor with her has she and Harvey departed the nursery.

Harvey walked back to the den and picked up the phone. Normally not a landline type of guy but his cell was in the charger and Donna's…well who knows where Donna's phone was. It was like her diary. Only she knew what it contained and where she secretly hid it.

Suddenly, a young boy's voice was on the other end of the line,

"Hello, Specter house," the little five-year-old voice of Harvey's nephew answered.

"Markie? It's Uncle Harvey. How you doing, big guy?"

"Hi, Uncle Harvey. I'm good. I guess you want to talk to daddy?"

"Well, sure, if I can, but I'm always happy to talk with you. Your pee wee team's in the playoffs I hear?" Harvey said recounting the last conversation he had with his brother earlier in the month when Marcus was seeking some free legal advice for a financial client.

"Yep. Are you coming to one of my games?" Marcus Specter, Jr. was a favorite with Uncle Harvey and Aunt Donna. They had started to come to his baseball games last year when he started T-ball and now that he was in football they definitely were not going to miss them until their children were old enough to participate in extracurricular activities.

"Wouldn't miss it buddy. Can you get your dad for me?" Harvey said smiling. He loved talking to his nephew. He reminded him of his younger brother from long ago days when they were both at home and too young to know or care who or what their mother was.

"Hey big bro…Donna said you were going to call me. What can I do for you?"

"Did Donna tell you why I would be calling?"

"No. She just said and I quote "Harvey is going to call you after 3:00 pm. You know as efficient a wife as a secretary."

"Yes, that's my wife and my secretary. Discretion at all costs. Anyway, I wanted you to know that mother paid me a visit at the office the other day. She tried to get by me, but I encountered her in the lobby of the building and told her I never wanted to see her again."

"Wasn't that a little harsh? Don't you think it's about time you work out your grievances?

I mean, Harvey, what she did, she did against dad not you, logically, speaking."

"No, she made me keep secrets from dad until I could not any longer. You know her infidelities aren't all I have against her."

"Harvey, that was a long time ago. She's never been that way with anyone except you."

"Marcus, she beat me for seeing things I should never have seen and threatened me on more than one occasion that she would be sure to make dad see things her way. I lived with that fear until I was 16 years old when I realized that she didn't have that kind of power with dad."

"What can I say, Harvey? What does Donna say?" Marcus sighed on the other end of the phone. He was tired of being between his brother and their mother. When dad was alive it was a little different. He understood the problem, but Dad could curb Harvey's temper and outrage at his own vulnerability and penchant for being abusive in return to their mother.

Listening to his brother on the other end of the line, Harvey felt all the humiliation for both he and his father. Harvey had never wanted to feel that way again. It was not until he started to see the outside world that he realized that just sometimes it was okay to feel. That's why it took him so long to settle and why it took someone as strong as hurt as himself to know that it was okay to be loved.

"Donna thinks we should reconcile our differences. Especially now," Harvey remarked.

"Why is that?"

"When mom called the other day she asked Donna for a good neurologist. She wouldn't tell Donna why she just said thank you and hung up. Do you know anything about that?" Harvey wondered as he inquired of his brother.

There was a long silence on the other end. Just when Harvey was about to coerce Marcus into talking again, Marcus opened his mouth.

"She didn't want you to know. She was afraid that you would feel sorry for her rather than want to mend things with her out of the kindness of your heart."

Harvey started to panic. He was hoping that his brother was not about to say what he knew he was going to say.

"Harvey, mom is dying. She has a brain cancer. She has been to numerous surgeons and doctors and some offer hope and some don't."

"Why didn't she put that in her letter to me or tell Donna that she had a problem?"

"Because she knew that two things would happen: either you would take over and feel sorry for her and take care of her out of pity. Or you would just write her off as dead. "

Donna came to the door of the den at that moment and signaled that there was a call on his cell.

Harvey smirked at the phone. As he spotted Donna, he told his brother goodbye and that he would think about what he was going to do about their mother.

Harvey hung up his phone and walked over to the door. The den was spacious but it was a short walk to the door from where his desk was situated.

"It's Dr. Jeffrey Tulane. He says your mother is in the hospital," Donna said as she handed him his cell. She sniffed as she walked away allowing Harvey some privacy. She returned to Amanda's room where the little girl was getting up from her nap. Donna kept an ear out for Harvey's conversation. _Too bad we don't have an intercom in the house,_ Donna thought to herself. She had never missed too many personal conversations in the office because of the intercom. He did not usually mind, but when Harvey really did not want her to hear he simply hit the off switch. However, since they had become husband and wife, Harvey did that a lot less often. As Harvey had remarked to Marcus, Donna was the soul of discretion.

Suddenly, Harvey hurried into Amanda's bedroom. Amanda seeing her daddy immediately walked up to him to be picked up. As he picked her up and kissed her on the nose, he said to Donna:

"I'm going into the city. Mom has been admitted. Dr. Tulane says he thinks I should be there."

"What about Marcus?"

"Well, she's asking for me," Harvey said with difficulty. He really thought his brother should be with him if this was it for their mother but the doctor did not seem to indicate that she was on her deathbed only that she kept asking to see her son Harvey Specter.

After telling Donna the doctor did not indicate it was near Lillian Specter's end, he made sure that Donna be on standby to call Marcus if things were to develop. Harvey would have Ray pick him up at the airport if necessary. From Boston to Manhattan was an hour's flight so he could be here in a hurry if necessary. Also Harvey could call in some favors with clients with leer jets in case the regular airlines were not fast enough. Donna had all the numbers in her phone, in her computer, and at the office, so he knew he could depend on her-as always.

"I'm taking the Aston Martin," said Harvey handing Amanda back to his wife and kissing them both goodbye.

"Don't have an accident, Harvey. I don't need to lug two babies to see their father," Donna said worried for Harvey's state of mind. She knew he was feeling torn. She knew he was a good driver, a fast driver, but a good driver just the same. _God keep him safe, and God help his mother_ Donna thought as she watched Harvey drive away.


	4. Chapter 4 - Conditions

CHAPTER 5

Harvey made it to New York Hospital in one piece saving his wife worry.

"Donna, honey, I made it here." Harvey said to her voicemail as he got out of his car. He thought she was probably busy with one or both the children.

Harvey entered the hospital and asked for Dr. Tulane. The office was on the fifth floor. Harvey thanked the receptionist, walked the short distance to the bank of elevators and entering the car alone hit the button for floor #5.

Harvey looked both sides as he disembarked from the car at the fifth floor. The directory straight ahead of him directed him to his left. He found himself in a small office with bare walls and one desk in front of him with a man around Harvey's age.

"Dr. Tulane?" Harvey asked.

"Harvey Specter?" Dr. Jeff Tulane asked in response.

"Yes," Harvey responded and shook the man's hand.

"I apologize for tightness of my office, but I'm new and I haven't much time to organize my stuff. Please sit down and we can discuss your mother's condition."

Even though he was sitting in the doctor's office, Harvey felt like this moment was surreal. He was actually going to talk about his mother. This woman he had not seen for upwards of twenty years until the other day when she walked into his life and thought that he would have forgiven her for all the years of deception and cruelty to him and especially to his father.

"Now I know this might be difficult to hear, Mr. Specter, but your mother is dying. Now I know from my conversations with her that you and she are not on the best of terms. She would like to make amends with you before her time is up."

Harvey's jaw clenched. How could he believe this doctor? How could he know that she did not put him up to this just to gain his sympathy and access to his children? He knew that's what she wanted most of all-to see his children and drive a wedge between him and his wife. Donna was already on her side it seemed to Harvey just by allowing Ray to drive her to her hotel and finding a doctor for her from a firm Pearson Specter Litt represented.

"Please allow for my skepticism here, doctor. How and why is she so sick all of a sudden? I never knew that woman to be sick a day in her life. I don't know how much of her past she brought up to you or the reason for our feud, but let me just say that the last thing that I thought would kill her would be a brain tumor."

"Please, Mr. Specter, she is your mother. No, I don't know the extent of your feud with her, but I think it is time to make amends for it."

Harvey shook his head. He was not a cold hearted man, but where his mother was concerned and how much she took from him and his father made it hard for him to show any sympathy or warmth for her.

"Why didn't she call for my brother, Marcus. He knows of her condition and there is no long standing feud between her and him. Why drag me into it?"

"I can only repeat what she said to me. She wanted to make up for all the wrong between you and she and see your children and meet your wife before she dies. I do not think that is too much to ask for in light of her condition."

"Which is?" Harvey said wanting to stop beating around the bush and get to the point.

"She has a brain tumor in the frontal lobe. Her doctor in Rhode Island has been treating it with drugs and radiation. It has helped a little, but she is losing some of her faculties and her physical mobility." Dr. Tulane told Harvey as he dug out his mother's chart from the bottom of his desk.

"I don't know. My mother is a good liar from long time ago. Did you rerun these tests to be sure that she is telling the truth."

"Mr. Specter! I know that in your profession the truth can be a fleeting thing, but in the medical field I know evidence of a brain tumor without seeing the test results confirming them."

"Well, in my profession, I need evidence before I convict or go for the jugular, so pardon me for being a typical lawyer."

"Mr. Specter, please!"

"I'm sorry, Dr. Tulane. I have a lifetime of memories of how bad this woman treated me and my father. The fact that she is dying just seems kind of strange to me. Can I go see her now?"

"Not if you are going to upset her again. She needs to be calm."

"Ok. I will not upset her. I will talk to her civilly."

"That's all she asks."

Harvey walked out of the office letting the doctor lead the way to her room.

 _Many years ago..._

 _"Mom, mom," Harvey Specter, 16 years old, called from the bottom of the staircase. "I'm calling 911. Marcus got hurt in the middle of the street."_

 _Harvey still heard no response from his mother. He had just pulled up in his used 1983 Ford Taurus fresh from school. He no sooner pulled up in the driveway of the house when he heard a car swerve and crash and then screaming from the kids in the middle of the neighborhood street calling Marcus' name._

 _Harvey turned around to see why his brother's name was being yelled from the middle of the street. He ran to see his beloved 10 year old brother lying unconscious in the middle of the street._

 _"Marcus, come on, brother," Harvey panicked and sturdily slapped his brother's cheek hoping to elicit a response from him. He finally picked him up and ran to the house with him in his arms. He laid Marcus on the couch in the living room, ran to the foyer where the phone was and began dialing and screaming for his mother simultaneously waiting for a response from his brother._

 _While waiting for his mother to descend the staircase, he managed to calmly give the necessary information to the 911 operator. After hanging up, Harvey went back to see if his brother had regained consciousness. He was still out cold. Harvey knew he should not have moved him until an ambulance came but he panicked._

 _The ambulance arrived and there was still no response from his mother. He knew she was there because her car was still in the driveway. He was not allowed to ride in the ambulance with Marcus as he was not a parent, however, he made some excuse that his mother was at work and their father was out of town. So he followed the ambulance to the hospital._

 _When Harvey arrived at the hospital, Marcus had awakened and had no recollection of what had happened to him. He panicked and called for his mother, but Harvey took over (as he normally did) and comforted the child._

 _"Harvey, where's mom?"_

 _"I don't know, Marcus. I'm glad you're back. Now the doctor's want you to stay here overnight because it seems you have a concussion and your leg is broken. So I have to find mom and call dad so they can sign the papers."_

 _The little blonde boy with the big blue eyes (unlike Harvey's deep brown ones) looked up to his brother in hero worship._

 _"You're coming back, right, Harvey?"_

 _"Try to keep me away"._

Present day...

Harvey walked into his mother's hospital room to find her lying in bed with her head against the pillow and her eyes closed. He thought she was asleep, but then she opened her eyes and saw him.

"Harvey, you came," Lillian Specter said as she eyed her eldest son in the doorway of her room.

"Not by choice. Donna had me call Marcus and then Dr. Tulane called my cell."

Harvey walked the few more inches to where his mother lay.

"I won't pretend you're glad to see me because I know you're not. However, take a seat. There are things you need to know."

Harvey looked for a chair in the private room and found one. Placing it next to the bed, he sat down and with a clenched jaw said, "So tell me".

 _Back in the past_...

 _Harvey arrived back at home and looked all over and his mother was still nowhere downstairs. He had an inkling the entire time he drove home as to where his mother was hiding. Upon entering his house, he did not call for his mother, but when upstairs quietly and opened the first door on the right._

 _"Harvey!" Lillian Specter, blonde and built, lay on top of a man not her husband exclaimed at seeing her eldest son's shock at being caught in the act of infidelity._

 _Harvey ignored the man who immediately maneuvered himself out from under Lillian and quickly dressing while he said:_

 _"Sorry, son, didn't mean for this to happen. Lillian, I'll call you later."_

 _Harvey eyes blazing turned on the half- naked lover of his mother's and said in a low ominous voice._

 _"Get out before I call the police on both of you for trespass. Yeah, I don't give a shit you're my mother. You don't belong in this house! Now put on your clothes, mother! I'm taking you to the hospital to sign some papers for Marcus."_

 _"What happened to Marcus, Harvey?" Lillian asked suddenly concerned that her youngest son, her baby, was suddenly in the hospital._

 _John Olivo, his mother's lover, summarily exited when he saw the panic on Lillian Specter's face when her elder son mentioned the condition of her baby._

 _Harvey reared on his mother who had escaped into the bathroom to dress._

 _"You didn't hear me yelling or the sirens from the ambulance. What were you so exhausted from your little illicit afternoon delight that you couldn't hear anything? The walls in this house are not that thick mother."_

 _Lillian Specter walked out of the bathroom and proceeded to slap her eldest son in the face._

 _"You don't speak to your mother that way. It is none of your concern what I do or don't do when you're father is away. You show me some respect."_

 _Harvey had rubbed the area where his mother's slap had landed. He narrowed his eyes at her. He was taller than her now at six feet and sneeringly looking down on her said, "You have to earn respect, mother. Right now you're not getting shit from me. Furthermore, I'm telling dad as soon as he is home."_

 _"We'll talk about that later," Lillian hedged. "Right now, take me to Marcus. He must be scared."_

 _With that Harvey walked out of the room, down the stairs, out of the house and waited for his mother to accompany him to the hospital to see Marcus._

Present day...

"Mother, what do I need to know?" Harvey wondered as he sat in the chair next to his mother's bed. As he sat there memory after difficult and horrible memory flashed through Harvey's mind culminating in the day when his mother left with her lover leaving his father and her sons behind. His father had been heartbroken and sad. He actually cried. His father was a musician and a passionate one at that. Harvey who did love music but loved his father more was a different man. He was hurt, but his hurt was not for show. He had to be strong because his father and little brother were not.

"I just wanted to let you know that I forgave you for all the years you have shut me out of your life. Every time I saw your name in the paper or heard another accolade laid upon you it made me proud to be the woman who had given birth to you. Also how you helped your little brother. You turned out to be a good man, Harvey. I just wanted you to know that ," Lillian said hoping her son would understand that despite all the years she had been without him he was still her son and she loved him.

Harvey looked at it from the side he had always seen it. His mother had been the one in the wrong not him.

"What do you mean you forgive me? I would think you would be asking me for your forgiveness after what you did. Leaving us emotionally and then physically after 18 years? You do realize that Marcus was all of 12 when you left. You left dad to handle two boys on his own. As for me, I can't tell you what that did to my psyche and emotion."

"You seemed to have come out all right. You have a beautiful wife and two children."

"Yeah. No thanks to you. You don't know how close I came to never having that."

Lillian rose up in her bed and turned to face her elder son.

"Harvey, I know you think I hurt your father, but you did not and still do not understand what our marriage was like."

"I don't care. All I know is when you supposedly love someone and marry them there is a little thing called fidelity. I don't think you know the meaning of the word."

"Harvey, please hear me out."

"Have you explained this to Marcus?" Harvey asked fuming and pushing the chair back rising in a temper. He was so close to just leaving knowing that whatever she could say for herself would never be enough for all the years he spent emotionally blocked. It was hard for him to sit there or to stand there and listen to this woman (albeit the woman who gave birth to him) tell him things about a marriage or about his father whom he adored with all his heart. A man who Harvey vowed he would never turn into, so he used women for his own pleasures for twenty years until he realized that he loved only one woman and to not tell her how he felt meant that he could have lost her in so many ways.

"Harvey!" Lillian exclaimed as she started to get out of bed.

"What!"

Suddenly a nurse came in and asked for them to be quiet or Harvey would be removed from the hospital.

Harvey apologized and decided that he had had enough.

"Look, mother, I have had a long day. All I want to do is go home. I don't care what you have to say because how can I believe it to be true? You lied so much to all of us that there is no way that I can believe whatever words come out of your mouth. I am going home. I will return tomorrow morning and maybe I will be in a better mood to accept what you claim to be an explanation for disloyal behavior."

Harvey walked out of his mother's hospital room. Lillian Specter began to cry because she understood fully how she had really damaged her family.


	5. Chapter 5 - Mother and Sons

Chapter 6

When Harvey returned home after his visit to his mother's hospital room, he walked in the door to find his 18 month old daughter playing with her kitchen playset mimicking Donna in the kitchen who was warming Harvey's dinner that he missed.

"There's my big girl," Harvey went over and picked her up and kissed her. Amanda knowing who had picked her up immediately started to pretend feed her daddy what was in her pretend pot.

"Mmmm," Harvey said with wide eyes and kissing his daughter and holding her tight as he carried her over to where Donna was in the kitchen.

Harvey went behind the counter and kissed Donna hello.

"Well, so how did it go? Strange confronting her after all these years, right?" Donna asked knowing that something had rattled her husband. Fiercely affectionate with his children and his wife, there was an intensity in the air that was not missed on Donna. She who knew him so well knew that something was not right.

Amanda started to squirm and both Donna and Harvey kissing her simultaneously on each cheek this time put her down and watched as she toddled back to her kitchen playset. Once settled there, she had plopped on her little Osh B'gosh behind and continued to stir her imaginary concoction while her parents sat down at the dining room table and began to discuss what happened at the hospital.

"Where's Gordon?" Harvey asked concerned.

"He's asleep. I think he's down for the count. It's been three hours and I haven't heard a peep out of him," Donna said as she waggled the baby monitor in her hand.

"Good. Because I really need to talk with you about my mother," Harvey said.

This was such a different Harvey than the one Donna had worked for so many years. Donna was, of course, the only one he would talk to about anything even if Donna had to do all the work and pull it out of him. However, in the last few years, Harvey had let down his walls knowing that if he showed a little bit of emotion people would respond and like him a lot more. Not that he cared about being liked especially at the office, but he wanted to be loved by those he loved just like any other human being.

"What happened?" Donna asked putting her hand lovingly over Harvey's hand.

"She starts out by saying she's proud of the way I turned out and that she _forgives me_ for my behavior all those years ago.

Donna thought as Harvey that those were strange words coming out of a woman whose behavior had damaged a family and the worst damage to her eldest son. Donna continued to sit there silently waiting for Harvey to complete his tale.

"Can you imagine the unmitigated gall that woman has? She forgives me? What did I do? "

"You did what you had to do. You stood by your father and helped finish raising your brother. It could not have been easy," Donna said as Harvey had begun to pace the floor with his hands in his pockets. He waved to Mandy as she had turned around at the raising of Harvey's voice as he continued. Last thing he needed was to scare his daughter with his anger about her grandmother.

"It wasn't easy. I kept the secrets all those years and I had finally had it. So I did what I told her I was going to do and tell my father. I was 20 and out of the house. My poor brother didn't think anything of it, but he got no more affection from my mother than I did. Well, that's not true. Marcus had always been the baby so we all shielded him until he was old enough to realize."

"He was 14 when your mother left, right?" Donna asked.

"Yes, it was difficult. He blamed himself and he started to act out at school by getting in trouble which prevented my father from taking any real lucrative gigs. Dad played locally and was once in a while called in for a studio gig, but nothing like he was able to produce when my mother was home. She also said that I did not understand what her marriage to my father was really like. She wanted to explain that to me, and I didn't want to hear it."

"Harvey," Donna interjected. "In light of your mother's condition, maybe you should at least hear her out. Would it help if Marcus was with you?"

"I don't want to drag him into this. It's my problem with mother not Marcus'. He never held anything against her. He continued to say that the damage was really done to dad and no matter what happened we were still her sons and she demanded respect for that."

"Of course because you were the older one and saw more you feel your brother is wrong," Donna said. "Well I think it would help you and your mother if your brother was with you when you spoke with her again."

Harvey stood next to his wife and looked down at the sheen of her red hair in the dim dining room light. He looked at her little replica across the room now lying down with her teddy bear and juice cup. Mandy looked like she was about to fall asleep.

"Donna," Harvey said quietly

"Yes, Harvey," Donna said looking up at him. "You want me to call your brother in the morning and get him a reservation to come in, right?"

Harvey's look was the only thing that conveyed his acquiescence.

Donna smirked. "Already done. She showed him an online receipt. " Marcus' plane arrives at 10:30 am, and Ray will pick him up and drive him to the office."

"Excellent," Harvey said and kissed Donna in appreciation.

The next day being Sunday was crazy. Donna had to confer with Laura Zane about Rachel's wedding shower as well cancel all of Harvey's appointments and court dates for the next three days. Marcus was coming into the office with Ray today and Harvey drove to the office to meet him there and then they were to both confront their mother at the hospital. Donna tried to keep her mind on what Laura Zane was saying about how Rachel had always wanted this and that for her wedding, but her mind kept drifting off to what Harvey was facing. Personally she thought his confrontation with his mother should have happened a long time ago, but it had not and it had continued to fester in Harvey's soul poisoning any relationship he touched. Donna knew Harvey's commitment issues were due to his mother, but she also knew that Harvey was like a little boy inside. Happily he was able to overcome his issues and finally settle down like his brother. She and Harvey were happy. He loved his children and he loved her. He was able to show it and was there when she and/or the children needed him. That obviously was different from his mother and Harvey held onto that and was glad.

"Let's have the shower here and then it is just a little walk to the kitchen where the buffet will be set up. Donna?" Laura had said seeing the faraway expression on Donna's face.

"Oh, my, Lord, Laura. I am so sorry. I blanked out there."

"Is everything all right, Donna?"

"I'm sorry. I'm fine. What was that you were saying about the buffet?"

"I think we'll just have it here in the kitchen and then people can go outside if it's still warm or filter in here to the den where we'll decorate and Rachel can open her presents here. What do you think?"

"I think it will be wonderful. Your house is beautiful, Laura."

"Thank you. Rachel has shown me picture of yours. It is beautiful as well."

"Thank you. We are usually only there on weekends and vacations. Most of the time we still live at Harvey's...our... condo in the city. I love our house, though, the location, and that I was allowed to decorate it the way I wanted. Harvey gave me carte blanche since he didn't care as long as it wasn't too feminine. I think it turned out a good combination of the two of us."

"Like children," Laura Zane said as she looked at baby Gordon in his baby seat. Amanda was with Aunt Rachel while her mother plotted with Rachel's mother for the wedding shower.

"Oh, him? He's not Harvey's," Donna joked to which both women laughed heartily to break the moment's creeping heaviness.

"Oh, he's Harvey's all right," Robert Zane said as he came into the spacious kitchen and had caught the last of Donna's joke.

"He's been giving me that Specter stare from the minute I walked into the room," Rachel's father said as he waggled his fingers in baby Gordon's direction. Then Gordon started to cry.

"He even reacts the same way Harvey does when he sees me," Robert Zane joked.

Laura Zane and Donna started laughing as little Gordon started to wail. Laura asked if she could pick him up and Donna nodded her assent.

"Oh, I think I know why he started to fuss. I knew it wasn't you, dear. You're good with babies," Laura said to her husband.

Donna felt all around Gordon's seat and felt he may have been a tad uncomfortable. Like his daddy, he was a fastidious man.

"He's wet, isn't he?" Donna asked Laura.

Taking the baby from her, Donna said, "I'll just change him and then I will have to get going. I think we have some good ideas for her shower. I will call the bakery and the caterer and let you know what I come up with, ok?" Donna said.

"That's fine. I'll work on the decorations. Rachel sure chose some pretty colors for her wedding but how I am going to replicate that I'm not so sure."

"You're working with me. We'll pull it off," Donna said confidently.

"Marcus, it's good to see you," Harvey said as his brother exited the long black Lexus. Harvey looked at his brother and hugged him. Marcus was broader built than Harvey with curly blonde hair and large blue eyes unlike Harvey's deep brown ones. The men were of a height and upon deeper inspection one could tell they were related in some way.

"Thanks, Ray. See you Tuesday."

Ray waved at his boss and drove off.

"Harvey how bad is she?"

"Well, she doesn't seem that bad which is in direct contradiction of what the doctor says."

"You needed me here to make a judgment or what?"

"I needed you here for support. I can't face her alone again or there's no telling what I might do. I caused so much ruckus I was almost removed by security."

"Whoa, dickhead, dickhead move, and I mean that with all my heart."

"I know you do. That's why I need you."

"Donna said something like that. I got your back. Say can we eat first? I didn't have time to grab anything as Kate was busy getting Markie to football practice and the other two to their soccer games. Say you are coming up for the playoffs, right? It would break Markie's heart if Uncle Harvey and Aunt Donna weren't there."

"Of course we're coming. It's next week, right? We'll make a trip of it. Donna's recovered pretty much from Gordon's birth and Amanda will be happy to see her cousins again not to mention Aunt Kate who's her favorite aunt."

Once Harvey would not have cared about little things such as children, peewee football games, or what people meant to people. He knew about it and could empathize but to him, once, it had all been for someone else not him. He had always cared deeply for his brother and father, but now that he was a husband, a father, and an Uncle life meant so much more to him. His career was still important but he did not lie awake at nights strategizing for four different clients at a time. He realized he could still be an effective lawyer and still have some type of life. He learned that Rachel and Mike were able to do those little things and do them well so Harvey did not have to. Harvey still had Donna as his secretary and just because she was his wife and mother of his children did not mean that she could not focus on the job while on the job.

However, his own mother was a different type altogether.

When they arrived at their mother's room, she was not there but had been taken for some more tests to see the progress of the tumor's growth.

The nurses wheeled her back in and had given her some medication. The nurses assured them that she would be lucid for another 30 minutes until the medication kicked in and she would go to sleep. The medication was part of the chemotherapy they had begun to try to dissolve or shrink the tumor. Marcus had said she had undergone something like that treatment a few months ago while she was living in Upper New York with her current lover.

"There they are, my sons. Aren't they the two most handsome men in New York City, Leslie?" She asked the attending nurse.

"Yes, they are both very handsome. However, didn't you tell me they were both off the market?" Leslie a small blonde nurse weighing all of 100 lbs dressed in scrubs gibed with her patient.

"Yes, unfortunately, they are. I have five grandchildren between the two of them. I've only seen three of them, though. I hope I will be able to see my other two while I'm here." Lillian Specter said.

Harvey knew, of course, that she meant his children. However, he was not going to let that get him sidetracked and have to wend their way back to the matter at hand.

Marcus leaned over and kissed his mother on the cheek. He gave her a hug as best he could since she was lying down. Harvey just turned the other way not wanting to have his mother get the wrong idea and that her disability would wear him down and he would actually try to be affectionate with her. _Not happening_ his thoughts said to him.

"Ok, you have us both here, mother. What is it you wanted to say?" Harvey said without so much as a _"how are you"_ or _"are you getting the best care"_ because frankly Harvey did not give a shit. He wanted out of this uncomfortable situation and "pretend" like he had for twenty years that his mother had never really existed.

Lillian Specter sat up straighter in her bed and then looked her eldest son in the eye.

"Harvey. I know you feel betrayed by me. I was never an angel. I am sure your father told you once I had left for good. It is in me not to be faithful even when I say I am. I have a restless nature."

"Mom, we get the idea. If you are just going to repeat what we've known for the last twenty/thirty years you can save your breath and we can go home to our respective families."

"Harvey!" Marcus exclaimed looking at his brother who was now standing at the foot of the bed.

"No, it's ok, Marcus. I think I deserved that." Lillian reached for a tissue from the box sitting on her lap.

"Ok, I see Harvey how uncomfortable you are. You think because I said I forgive you for your behavior toward me that it should be the other way around. Well, I am not so sure."

Harvey went over to the chair next to where his brother sat and looking like a child who was just reprimanded just sat there, clenching his jaw, and rubbing his hands constantly like he was ready for a fight.

Lillian finally sat back and relaxed. She addressed each son as if the other was not in the room. She started with Marcus and regaled how much he was like his father and that she was glad he was successful and glad that she had not lost touch with him since she had left him and his brother and father when Marcus was was just starting puberty. After stating that he had made her happy these past few years, Marcus rose from his chair and hugged his mother tightly. He then left the room for a little air and to give some alone time between his mother and his brother. Marcus did not really want to be there because he knew it was not going to be pretty.

Harvey had listened to his mother and her memories of Marcus and his family. Harvey almost fell for it that she was truly happy and finally been repentant except that all Harvey could see in his mind's eye was his father's tears the night his mother and her lover walked out their door never to return. It's not that Harvey disrespected his father at that moment, but he felt that no one no matter how much you love them should walk all over you and make you feel that way. Harvey remembered all too well those walls he had erected and how they kept him from the woman he truly loved or any woman he had come to care about. Harvey still did not like feeling emotional or vulnerable, but he handled it much better now thanks to those who truly loved him in return.

After Marcus had left it did not take long for his mother to pounce on him.

"Now Harvey, what I want to say to you will be very different as you can anticipate."

"Other than an apology of how you treated my father I can't think of a thing. Are you even sorry? You know that man was depressed for weeks. He missed two or three sessions because when he picked up his sax he thought of you. I caught him crying at night at the dining room table when I came home. I felt I couldn't stay in the dorms anymore because he needed me and Marcus needed me. When I saw how much you hurt him, I vowed never to allow myself to feel that vulnerable not to feel hurt or even to feel shame. I never regretted it until I almost lost the one thing that means everything to me. Do you know what that was?"

Lillian smiled a little knowing smile, "Your wife, perhaps, Harvey? I am not an idiot. You were never a pushover. You cared. You always care, Harvey. I never took that away from you. I just gave you a facade for the world to see so you go on and pretend when something didn't hurt. Well, you know what Harvey? I hurt, too. Why do you think I could no longer stay with you or your dad? You and I are very much alike. Marcus is more like your father was and was easy going and easy to love and hurt. I knew you were hurt just as much as your father and brother, but I knew you would take care of them. I couldn't. I was selfish. I know that. I was tired of being a musician's wife with very little money, so I grabbed onto the next guy who might have afforded the kind of life I thought I would have had with your dad. When he realized that there was something amiss at home, he never took a long six month gig with a band or even listen to his agent when he had something really lucrative lined up for him. That's what made me sick. We had very little. I tried to work but I had no experience other than being a groupie, so I wasn't good for anything. Finally when I found John he gave me a little money. Now you can call him a "sugar daddy" or call me a "whore" but that was how I found salvation. It allowed me to afford the things I had dreamed of. I was also in a position to help you and your brother if you had allowed. I know my version of salvation is not a very forgiving one I can understand from your point of view, but I have never regretted that I left. I knew you would take care of them. You were always the strong one, Harvey. I knew I left them in good hands. "

"Mother," Harvey began like he was talking to his baby daughter. " You left them in my hands and you should never have done that. I don't care what kind of life Olivo afforded you after I caught you with him. You were disloyal and unfaithful and you deserted a man whose only crimes were that he loved being a musician and a man who loved you with all his heart and passion. I felt then no one would ever hold so much of myself over my head that I would forget who I was. So, yes, I guess I became like you: arrogant, selfish, and spoiled. I never regretted my behavior because that is how I became a successful lawyer but at the same time I always tried to do what was right and good. The only woman who could hold that much of me started out as my secretary and a one night stand but now she is my wife. I could never do to her what you did to my father. So are you sorry for what you did or do you not regret it?"

Lillian hunkered down under the covers and was almost asleep when she said to Harvey, "I have never regretted anything I did. I loved your father. I loved him until the day he died. However, the one thing I did regret is not being allowed back in your life as a mother and a grandmother. I love you, Harvey. You are my firstborn and I never regretted giving birth to you."

Harvey wiped moisture out of his eyes. He wanted to forgive his mother and let the past be the past. He had wanted to do it for so many years, but the power of his father's face in his mind's eye the night Lillian left always prevented Harvey from coming to terms with his own feelings. He would then lose his resolve and forget all about it. It did feel good, though, to get those feeling out in the open. Sitting here listening to his mother's side of the story brought back Harvey's feelings the night his mother left. His response had become practiced after so many rejections like hers. When his mother left, all Harvey could do was bury his vulnerability and pick up the reigns that his father was not prepared to take after his mother's departure.

Just at that moment, Marcus returned to the room. He saw that their mother had fallen asleep. He walked over to see if she was sleeping peacefully. Harvey turned away momentarily from his brother as he tenderly brought the covers up to her shoulders and kiss her on the cheek that Harvey almost capitulated and wanted to emulate his brother. However, the old Harvey Specter resolve reared its ugly stubborn head and simply walked out of the room leaving Marcus running to catch up with his big brother.


	6. Chapter 6 - A Chip In the Road

Chapter 7 A Chip in the Road

It was a quiet ride back to West Chester. Harvey drove swiftly and once or twice over the speed limit wanting to do nothing more than see his wife and children. If it were not for the fact that his brother kept trying to get him to talk, Harvey would have forgotten all about how uncomfortable the day had been.

"Come on, dickhead, it couldn't have been that bad. I didn't hear any kicking or screaming when I came down the hall." After Marcus had caught up with Harvey outside the hospital, Marcus had tried to get Harvey to tell him a little of what happened in the room. It was now a couple of hours since the meeting and Marcus just sat there watching his brother's jaw clench and his fingers grasp and ungrasp the steering wheel of his 1969 Mustang.

Harvey blew out his breath and sighed. He felt like he had been holding his breath for a long, long time.

"You know, Marcus. I don't know. I just have a hard time believing that our mother left because she still loved dad and didn't want to put him through the agony of continued unfaithfulness. She admitted to being selfish and that she also thought that it was good that she left because she was now in a position to help us financially if we ever needed it."

"Which you never allowed. You would sell your own soul first before allowing mom and John to help."

Harvey took a quick look at his brother knowing, in fact, that's about what Harvey had done. Sold himself to Charles Forster just so his brother would have a second chance at life. Luckily, Harvey was able to turn the tables on that manipulative son-of-a-bitch and keep his brother and those he loved safe. His eyes turned back to the road.

"Harvey, it's been done and over with for many, many years. Don't you think you ought to forgive her? She was young and beautiful. Put yourself in her place. Two young boys and a man who was never there. A man who earned a living but had to travel and never made that much anyway. Do you not see where she was coming from? She felt like she was being wasted and when young men came and paid attention to her she used them to her advantage."

"Marcus, cut the "I did it for you" bullshit argument. If she had truly loved her husband and her children she would have tried better to make their lives easier or at least left him before she had us. That's what any unselfish person would do. Leave before things had gotten too far."

""You know, Harvey, you have a huge chip on your shoulder. It's a wonder I never saw it before. It's amazing you ever got Donna to marry you. She should have cast you off after the first year."

Harvey came to a screeching halt on the side of the highway. They were only a few miles from home, but Harvey was really getting angry with his brother's attitude and did not want to endanger either of their lives by continuing to drive in his present state of irritation.

"Marcus, this has nothing to do with my relationship with Donna."

"Then tell me, Harv, how did you finally get Donna to marry you? You finally decided to leave a safe little bubble and venture into this thing we call "life". You never stayed with one woman or another for more than a night. The only two exceptions were Scottie whom I know you really never trusted but you tried. Then, of course, the love of your life, Donna. You almost blew it. She would have eventually left. She's a beautiful and smart woman. The only stupid thing she had done was fall in love with you and be loyal to you waiting for a little crumb of affection to fall her way to teach her to hope. I suppose you blame that behavior on our mother."

"You know Marcus. This is all water over the bridge now. Incidentally you're right. I almost lost Donna. However, I blamed mom because our father was crushed when I told him about our mother's infidelities and the day she left was the worst. I saw such vulnerability and such a passion in loving another person that I perceived dad as weak because he cared. I never wanted to appear weak. I thought and I told mom this that no one ought to hold that much sway over another person that they forget who they are!"

Marcus momentarily turned away from his brother because he finally saw that little spark of loving kindness in those deep dark eyes when Harvey spoke of his wife. Harvey possessed kindness in his heart in spades. He just never wanted the world to know that the big, bad Harvey Reginald Specter was, after all, a human being and could be just as vulnerable and love just as passionately as their father. Marcus loved his big brother and he knew Harvey loved him in return just as much. So to see Harvey keep pretending to all that he could not forgive his mother, would not allow his walls to come down in time to make amends and allow their mother this little victory at the end of her life caused Marcus to see that Harvey and his mother were two stubborn jackasses; and both would go to their graves with regret.

Harvey clapped his brother's shoulder and shook him back and forth gently.

"I am so sorry, Marcus. I never wanted you to see that side of me." Harvey said staring at his brother's blue eyes.

"I know you're human you old softie..." Marcus said punching his brother in his gut playfully.

"Let's go home," Harvey said. "I'm sure Donna will pounce on us the minute we get home."

They arrived home just before sunset. Amanda's baby tricycle had been left in front yard. Harvey placed it on the porch behind the wall before anyone could either steal it or it rolled away of its own accord. Although the Specters lived in an upscale neighborhood, one could never be too careful.

"Hi honey, we're home..." Marcus said loudly as he and Harvey came through the door.

Donna came in from the den with her red hair up in a ponytail dressed in yoga pants and a leotard. She held her forefinger in front of her mouth indicating that they be quiet.

"I just got the both of them to sleep for the night. We spent most of the day outside it was so beautiful. They wore their little selves out. You, (pointing at Marcus), will be a treat for them especially Mandy. How are you doing, Marcus? You look great," Donna said as she gave her brother-in-law a hug. Then her husband came seeking a kiss which she gladly gave him. She was surprised as Harvey's arms wound around her and held her tight. They were usually never very affectionate in front of people, but once in a while Harvey would surprise Donna with a kiss or his arm would find his way around her waist and gently squeeze. The stimulus which drove Harvey to this behavior always puzzled Donna because sometimes not even she, alone, could draw affection from him.

Donna moved into the den where she folded up her yoga mat and pressed the "stop" button on the DVR.

"You don't have to stop your yoga on our account, you know," Harvey said.

"Of course I do if I want to know what happened. Besides I'm done. Having that second baby, Specter, has made me a fat frump. You'll be lucky if I ever get fabulous again."

Harvey knew she was playing with him goading him into a compliment. Feeling generous as he saw how beautiful she was and knew she was working hard to be beautiful for him, he kissed her on the lips and said under his breath. "How's about you teach me some new yoga later, gorgeous?"

"Only you, Specter, only you," Donna said and patted his cheek.

Harvey smiled and looked into Donna's eyes hopefully showing her how happy he was to be home and with her.

Harvey pulled a bottle of scotch from the liquor cabinet and three glasses.

"Donna?"

"Oh, sure. It only makes Gordon sleep better if he gets a little booze in him," she joked. Actually she was going to have to wean Gordon early. Her milk just continually oozed from her breasts no matter how much she expressed. It was becoming rather inconvenient now that she was back at the office.

"You want our son to become an alcoholic at two months old?" Harvey joked.

"Funny, I thought he would have gotten that from his father considering that's how he got here in the first place." Donna rejoined.

"Oooo, good one," Marcus joined in the banter.

"Touche," Harvey said handing Donna the glass.

They all took a sip of the strong liquid. Harvey sat back on the plush couch and putting his arm around his wife took Donna with him. He kissed her on the nose and she laid her head on his shoulder. She could smell the outdoors on him plus his aftershave and his unique scent which made her feel safe and secure. It's funny because before they were a couple, his own masculine scent which pervaded through every pore of his office was what constantly drove her to him. He had always made her feel safe.

Marcus sat in the recliner across from the large glass coffee table. The recliner was bent halfway back when Marcus sighed, "What a day."

"What happened? Was it that bad?" Donna asked concerned for these two men, brothers, but for all you knew could have been strangers so unlike the other each was. _Well_ , upon reflection Donna thought, _maybe not that much different._

"They butt heads," Marcus said accusingly.

"Well, I suspected as much. Your brother has a very hard head so it butts up against the best of us," Donna volunteered.

"Whose side are you on?" Harvey said laughing a tiny bit looking at his wife.

"I'm on everyone's side. Forgive and forget, Harvey. Why continue to hold a grudge over something that happened so long ago?"

Harvey squeezed Donna against his side and as he looked up into her own dark eyes said quietly almost to her alone, "Because it brings back to me how much time we...I...wasted. We could have been together that much longer instead of feeling like we have to make up time for what I did."

Donna straightened and giving him a no-nonsense stare. "Things turn out the way they are supposed to." What if we had gotten together back then before your goals were achieved? You probably would have resented having a wife and children and blame us from you not achieving your potential. Instead of us being together now and successful we could easily have been divorced by now and I could have possibly taken our children and cohabited with a much more less deserving guy. We would have been probably unhappy instead of happy. You are happy, finally, Specter, aren't you?"

Harvey smiled. "Of course I am. I couldn't be happier."

Marcus chimed in and said, 'Ok good. Now that's out of the way, here's what happened..."

Marcus and Harvey both told Donna of their time with their mother. Donna came to feel that maybe Harvey just needed a little more push before he could really truthfully forgive his mother for all her inequities.

Monday came in like a lion. The beautiful Indian summer had turned quickly to cold. Donna knew Halloween was in a week, but before that she had to finalize the plans for Rachel's shower set for mid November just about a week before Thanksgiving and a month before the wedding. Being that Donna had cancelled all of Harvey's appointments and court appearances for two days, she had little time to contact the caterer and make an appointment to go see them. At the moment, it was 9:00 am and normally she and Harvey would have been in the office for an hour and Donna's mom would be here to look after the children before they both or Donna alone would come home and give mom relief. She had contemplated asking Harvey to allow her mother to stay a couple more months until she felt ready to give Gordon over to daycare, but on second thought Donna thought it would stretch the goodwill between her mom and her husband. After all, Roberta Paulsen knew how long it had taken Harvey Specter to snatch up her daughter before she could no longer bear him children.

Donna was sipping her coffee and gazing out the large kitchen window. She spotted Orioles in the branches of the tree whose branches would slightly tap at the window on a truly windy day.

"Well, hi, little person, how are you this morning?" Donna greeted her little red haired daughter walking her way to the kitchen island where Donna sat.

"Mommy," Mandy Specter said her eyes wide knowing that having her mom home three days in a row was a real treat.

"Want waffles?"

"Daddy's waffles," Mandy said distinctly. Harvey had a special recipe waffle he would make for the Mandy and her. He refused to give Donna the recipe stating that someday he would teach his daughter and son but that only born Specters were allow to know it. Donna, of course, knew that the secret ingredients were cinnamon and sugar in the mix, but she allowed Harvey this one hold over her.

"Daddy's outside with guess who?"

"Unca Marcs?" Mandy managed to say.

"Yep. I think they are coming in now. How about we meet them at the door? Your brother will be up soon and I will have to feed him," Donna led Mandy by the hand to the door where they waited until Harvey opened the door accompanied by Marcus.

Harvey opened the door and instead of jumping into her father's arms, Mandy ran right to her Uncle Marcus.

"There's one of the prettiest little girls in all the world," Marcus said to her as he swept her up into his arms all the while watching his brother roll his eyes almost as if that was the last thing that Harvey would say to his own child.

"Daddy's getting jealous," Harvey said as he kissed his daughter and took her from Marcus. Harvey carried her into the room and put her down in front of her big Victorian dollhouse in the children's playroom just adjacent to Harvey's den.

"Do you mind staying with her for a few minutes, Marcus? I have to work out some plans with Donna before we go back to the city, ok?"

"It would be my pleasure. Take all the time you need."

Harvey found Donna in the nursery feeding Gordon.

"Honey," Harvey said as he quietly approached his wife and son. It was times like these that Harvey had a hard time believing he actually had finally settled down. That was his beautiful wife feeding their son who was growing bigger by the minute. Soon they could share men's stuff like Harvard football and boxing and Harvey's all time favorite - baseball.

Harvey came closer and kissed Donna on the top of her head as his gaze fell to his son at her breast. He hungrily suckled.

Pointing to their son with her one hand, she said quietly, "He definitely inherited your suckling technique."

"Isn't it a little early to be provocative?"

"Who's provocative? I'm just telling you the truth."

Feeling playful Harvey bent lower next to her ear, "I could jump on the other one and you could compare."

"Harvey..."

"Hey you brought it up."

Laughing at their banter which since they had married had become almost foreplay, Donna looked up into Harvey's deep dark eyes which had suddenly become serious.

"What's the matter, love?"

"Marcus and I are going back into the city to see mom. Is that going to be a problem? I know you said you had to see the caterer about Rachel's shower..."

"No, it's ok. I'll just take the kids with me. I will see you later then."

"What do you think you will resolve this time?" Donna asked Harvey as he had turned away and was leaving the room.

Harvey turned around at her question. He threw his arms out as if to give up.

"I have no idea."

Harvey turned back and left the room leaving Donna wondering what would happen next.


	7. Chapter 7 - Harvey Who?

Chapter 8

Donna walked into the "Room for a Venue Caterers" and was remarkably on time for her appointment with Sergei the caterer host. Her appointment had been at two in the afternoon and her alarm on her cell phone just pinged two as she opened the door to the caterer's storefront pulling the double stroller with both children sitting quietly (for now ) in it.

"Mrs. Specter, how nice to see you," Sergei said kissing her hand gallantly. Donna thought _OMG over the top isn't he?_ "Thank you. It is nice to put a face to a voice."

Sergei was a nice looking man about Donna's age. He was gallant in manner. He was as tall as Donna and strongly built. Under his suit, Donna thought he probably had some large muscles. He was not exactly her type, but she thought at least she did not have to deal with some smug little woman who had been a spinster and took it out on her clients by seducing them into the most extravagant and expensive outlays.

"These are your children. Oh they are adorable. I can tell this little one is going to be a beauty," he said to Amanda as she glared at the strange man laying his hand on her head. At that moment, Donna swore she saw Harvey's warning glare come from her daughter. Most people said Mandy looked like Donna; however, Donna could see that Amanda had her own red hair and light complexion but she had Harvey's eyes and at that moment Mandy was channeling her father.

Luckily Gordon did not wake up. Donna had just fed him before putting him in the minivan. She knew she had a least a couple of good hours before he woke up famished. The secret to keeping him satisfied for hopefully more than a couple of hours was that she not only fed from the breast but had fed him a couple of baby portions of baby oatmeal. She only hoped it worked because she did not want to have to take time out and feed a crying baby in the middle of the appointment.

Sergei was a man's man. He was known in the catering world as the "catch" for the opposite sex. He was not a homosexual which most people pigeonholed him since he was in the party catering business and unmarried. No matter how delicious looking he was. Sergei whose real name was Samuel Peach not Sergei Patronov was always charming to the female clients and totally masculine in his dealings with the male gender when they were occasioned to need his services. Sergei was taken with Donna from the minute she walked into his offices. She was beautiful with a mane of fiery red hair, porcelain skin lightly brushed with freckles. He loved the fact that Donna was tall, thin, but with a voluptuous bosom and long sensuous legs. Sergei nearly lost his breath while speaking with her and although she wheeled in a two child baby carriage Sergei wanted her from the moment he laid eyes on her. Donna was dressed to the nines today in her Victoria Beckham print dress and her best Fendi heels. Mandy looked like a little replica in her own designer dress, white socks and black patent leather Mary Jane shoes. Gordon looked like a little handsome replica of his father with a teeny tiny suit which Donna hoped would remain intact for his church dedication next month.

Sergei helped Donna get the children situated which meant that Mandy had to be taken out of the carriage put in a playroom. Donna sat in the playroom with Mandy while she left Gordon in the stroller sound asleep. Luckily he was only a couple of months old. If he woke up all he would do is cry not squirm and fall out of the carriage.

"Now Mrs. Specter, you said your friend's wedding colors were...?"

"They are teal, pale yellow and a light sort of magenta. I would like to have her shower cake frosting striped with those colors and the writing in Magenta. Now about the food itself I was looking over your menu online and I must say you do have quite a variety."

"Yes, I cater all types of parties and all cultures, so I can provide the unusual for any occasion. Let me show you our more extensive party menus." Sergei said as he brought forth his tablet from under the table where they sat.

"Rachel is a foodie, so I am attempting to make this a plethora of her favorite foods," Donna said.

"You are a most loyal friend. Now here's my ultimate package..."

The choices went on forever and since there really was no budget between the bridesmaids, Donna, and Rachel's mother the sky was the limit. After about an hour, though, Donna's head was spinning, but she had chosen a half Thai cuisine along with some American dishes and a cake which promised to be a large sheet cake with wedding colors and writing saying "Congratulations, Rachel and Mike, December 14, 2017". Sergei was also supplying the liquor and his own bartender which Sergei had thrown in for free. Donna put the down payment on her credit card.

"Thank you, Mrs. Specter, I will collect the balance at the party on November 12th. I must say your friend is most lucky. Your husband is lucky as well."

"Why do you say that?" Donna said while outwardly acknowledging the truth she wanted to hear what Sergei had meant.

"Because his wife is beautiful, friendly, and his children are beautiful and well behaved I must say."

Donna laughed a little and letting Sergei take her hand once more allowed him to kiss it and stroke it slowly.

"Thank you, Sergei. You will contact me to confirm a week before the party, correct? Also you will be there yourself so I can introduce you to Laura Zane, the bride's mother."

"Yes. Surely. Thank you, Mrs. Specter, and have a lovely day."

_ After Donna left, Sergei started working on Rachel's bridal shower. He would be overseeing on the day of the shower and not have one of his assistants work it. He had to see Donna again. He felt he could not get enough of her. She had been flirtatious of a sort and had given him a couple looks of encouragement.

Donna could not have known that Sergei was in pursuit of her. Donna, although happily married to Harvey, was not aware that she had been flirting with a dangerous man. Donna knew how men liked to be handled and her power had not been diminished because she could now add mother to her list of titles. She still had her husband on the hook in and out of the office and she knew firsthand that Harvey was always proud that he could show her off. However, Donna may have not been paying much attention this time as she was concentrating intently on what Rachel's likes and dislikes were and trying to maintain some semblance of attention on her children. Once or twice Donna saw the nasty looks that Mandy gave Sergei, but she just thought it was because the place was not "kid-friendly" and that she had to be put in a corner for most of the afternoon.

Sergei on the other hand with his dark good looks and slight Russian accent (faked) made women swoon the minute he walked into a room. To most people he appeared capable and attentive but to those few for whom he fell hard, he could be demanding and suffocating. The fact that some of these women he pursued and conquered were married mattered little to Sergei as he liked the chase and the catch but cared little for the woman herself. As soon as the husband discovered the affair usually by an oft phone call or gossip leakage, Sergei disappeared into thin air. Never remaining anywhere long enough to either be threatened by a cuckold husband or implicated in a divorce suit. However, Donna was different. She had grabbed Sergei's unbreakable heart along with his erotic thoughts. In time Sergei would see how far he would get in his pursuit of Mrs. Harvey Reginald Specter.

Harvey's time with his mother was not going much better today than yesterday. However, this time Marcus was playing mediator and not letting things get out of hand. Also today being earlier their mother did not just have a chemotherapy treatment. So Lillian Specter was lucid and more than ready for combat.

"Harvey, can I at least see a picture of Amanda and Gordon?"

"Come on, Harvey. You can't really be that hard hearted," begged Marcus.

Harvey looked at Marcus with a quizzical look and then looked back at the pathetic woman lying in the bed. He decided to divorce himself emotionally from the situation and pretend he was dealing with clients. He reached into his suit pocket for his cell phone where many of his impromptu pictures were kept. He just took a couple of snapshots the other day so she would be seeing the most recent. He swiped through some pictures which did not show much but a lot of people for whom needed an explanation. He stopped on their wedding portrait which Harvey shot the other day and wanted to keep close to him. If everyone who knew the cold Harvey Specter knew that he was so sentimental that he kept a picture of his wedding portrait on his phone they would say that they definitely had the wrong guy.

"Here, mom, this isn't the kids but it is Donna and me on our wedding day. I thought you might like to look at that as well."

Gratefully Lillian took the phone from Harvey's grasp and smiled when she saw the portrait.

"Oh you are a beautiful couple, Harvey. Donna is so beautiful and I know she probably doesn't stand any nonsense from you."

"Remember she worked for me ten years before we got married, so yeah, I guess you could say she puts me in my place."

"Lovely."

Lillian handed Harvey's phone back to him and he swiped through some more photos. He finally found one that he snapped of Mandy while she was not paying attention. Mandy was a bit of a ham when she saw a camera around. She had been playing with her kitchen set the other day all dressed up in her little print dress and Mary Jane's. He had called her name and she looked back at her daddy and smiled the cutest smile. Harvey had snapped the picture just in time.

"Here's Amanda Elizabeth Specter all dressed up at almost 19 months old."

When Lillian saw the picture a tear rolled down her cheek. "She's beautiful. She has Donna's coloring, but she has your eyes and she looks just like you at that age."

"You mean you remember back that far?"

"Of course, I do, Harvey. You are my firstborn and I still have my memories and pictures of both of you."

Harvey did not think his mom had taken anything with her to remind her of them. Harvey was beginning to think that maybe he had judged his mother too hard. _Nah_ he thought. _She's conniving...just like me. Maybe she's just trying to get me to feel sorry for her...of course._

Lillian handed back the phone to Harvey again.

He swiped one more time to show the picture of Gordon right after his birth. Donna was radiant, tired, and Gordon was asleep on her chest.

"Here's Gordon right after he was born," Harvey said as he handed the phone back one more time to his mother.

"He is so cute. He's what almost three months old now?" Lillian asked.

"Yes, he'll be three months old November 4th."

"Now I've seen their pictures I wish I could see them in person."

Harvey lowered his head in decision. Maybe everyone was right. Maybe he should just break that wall down. It was hard for Harvey because all the emotional walls he had erected had come tumbling down once he hired Mike and then for sure when he married Donna. It was almost his right to keep one wall up and solid.

"I'll think about it. Do you know when you'll be discharged?"

"Do you really want to know, Harvey?" Lillian asked looking at her son. She knew she had made progress but she did not want to push it. She had conversed with Marcus the previous night after he had made it to Harvey's and arrangements were being made for her to stay until she died with Marcus and his family. Lillian would not exactly stay in the same house, but she would stay in a facility that her money or her insurance could afford.

"Of course, I want to know," Harvey said insulted.

"Ok, I am just saying you didn't care before."

"Mom, I think we're getting through to him."

"Watch it Marcus. You'll be driving yourself to the airport tonight," Harvey warned.

It was a surprise to Lillian that Marcus was going home. However, she knew that everyone was busy with their lives. She only hoped that Harvey would not forget she was in the hospital and leave her here without some contact. She had been very lonely since John had died and her latest boyfriend had left her for a younger more, healthy woman.

"Well, please just don't forget I'm in here. I'm sure they will discharge me in a day or so. I can only take so many treatments before my body needs a rest."

Marcus began saying, "I'll talk to...

Harvey jumped in. "We'll talk to the doctor tonight. I'll see when he thinks he'll be discharging you."

Marcus looked at his brother and thought. _Finally.._.

It was now 3 pm. Marcus' plane took off at 7. There was just enough time to get dinner and get him to the airport. Harvey had driven Marcus in himself and let Ray have the entire day off. Harvey would go back to work tomorrow and probably Donna would go in on Wednesday after she had time to pack the kids things for staying at their condo for a few days. Donna's sister, Julia, usually drove their mother in when she stayed at the condo. Once the children were school age and in private school the weekly schedule would be less hectic. It was a good thing that the children were less than two years apart because they would be in school at the same time.

"That's was really nice of you, Harve. I think mom really appreciated it," Marcus said as he and Harvey ate their dinner at Lumiere's a place where Harvey had taken a client or two for dinner. A long time ago Harvey had had a one night stand with one of the younger more attractive hostesses here, however, she had stopped working here a few years ago and once she knew Harvey was off the market she served more tables where the men were good looking but single.

"What do you mean? I just showed the pictures to her. I'm always proud to show off my kids. Just like you," Harvey said pretending that what he did meant nothing.

"Well, it meant a lot to mom. I also liked the way you took charge about talking to the doctor," Marcus continued.

"I was thinking about it. I could hear Donna in the back of my head saying that I should let the walls come down and work things out. Now I know you and mom had this arrangement that once she was discharged that you would find her a hospice up near you. I haven't seen how much of mom's insurance money or other will cover, but I know of a facility that I know I can afford. Plus it's one we represent. It's not my client, but I know the lawyer whose it is."

"You don't mind?" Marcus said incredulous that this man was the same man that only yesterday did not care if his mother lived or died.

"Marcus, I know you make a good living. However, I know that Kate isn't working right now, so let me and Donna take this on. We both make a good salary plus I know the place," Harvey said looking at his brother.

"Thank you Harvey. That's great news that I can take home to Kate. She'll be glad, too. Now we will be down to visit, so I'm not leaving everything to you."

"Glad to hear it. I'll call Dr. Tulane in the morning and get the specifics. All I want you to do until next week when we see you at Markie's Pee Wee Championship is know that I have got it under control and you have nothing to worry about."

"Thank you, Harvey."

Harvey said goodbye to his brother at the airport and then instead of driving all the way back to West Chester knowing that he would be in the office tomorrow, he texted Donna and told him he was going to the condo tonight and that he would see her in the morning. She had wanted to know what happened but she said she would ask him in the morning when she came to the office. Her mother was coming in from her sister's and was going to stay with the children in West Chester. Besides Donna had some unfinished business with the caterer for Rachel's shower and wanted to come into the city by herself. Sergei Patranov had called her late Monday afternoon and they made a lunch date in the city for the next day.

Harvey did not like the sound of her texts, so he called Donna upon reaching his once bachelor pad. The only difference now was there were children's toys in a box in the corner of the living room and flowers on the counter and family pictures everywhere and magnets on the white refrigerator with reminders for appointments, events, and just chores.

"Donna, you don't happen to need a lawyer at your luncheon with the caterer, do you?" Harvey asked a little worried about seeing his wife with another man no matter how business the lunch.

"Harvey, it's a lunch between a client and a caterer. It's no different than when you wine and dine your clients," Donna said nonchalantly. Until Harvey had broached the subject, Donna was not worried. She was not worried for herself because she was Donna and could handle any man. However, she was worried about Harvey. He had made no secret of the difficulties he had seeing his mother again and knowing now that she could die any time. Moreover, Harvey was needy right now (when was he not) but his need manifesting itself in jealously really worried Donna.

"What time should I expect you?"

"The usual time. Why do you need me earlier?"

"Well, if you came in earlier, we could get reacquainted before we hit the office," Harvey invited.

"Darling it sounds lovely, but I am a little tired. The kids absolutely wore me out and I wanted to take as much time before driving in as possible. I can make it up to you," Donna suggested in her more seductive voice.

"Mmmm..." Harvey said as he contemplated. "Your mom said we could have the whole week by ourselves? Isn't Gordon going to miss you?"

"Well, I thought I would go home maybe early on Thursday and then you can come home on Friday and we'll all travel up to Boston for little Markie's football game on Saturday."

"I'll take it. I'll tell you all about mom and the situation when I see you in the morning," Harvey said missing her already. There were not many nights now that Harvey slept alone in his bed. Ever since he and Donna had married he never slept peacefully unless he knew he could look at her sleeping figure lying next to him and her hair sometimes lying on his pillow. He missed her warmth and he missed their desultory talks before drifting off to sleep holding hands or each other.

"Harvey, I love you," Donna said before hanging up.

"I love you, too. I miss you already." Harvey said quietly then hung up.


	8. Chapter 8 - Harvey Who?

Chapter 8

Donna walked into the "Room for a Venue Caterers" and was remarkably on time for her appointment with Sergei the caterer host. Her appointment had been at two in the afternoon and her alarm on her cell phone just pinged two as she opened the door to the caterer's storefront pulling the double stroller with both children sitting quietly (for now ) in it.

"Mrs. Specter, how nice to see you," Sergei said kissing her hand gallantly. Donna thought _OMG over the top isn't he?_ "Thank you. It is nice to put a face to a voice."

Sergei was a nice looking man about Donna's age. He was gallant in manner. He was as tall as Donna and strongly built. Under his suit, Donna thought he probably had some large muscles. He was not exactly her type, but she thought at least she did not have to deal with some smug little woman who had been a spinster and took it out on her clients by seducing them into the most extravagant and expensive outlays.

"These are your children. Oh they are adorable. I can tell this little one is going to be a beauty," he said to Amanda as she glared at the strange man laying his hand on her head. At that moment, Donna swore she saw Harvey's warning glare come from her daughter. Most people said Mandy looked like Donna; however, Donna could see that Amanda had her own red hair and light complexion but she had Harvey's eyes and at that moment Mandy was channeling her father.

Luckily Gordon did not wake up. Donna had just fed him before putting him in the minivan. She knew she had a least a couple of good hours before he woke up famished. The secret to keeping him satisfied for hopefully more than a couple of hours was that she not only fed from the breast but had fed him a couple of baby portions of baby oatmeal. She only hoped it worked because she did not want to have to take time out and feed a crying baby in the middle of the appointment.

Sergei was a man's man. He was known in the catering world as the "catch" for the opposite sex. He was not a homosexual which most people pigeonholed him since he was in the party catering business and unmarried. No matter how delicious looking he was, Sergei whose real name was Samuel Peach not Sergei Patronov was always charming to the female clients and totally masculine in his dealings with the male gender when they were occasioned to need his services. Sergei was taken with Donna from the minute she walked into his offices. She was beautiful with a mane of fiery red hair, porcelain skin lightly brushed with freckles. He loved the fact that Donna was tall, thin, but with a voluptuous bosom and long sensuous legs. Sergei nearly lost his breath while speaking with her and although she wheeled in a two child baby carriage Sergei wanted her from the moment he laid eyes on her. Donna was dressed to the nines today in her Victoria Beckham print dress which accentuated her figure and her best Fendi heels. Mandy looked like a little replica in her own designer dress, white socks and black patent leather Mary Jane shoes. Gordon looked like a little handsome replica of his father with a teeny tiny suit which Donna hoped would remain intact for his church dedication next month.

Sergei helped Donna get the children situated which meant that Mandy had to be taken out of the carriage and placed in a playroom. Donna sat in the playroom with Mandy while she left Gordon in the stroller sound asleep. Luckily he was only a couple of months old. If he woke up all he would do is cry not squirm and fall out of the carriage.

"Now Mrs. Specter, you said your friend's wedding colors were...?"

"They are teal, pale yellow and a light sort of magenta. I would like to have her shower cake frosting striped with those colors and the writing in Magenta. Now about the food itself I was looking over your menu online and I must say you do have quite a variety."

"Yes, I cater all types of parties and all cultures, so I can provide the unusual for any occasion. Let me show you our more extensive party menus." Sergei said as he brought forth his tablet from under the table where they sat.

"Rachel is a foodie, so I am attempting to make this a plethora of her favorite foods," Donna said.

"You are a most loyal friend. Now here's my ultimate package..."

The choices went on forever and since there really was no budget between the bridesmaids, Donna, and Rachel's mother, the sky was the limit. After about an hour, though, Donna's head was spinning, but she had chosen a half Thai cuisine along with some American dishes and a cake which promised to be a large sheet cake with wedding colors and writing saying "Congratulations, Rachel and Mike, December 14, 2017". Sergei was also supplying the liquor and his own bartender which Sergei had thrown in for free. Donna put the down payment on her credit card.

"Thank you, Mrs. Specter, I will collect the balance at the party on November 12th. I must say your friend is most lucky. Your husband is lucky as well."

"Why do you say that?" Donna said while outwardly acknowledging the truth she wanted to hear what Sergei had meant.

"Because his wife is beautiful, friendly, and his children are beautiful and well behaved I must say."

Donna laughed a little and letting Sergei take her hand once more allowed him to kiss it and stroke it slowly.

"Thank you, Sergei. You will contact me to confirm a week before the party, correct? Also you will be there yourself so I can introduce you to Laura Zane, the bride's mother."

"Yes. Surely. Thank you, Mrs. Specter, and have a lovely day."

_ After Donna left, Sergei started working on Rachel's bridal shower. He would be overseeing on the day of the shower and not have one of his assistants work it. He had to see Donna again. He felt he could not get enough of her. She had been flirtatious of a sort and had given him a couple looks of encouragement.

Donna could not have known that Sergei was in pursuit of her. Donna, although happily married to Harvey, was not aware that she had been flirting with a dangerous man. Donna knew how men liked to be handled and her power had not been diminished because she could now add mother to her list of titles. She still had her husband on the hook in and out of the office and she knew firsthand that Harvey was always proud that he could show her off. However, Donna may have not been paying much attention this time as she was concentrating intently on what Rachel's likes and dislikes were and trying to maintain some semblance of attention on her children. Once or twice Donna saw the nasty looks that Mandy gave Sergei, but she just thought it was because the place was not "kid-friendly" and that she had to be put in a corner for most of the afternoon.

Sergei on the other hand with his dark good looks and slight Russian accent (faked) made women swoon the minute he walked into a room. To most people he appeared capable and attentive but to those few for whom he fell hard, he could be demanding and suffocating. The fact that some of these women he pursued and conquered were married mattered little to Sergei as he liked the chase and the catch but cared little for the woman herself. As soon as the husband discovered the affair usually by an oft phone call or gossip leakage, Sergei disappeared into thin air. Never remaining anywhere long enough to either be threatened by a cuckold husband or implicated in a divorce suit. However, Donna was different. She had grabbed Sergei's unbreakable heart along with his erotic thoughts. In time Sergei would see how far he would get in his pursuit of Mrs. Harvey Reginald Specter.

Harvey's time with his mother was not going much better today than yesterday. However, this time Marcus was playing mediator and not letting things get out of hand. Also today being earlier their mother did not just have a chemotherapy treatment. So Lillian Specter was lucid and more than ready for combat.

"Harvey, can I at least see a picture of Amanda and Gordon?"

"Come on, Harvey. You can't really be that hard hearted," begged Marcus.

Harvey looked at Marcus with a quizzical look and then looked back at the pathetic woman lying in the bed. He decided to divorce himself emotionally from the situation and pretend he was dealing with clients. He reached into his suit pocket for his cell phone where many of his impromptu pictures were kept. He just took a couple of snapshots the other day so she would be seeing the most recent. He swiped through some pictures which did not show much but a lot of people for whom needed an explanation. He stopped on their wedding portrait which Harvey shot the other day and wanted to keep close to him. If everyone who knew the cold Harvey Specter knew that he was so sentimental that he kept a picture of his wedding portrait on his phone they would say that they definitely had the wrong guy.

"Here, mom, this isn't the kids but it is Donna and me on our wedding day. I thought you might like to look at that as well."

Gratefully Lillian took the phone from Harvey's grasp and smiled when she saw the portrait.

"Oh you are a beautiful couple, Harvey. Donna is so beautiful and I know she probably doesn't stand any nonsense from you."

"Remember she worked for me ten years before we got married, so yeah, I guess you could say she puts me in my place."

"Lovely."

Lillian handed Harvey's phone back to him and he swiped through some more photos. He finally found one that he snapped of Mandy while she was not paying attention. Mandy was a bit of a ham when she saw a camera around. She had been playing with her kitchen set the other day all dressed up in her little print dress and Mary Jane's. He had called her name and she looked back at her daddy and smiled the cutest smile. Harvey had snapped the picture just in time.

"Here's Amanda Elizabeth Specter all dressed up at almost 19 months old."

When Lillian saw the picture a tear rolled down her cheek. "She's beautiful. She has Donna's coloring, but she has your eyes and she looks just like you at that age."

"You mean you remember back that far?" Harvey had said thinking that his mother had never really given a damn about him.

"Of course, I do, Harvey. You are my firstborn and I still have my memories and pictures of both of you."

Harvey did not think his mom had taken anything with her to remind her of them. Harvey was beginning to think that maybe he had judged his mother too hard. _Nah_ he thought. _She's conniving...just like me. Maybe she's just trying to get me to feel sorry for her...of course._

Lillian handed back the phone to Harvey again.

He swiped one more time to show the picture of Gordon right after his birth. Donna was radiant, tired, and Gordon was asleep on her chest.

"Here's Gordon right after he was born," Harvey said as he handed the phone back one more time to his mother.

"He is so cute. He's what almost three months old now?" Lillian asked.

"Yes, he'll be three months old November 4th."

"Now I've seen their pictures I wish I could see them in person."

Harvey lowered his head in decision. Maybe everyone was right. Maybe he should just break that wall down. It was hard for Harvey because all the emotional walls he had erected had come tumbling down once he hired Mike and then for sure when he married Donna. It was almost his right to keep one wall up and solid.

"I'll think about it. Do you know when you'll be discharged?"

"Do you really want to know, Harvey?" Lillian asked looking at her son. She knew she had made progress but she did not want to push it. She had conversed with Marcus the previous night after he had made it to Harvey's and arrangements were being made for her to stay with Marcus and his family until she died. Lillian would not exactly stay in the same house, but she would stay in a facility that her money or her insurance could afford.

"Of course, I want to know," Harvey said insulted.

"Ok, I am just saying you didn't care before."

"Mom, I think we're getting through to him."

"Watch it Marcus. You'll be driving yourself to the airport tonight," Harvey warned.

It was a surprise to Lillian that Marcus was going home. However, she knew that everyone was busy with their lives. She only hoped that Harvey would not forget she was in the hospital and leave her here without some contact. She had been very lonely since John had died and her latest boyfriend had left her for a younger more, healthy woman.

"Well, please just don't forget I'm in here. I'm sure they will discharge me in a day or so. I can only take so many treatments before my body needs a rest."

Marcus began saying, "I'll talk to...

Harvey jumped in. "We'll talk to the doctor tonight. I'll see when he thinks he'll be discharging you."

Marcus looked at his brother and thought. _Finally.._.

It was now 3 pm. Marcus' plane took off at 7. There was just enough time to get dinner and get him to the airport. Harvey had driven Marcus in himself and let Ray have the entire day off. Harvey would go back to work tomorrow and probably Donna would go in on Wednesday after she had time to pack the kids things for staying at their condo for a few days. Donna's sister, Julia, usually drove their mother in when she stayed at the condo. Once the children were school age and in private school the weekly schedule would be less hectic. It was a good thing that the children were less than two years apart because they would be in school at the same time.

"That's was really nice of you, Harve. I think mom really appreciated it," Marcus said as he and Harvey ate their dinner at Lumiere's a place where Harvey had taken a client or two for dinner. A long time ago Harvey had had a one night stand with one of the younger more attractive hostesses here, however, she had stopped working here a few years ago and once she knew Harvey was off the market she served more tables where the men were good looking but single.

"What do you mean? I just showed the pictures to her. I'm always proud to show off my kids. Just like you," Harvey said pretending that what he did meant nothing.

"Well, it meant a lot to mom. I also liked the way you took charge about talking to the doctor," Marcus continued.

"I was thinking about it. I could hear Donna in the back of my head saying that I should let the walls come down and work things out. Now I know you and mom had this arrangement that once she was discharged that you would find her a hospice up near you. I haven't seen how much of mom's insurance money or other will cover, but I know of a facility that I know I can afford. Plus it's one we represent. It's not my client, but I know the lawyer whose it is."

"You don't mind?" Marcus said incredulous that this man was the same man that only yesterday did not care if his mother lived or died.

"Marcus, I know you make a good living. However, I know that Kate isn't working right now, so let us and Donna take this on. We both make a good salary plus I know the place," Harvey said looking at his brother.

"Thank you Harvey. That's great news that I can take home to Kate. She'll be glad, too. Now we will be down to visit, so I'm not leaving everything to you."

"Glad to hear it. I'll call Dr. Tulane in the morning and get the specifics. All I want you to do until next week when we see you at Markie's Pee Wee Championship is know that I have got it under control and you have nothing to worry about."

"Thank you, Harvey."

Harvey said goodbye to his brother at the airport and then instead of driving all the way back to West Chester knowing that he would be in the office tomorrow, he texted Donna and told her he was going to the condo tonight and that he would see her in the morning. She had wanted to know what happened but she said he said he would tell when she came to the office. Her mother was coming in from her sister's and was going to stay with the children in West Chester. Besides Donna had some unfinished business with the caterer for Rachel's shower and wanted to come into the city by herself. Sergei Patranov had called her late Monday afternoon and they made a lunch date in the city for the next day.

Harvey did not like the sound of her texts, so he called Donna upon reaching his once bachelor pad. The only difference now was there were children's toys in a box in the corner of the living room and flowers on the counter and family pictures everywhere and magnets on the white refrigerator with reminders for appointments, events, and just chores.

"Donna, you don't happen to need a lawyer at your luncheon with the caterer, do you?" Harvey asked a little worried about seeing his wife with another man no matter how business the lunch.

"Harvey, it's a lunch between a client and a caterer. It's no different than when you wine and dine your clients," Donna said nonchalantly. Until Harvey had broached the subject, Donna was not worried. She was not worried for herself because she was Donna and could handle any man. However, she was worried about Harvey. He had made no secret of the difficulties he had seeing his mother again and knowing now that she could die any time. Moreover, Harvey was needy right now (when was he not) but his need manifesting itself in jealously really worried Donna.

"What time should I expect you?"

"The usual time. Why do you need me earlier?"

"Well, if you came in earlier, we could get reacquainted here before we hit the office," Harvey invited seductively.

"Darling it sounds lovely, but I am a little tired. The kids absolutely wore me out and I wanted to take as much time before driving in as possible. I can make it up to you," Donna suggested in a more sultry voice.

"Mmmm..." Harvey said as he contemplated. "Your mom said we could have the whole week by ourselves? Isn't Gordon going to miss you?"

"Well, I thought I would go home maybe early on Thursday and then you can come home on Friday and we'll all travel up to Boston for little Markie's football game on Saturday."

"I'll take it. I'll tell you all about mom and the situation when I see you in the morning," Harvey said missing her already. There were not many nights now that Harvey slept alone in his bed. Ever since he and Donna had married he never slept peacefully unless he knew he could look at her sleeping figure lying next to him and her hair sometimes lying on his pillow. He missed her warmth and he missed their desultory talks before drifting off to sleep holding hands or each other.

"Harvey, I love you," Donna said before hanging up.

"I love you, too. I miss you already." Harvey said quietly then hung up.


	9. Chapter 9 - A Wall Comes Down

CHAPTER 9

"He was practically kissing you on the mouth, Donna!" Harvey shouted at his wife whose face wore a guilty expression.

"Oh he was not," Donna responded quietly. "He tripped on something on the floor and accidentally crashed into me."

"With his mouth open?" Harvey shouted back.

They were at Rachel's bridal shower. The time for eating had finally arrived so the men and their significant others became reattached to one another while they stood in line waiting for food at the large buffet table spread out in the Zane's mansion kitchen. The house was made of stone and brick and inside the kitchen felt like a cave. It opened off the side to a large terrace in the backyard. The back of the room down two steps was the large family room with a TV, fireplace, Baby Grand Piano and lots and lots of books. It was the room where Rachel had just finished opening her gifts and Mike stood by taking jabs and jokes from mostly people he never met or would meet once he was Rachel's husband.

Donna on the other hand was acting as part hostess so she had not left Sergei Patranov's side much during the whole serving of the meal. Sergie had acted the gentleman for the most part in his private meetings with Donna but he continued to kiss her hand and looking down her blouse. Once his hand even (accidentally) brushed one of her breasts. Donna did not think it was on purpose until this little incident to which her husband referred happened.

When Harvey spotted her, he had been one of the last to enter the kitchen to get food as he had been having a heated discussion with Robert Zane and Bryant Hilliard a lawyer of whom Harvey had known by reputation only but apparently was a good friend of Robert Zane's. As Harvey came through to the kitchen and picked up a china plate, he caught the swift maneuver of Patranov's to accidentally trip into his wife's cleavage and then come up quick to snatch her lips. Harvey could not blame the man. Donna was one of the most beautiful women in the whole place. She was dressed in a silver Alexander McQueen dress with a low neckline and her favorite gray Jimmy Choo heels. Her red fiery hair was up and still looked luxurious from the hormones still trickling through her body from nursing Gordon. However, what was Harvey's was Harvey and no one takes anything from him especially his wife.

"Excuse me, I need to talk to my wife," Harvey said to Sergei putting down the plate and grabbing Donna's arm pulled her into the small alcove next to the kitchen leading to the broom closet.

"Donna. What the hell was that?" Harvey said with a clenched jaw and almost literal steam emanating from his forehead.

"What was what? Ow...let go of my arm, Specter," Donna said not liking the accusatory tone of her husband's voice. She enjoyed Harvey's possessiveness over her most of the time especially since they had become a couple but this was not just Harvey's possessiveness it sounded like he was jealous of something.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, but what the hell was that? He was practically kissing you on the mouth, Donna!

"Oh he was not," Donna responded quietly. "He tripped on something on the floor and accidentally crashed into me."

"With his mouth open?" Harvey shouted back.

"Would you keep your voice down?" Donna stage whispered back. The last thing she needed was to cause a scene at Rachel's shower. As matron of honor she had enough responsibility, she did not need "gossip grabber of the party" on top of it.

"Don't worry, Harvey, after today, neither you or I will ever see him again. Calm down. It was nothing."

"Ok, but if he tries to touch you one more time and I see it, I won't be responsible for my behavior."

Harvey calmed down and kissed his wife on the cheek and smiled.

"You know I don't blame the guy. I'm the lucky guy who gets to go home with you."

Donna smirked. "What can I say...I'm Donna. Every woman wants to be me and every guy wants to be with me. You never know, I might change my mind one of these days and leave you high and dry."

"Not funny," Harvey said seriously.

Then Donna remembered that was exactly what Harvey's mother had done all those years ago.

"I'm sorry, Harvey, but you were asking for it," Donna joked trying to lighten his mood.

Harvey raised his head and looked up at his wife. "It's ok. Because I know you'd never leave me." They then shared a swift but thorough kiss.

They came out of the alcove together only to be accosted by the cause of the problem facing them.

"Pardon me, I was just trying to find Donna to see when I should serve the cake. The appetizers and Ms. Zane opening her gifts took longer than anticipated and I do not want the cake to be ruined as it is partially frozen."

"Her name is Mrs. Specter to you...not Donna. You're the caterer you make the judgment on when to serve the cake and if I ever see you make a pass at my wife again I will hurt you" Harvey threatened looking deep into Sergei's eyes. Harvey and Sergei were of a height but Harvey the more fearsome for he never threatened without being able to support it.

As for Sergei, he had Donna right where he wanted her. She knew her husband was overreacting, but Sergei had expected that Donna's husband was no pushover. Donna was no pushover either for that matter. How Sergei would contrive to see Donna Specter on a regular basis from now on was going to be an intriguing puzzle for Sergei to solve.

"Thank you for the loveliest shower I have ever been to. Then again I may be a little prejudice as it was mine," Rachel said as she helped Donna wrap up some of the leftover foodstuffs. The crowd was large but Sergei had outdone himself because there were still three trays of Thai noodles and one tray of Swedish meatballs still untouched.

"Why don't you and Harvey take a tray of the Thai noodles home? Mike isn't a big fan of Thai cuisine."

"Well, Harvey isn't much of a fan either. However, he did seem attached to these noodles. Thanks, Rache. I appreciate it."

Rachel took the wrapped tray of food and taking a piece of masking tape and permanent marker wrote "Donna" on the tape and stuck on the cover of the tray. This way her father would not sneak it open later for a midnight snack.

Rachel looked up at the taller woman and said, "Do you want to tell me what Harvey was yelling about at you during dinner?"

Donna knew someone had heard. She knew it had been noisy but Harvey as a lawyer had all the capability needed for making himself heard in and out of a courtroom. Although this was not a court room this room was no exception.

"Just a misunderstanding he had with me and Sergei," Donna tried to make the incident as small as it was to her.

"I'm thinkin' he didn't like the way Sergei oggled you the whole day and then accidentally tried to kiss you," Rachel said biting her lip.

"It wasn't that, Rachel. Sergei tripped... Oh hell, even I don't believe that excuse anymore," Donna said sighing heavily. She wiped a stray hair from her forehead with the back of her hand. The motion caught Rachel's eye because it was Donna's left hand where she sported the sizeable engagement ring Harvey had given to her when they became engaged. The ring sparkled in the dimmed kitchen light.

Donna looked down at her wedding rings. She had barely taken them off since they had married almost three years ago. Donna could only remember that during her pregnancies were the only time that her rings became tight almost unbearable. However, Donna, had even then never removed her wedding rings. They meant the life she had now. The life she shared with Harvey.

"You know it wouldn't be so hard except that Harvey is finally accepting his mom after all these years and I don't think it's just because she's dying, " Donna confided to Rachel.

"That's wonderful, Donna. Be careful, though. You are a man magnet and Harvey knows that."

"Rachel. Nothing or no one could drag me away from him. We have a family now. I'm happy. No one will ever take that from me or Harvey." Donna responded fiercely.

"Good. Now I have to find my fiancé before he goes home with the wrong girl."

"I hope you're driving. Mike looks like he's about ready to fall down," Donna said as she pointed to Mike leaning against the wall talking to Harvey. She laughed as she saw Harvey's hand raised to keep Mike from falling face first into the stone tile of his future in-laws' kitchen.

Harvey drove back to West Chester holding Donna's hand in his most of the trip. They took the Audi with the automatic transmission so Harvey did not have to shift gears while trying to maintain contact with his wife.

"Wow what a week!"

Donna rubbed her thumb over Harvey's knuckles.

"That's for sure. What time did you tell your mother we would visit? I want to make sure that both children are all cleaned up for their grandmother."

"Yeah, about that. I was thinking maybe I'll just go tomorrow. You know it's Sunday and we have work on Monday."

"Harvey. Your mother is looking forward to finally meeting her grandchildren. Don't let what happened today influence your thoughts on tomorrow."

"Well, it has. I can't get the image of Sergei practically falling into your cleavage and all you did was encourage him."

Donna released Harvey's hand hard. She turned as best she could in the passenger seat to look at him.

"I did not. I was doing a little innocent flirting. I'm a married woman with children. I don't get that kind of reaction much anymore." Then more quietly, Donna said resignedly, "Harvey nothing happened. Nothing will ever happen. I am not your mother. I am Donna. I am your wife! I could never do to you or our children what your mother did to you and your brother. You're just now beginning to see how heartbroken she really was by her mistake. Don't let this fester by making another mistake."

Harvey shook his head and stared at the traffic in front of him. It was only 9:00 pm, but the shower had been an all-day event and he was very tired.

"Ok. You're right, Donna. You are not my mother. I would never expect you to leave me, but I can't get that picture of Sergei out of my mind. It just burns me up because it dredges up all that I wanted to leave in the past. I'm not sure if I have forgiven her enough in order for her to see the kids. But I had better never catch you speaking with or even talking to Sergei Patranov again or I won't be responsible for my actions."

"Harvey, I still don't get your attitude. Your mother is not a fungus filled disease that's contagious. She is your mother and whether you believe it or not she loves you. The children are not going to catch an infidelity disease because they will be in the same room and close proximity to her. You're being ridiculous, Harvey. Besides, Mandy is very excited about meeting her "new" grandma. If we decide to not go through with our original plan, she may wind up with a complex. Besides if all you're worried about is me seeing Sergei again. I guarantee that won't happen. My matron of honor duties are drawing to a forward conclusion. I will not be seeing him again anyway because I have no reason to. He was paid before he left and we're done."

"Good to know. How about we stop for something to eat?"

Donna just rolled her eyes.

Despite what Harvey had told Donna he took advantage of the fact that Amanda had caught a cold and would not be allowed to see her grandmother as her immunity was compromised from the chemo.

Amanda howled at the thought that she could not be with her daddy today. She knew she was sick, but daddy never minded any other time. So Donna who was not in a good mood because she would be alone yet again with the children on the day before she returned to work, told Harvey to kindly explain to his daughter why her father was leaving her again.

"Mandy, calm down sweetie, daddy will be back later and then we can play kitchen again, ok," Harvey tried to placate his little daughter has he held her in his arms and walked around with her. "Your Grandma Specter is very sick and you're a very sick little girl right now, so it's not a good idea for you and your Grandma to see each other. I promise as soon as you're not running a temperature and all better you can meet Grandma Specter, ok?" Harvey looked into those large brown eyes so like his. She was still shuddering from how hard she cried that her daddy was leaving her again.

"Ok, Mandy?" Harvey asked kissing her on the cheek.

Mandy just looked into her daddy's face with big red rimmed brown eyes and her finger in her mouth. She nodded, but as soon as Harvey put her down she clung to his leg and would not let go.

"Donna! I need you!" Harvey called from the living room of the house. He assumed Donna was feeding Gordon or taking a shower.

"Donna!" Then he heard Gordon's loud wail from the foyer where Amanda was still holding his leg in a death grip.

Donna finally came out with red hair all messed; the baby in her arms who had quieted as soon as he knew he was in his mom's arms.

"Good job, Specter. Can't you see she doesn't want you to leave without her again? You promised and now you've reneged. Congratulations for breaking your daughter's heart! "

"No need for your sarcasm this early. I really need to leave and I can't leave with my almost two year old daughter clinging to me!"

"Let me put the baby down. Give me a minute," Donna said trouncing with babe in arms over to the bassinet and gently put her baby son down on his side.

"Come on, Mandy. That's enough. Daddy will be back before you know it. He promised he would play with you all day tomorrow didn't he?" Donna said sneaking an eye contact with Harvey who violently shook his head back and forth. He did not need Donna making promises for things he may not be able to keep.

With a kiss on the cheeks of his daughter and wife, Harvey Specter made it out of the door of his West Chester house en route to a woman for whom he thought he would never care this much again.

In the meantime, Donna sat on the floor and fed Gordon from her breast as she did not feel like venturing into the kitchen and finding a bottle. Besides she did enjoy feeling his little hand curled on her breast and his little face contented as he took nourishment. As she looked lovingly on her baby son, her daughter came and brushed her red hair away from her shoulder gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"You really miss daddy when he's not here, don't you?" Donna asked Mandy as she plopped down next to Donna and mimicked feeding her baby doll like her mother fed her brother.

Mandy nodded up and down and continued to feed her baby while Donna fed Gordon.

"I know. I miss him, too."

Donna then had an idea. She said to Mandy who was busy burping her baby doll mimicking Donna's motions with Gordon. "I know. It's daddy's birthday in a couple of months Do you want to plan a birthday party for him?" Donna asked her daughter with wide eyes and a big smile.

"Daddy's birthday, yes... Ahchoo," Mandy said sneezing at the end. Before Donna could fish a tissue out of her robe pocket Mandy had already wiped her nose on the sleeve of her bathrobe.

"Well, there goes my peaceful day..." Donna said as she rose with Gordon still hooked to her breast in search of a tissue.

_ The thought of using Sergei's firm was not intentional but Donna did not have the time with the holidays and the wedding before Harvey's birthday to do any additional research for a better caterer. She wanted to throw a real big occasion for Harvey's birthday. It was a big one. He would be 45 years old. He knew she knew how old he was but he did not want anyone else knowing. Out of love for her husband's fragile ego, she would not announce what birthday it was just that it was his birthday and she wanted to celebrate it with both sides of the family and their close friends. It really did not amount to having the affair catered but she thought of Sergei and since he did a great job on a large party she was eager to see what he could do for a somewhat smaller less diverse crowd of people. Donna's only hope was that Sergei himself would not be serving the food. There would be no need. Servers were not necessary at such a small affair. Meeting with Sergei once to choose the menu and pay the cost should be enough. She really wanted no repeat of her and Sergei's last meeting. All Donna only needed the food. She realized for all of Sergei's womanizing tricks he was a good caterer and the cost would be perfect as well. Her family and Harvey's were not that large and they all had children so a less diverse palate should also mean less expense.

Harvey's birthday was in the middle of January, so there would be time to recover from Christmas and Rachel and Mike's wedding.

After she had Gordon back down for a mini-nap and Mandy settled in bed asleep trying to get better from her cold, Donna called "Room for A Venue".

"Room for a Venue, Peggy speaking, how may I direct your call?"

"Hi Peggy. This is Donna Specter. Can I speak with Sergei, please?"

"He is with a client at the moment. Can I have your number and have him call you back?"

"Oh. Yes, of course.." Donna gave Peggy her cell number and the house phone in the event she could not get to her cell.

"Peggy, I don't mean to be pushy but I am calling between nap and feeding times for my children. Could you perhaps know how long he will be with this client?"

"She's been here since 8:00 am, Mrs. Specter. I assume he won't be much longer. Probably another 15 minutes. I will give him your message and let him know to urgently call you back."

Donna did not want to sound desperate, but she knew if she did not get this done today there would not be too much time and then nothing would get done at all for Harvey's birthday.

"Ok. That would be great. Thank you."

Harvey arrived at the hospice with flowers for his mother. He did not know why he felt compelled to buy flowers for his mother. Perhaps, Harvey was feeling bad because he could not bring the kids to see their grandmother. He knew his mother would be disappointed. She had been counting on this for a week. However, he could not complicate his mother's already debilitated condition by exposure to the common cold.

As Harvey entered the facility he looked at the familiar walls, he was here when Mike had decided to represent the hospice in their legal affairs. Mike and his constant sympathies, Harvey thought, would someday undo all the corporate wealth that Pearson, Specter, Litt represented. Still, Harvey was glad in a way because at least he would have someone accountable in case anything happened. Harvey checked in at the desk and was told his mother had just finished her breakfast and was waiting to see him.

Harvey came to her room marked B206. Harvey took a minute to remember the significance of "206" and smiled.

"Mom," Harvey said as he walked toward the table where his mother was sitting. She looked all pretty for his visit today and then he remembered that she was all dressed up to see her grandchildren.

"Harvey," Lillian said as she took the flowers that Harvey proffered. "These are beautiful. Are you alone?"

"Well, mom..." Harvey began as he sat down on the bed across from her. He had forgotten to shave and his beard was starting to show darkly. He dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt over which he wore a leather bomber jacket.

"You changed your mind, didn't you, Harvey," Lillian said as tears welled up in her large brown eyes.

"No, mom, I didn't. Amanda caught a cold from one of the neighbor's kids and I didn't think your immunity could handle not catching it. Believe me she was as disappointed as you. She clung to my leg and wouldn't let me leave. If it weren't for Donna I wouldn't've made it this far." Harvey smiled and kissed his mom's frail cheek.

"I promise as soon as Amanda's better I will bring her and Gordon to see you."

"How's Donna?"

"She's good. She wishes she could come see you, but we depend so much on her mother right now that we like to give her a break on the weekends."

"Donna's mom babysits while you and Donna work in Manhattan?"

"She just sitting with the kids until Gordon is about six months old. Then Donna feels that the daycare can handle a baby that old. We did that with Amanda. Did I ever tell you about Amanda's birth?"

"No, Harvey. Please tell me.."

Suddenly it was like Harvey was a little boy again before he realized that his mom had cheated on his father for years. Harvey proceeded to tell his mom about how he wound up with Donna, their wedding, the births of both kids and how Donna and Mandy were so sick and that was how they found out they were having Gordon. He talked about his career and the one previous when he worked at the DA's office. Harvey felt light as a feather when he was finished.

"Harvey, do you believe it's 3:00 pm. I'm going to have to take another shot. They make me so sleepy. I'm so glad you opened up to me. I have always been curious about your career despite the news that Marcus relays to me."

"Mom, it's strange. You made me feel like someone's son again. I haven't felt like that since dad was alive," Harvey rose and embraced his mother. He actually ran a hand across his eyes as unbidden tears began to fall.

When they disengaged themselves from one another, Lillian still had a small clasp on each of Harvey's upper arms.

"Now you are going to come back as soon as Mandy's well, right? You won't let me down."

"No. I promise mom as soon as Mandy's over her cold. All four of us will be here with bells on."

"I love you, Harvey." Lillian said as she watched Harvey walk out the door.

A small voice inside Harvey's head, wherein Harvey was the only who could hear it, said, "I forgive you, mom."


	10. Chapter 10 - Deceit

Chapter 10

Harvey pulled into his driveway around dinner time after visiting his mother in the hospice. He had a couple of hours to kill and he thought he would stop at the office and see if he could rethink a position on a corporation who had planned to raid a few companies within the next few months. Rizzlin Pharmaceuticals was a large corporation that Harvey had culled as his personal client several years ago. Since then it had grown into a conglomerate with opening of different subsidiaries in three different countries. The latest scheme involved his old rival Jonathan Sidwell for whom Mike had once worked. Harvey thought offhand that he would give Rachel the lead on this since she seemed to have more of stomach when it came to corporate raiding than Mike. Rachel's future husband tended to think with his heart instead of his head. As a fifth year associate that was not a good play for Mike's future. However, between the two of them Rachel had cunning and smarts and Mike had that eidetic memory and a heart so whatever one had the other lacked. Harvey sometimes despaired that he had one good associate between the two.

As he came through the door he shouted that old sarcastic phrase "Hi Honey, I'm home." Expecting to see and hear his family either noisily eating dinner or playing in the living room as he rounded the corner from the foyer, Harvey was surprised that the house was dark and a note in Donna's handwriting had been left with a magnet on the refrigerator.

 _Couldn't reach you. I had to run an errand in town. I'm late because the kids woke up from their naps late._

 _However, dinner is cooked and ready to be reheated in the oven. We'll eat with you when we arrive home._

 _Love, Donna._

Harvey decided to wait until Donna and the kids were home. He was not one to want to eat alone anymore. He enjoyed eating with Donna and sometimes with both children. Gordon was usually fed while Donna guided Mandy to eat and in between they would discuss homey things like improvements on their house or whether or not Harvey should sell his condo in Manhattan. Sometimes they would discuss issues from the office that popped up. Their dinner conversations were always interesting to them not necessarily anyone else but between Harvey and Donna and most times Mandy they were what made life worthwhile.

Harvey was turning from the message on the refrigerator and leaned against the counter. He spotted Donna's address book open wherein a recent entry had been scrawled in Donna's handwriting. Her hard copy address book always duplicated her personal directory in her phone. That was just who she was. Always prepared and always able to retrieve something in a few minutes after a request or before the request was made. Harvey looked twice at the entry and it happened to have two numbers: one for the "Room for a Venue" firm number and the other for Sergei Patronov's cell number. Harvey could not think why Donna was calling this person since Rachel's shower had been celebrated over a week ago. He could not think of any other reason for a caterer in the near future since Rachel and Mike's wedding caterer was someone that Rachel and Mike had chosen over a year ago. Remembering the last occasion where Sergei's tongue almost landed in his wife's mouth, Harvey started to fume. He pushed the contact button on Donna's phone to see where the hell she was and why she was contacting Sergei I-want-your-wife Patronov.

"Hi Honey, are you..."

"Where are you, Donna?"

"I'm on the way home. I was lucky to get a doctor's appointment today at the Urgent Clinic. I didn't want to fool around with Mandy's congestion. Her temperature shot up a couple of hours after you left. Of course, I had to bring Gordon with me. Why do you sound so hostile?"

"Is Mandy ok?" Harvey asked concern for his daughter's health overriding his need to know what his wife was doing calling an all-out womanizer.

"Yes. She's fine. The doctor gave me a prescription for an antibiotic. It should prevent Gordon from catching it also. I was also concerned since he is still so little. Harvey what's wrong?"

"By the way, are you driving?"

"Yes, but my cell phone is programmed to the minivan, remember?"

Harvey coming down off his hostility for a moment said, "Yes, I forgot. Sorry. I was just worried because no one was here."

"I left you a note. I tried to make it sound light so you wouldn't worry. How's your mother?"

"How come you couldn't reach me...:

"You have to turn your cell off when you go into the hospice, remember? You forgot to turn it back on obviously before you left."

"I stopped at the office for a few minutes. You didn't think to try there?"

"Yes, I did but it must have been before or after you were there because you never pick up your phone unless I have screened your calls first, remember?"

Harvey did remember suddenly. He never did understand how that stupid phone service worked at the office. Whenever Donna was not there to screen a call, he would simply pick up the phone and cut off the person on the other end. As for actually answering his outside line, he was way too far up the food chain in the firm to even think of doing that.

"I'm sorry. I forgot. How far away are you?"

"Just pulling up in the driveway now. Come out to the garage and you can carry one of your sleeping children into the house," Donna said as she hung up the phone and spotted her husband in the doorway between garage and Harvey's man cave. She smiled as he came to the door of the vehicle. Donna had pushed the automatic open door button and Harvey quietly unbuckled Mandy's car seat and carefully picked her up and carried into the house. Donna got out from the driver's seat and unbuckled Gordon in his little car seat and carried him in her arms into the house almost forgetting the huge baby bag sitting on the floor in front of him.

It was a quiet dinner although Donna had asked questions about the visit to the hospice. Harvey was unusually quiet and did not say much. Donna could not remember the last time she had not possessed the ability to get Harvey to talk. Since they had married she had become even more adept at drawing conversation from him. However, tonight's quiet solitude had been odd at that.

Two weeks later there was still a small but solid wall between Donna and Harvey. It had not affected their work or interfered with the care of their children. The place where it showed the most was in the bedroom. Granted they had not made love much since Gordon had been born, but that was normal. They now had two children and still had full time jobs. Harvey had given it a half-hearted try because he still loved and wanted his wife but every attempt seemed to him futile as he thought his wife may have been involved with another man. Instead of lying in each other's arms afterward and contentedly trying to sleep until Gordon awoke, Harvey would kiss Donna on the forehead and turn over and go to sleep. Of course the intensity of lovemaking may wane as years passed and children came along, but a couple like Harvey and Donna, two passionate people, especially about each other was somewhat odd at this early stage in their marriage. It had not just been the address book in the past two weeks that caused Harvey's suspicions to grow, but he had noticed that Donna had been taking secretive phone calls and when noticing him come into the room or come out of his office, her voice would take on a different tone and she would hang up almost instantly. Donna felt badly about keeping the birthday surprise from her husband but she thought that if he could hold on long enough the trouble would be worth it.

Fortunately, no one on the outside could really tell any difference in their relationship. Donna's mother came to the house in West Chester from her house in Connecticut and stayed with Donna's sister, Carol, as usual. Then on Friday night after Donna was let out of the office to return home, Carol's sister picked up their mother and let her make the long drive back to Connecticut.

Harvey had twice wanted to ask Donna about the phone number he saw in her address book but decided that if Donna had something to tell him she would come out and say it. He had always trusted her in everything. He tried very hard to extend that trust even now, but the sight of that phone number and what had occurred at Rachel's shower still reverberated through Harvey's head. Donna's odd behavior while being on the phone at times was not helping Harvey's disposition any better.

Thanksgiving was in two days and as a treat they were being allowed to bring Lillian out of the hospice to share dinner with them. Dr. Tulane had stopped her treatments some weeks ago and felt her immunity was strong enough now to withstand a small familial crowd of people. Harvey assured Dr. Tulane that only his brother, his sister-in-law, and children as well as Harvey's own family would be present at the dinner. Donna's family decided to go out for the dinner with Uncle Jake and his family.

The Wednesday before Thanksgiving was all hustle and bustle. Donna was taking the two days off that Pearson, Specter, Litt offered Thanksgiving and Black Friday; however, she knew that Harvey had wanted to work. She had confirmed all his appointments for Friday and had taken home draft after draft and typed between Gordon's feedings. As she brought his schedule and completed papers into him as he sat at his desk, Harvey's hand came out to stop her.

"Harvey!"

"Donna, we need to talk."

"Now? Can it not wait until we're home? I still have three summaries to type before we go home tonight. You know Thanksgiving dinner doesn't cook itself and you have to pick your mother up in the morning."

"You have a point. Ok. Let's wait until later."

Donna walked away and thought how strange Harvey's behavior had been and still was. He had never the whole time she had ever worked for him reached out to her and grabbed her hand as if he did not want her to touch something.

Finally, Donna proudly finished typing the last summary, edited it, and then sent it to Harvey's email to change or reread for changes.

"Donna!"

"Yes, Harvey," Donna came in brushing her hair away from her forehead with her hand. "Do you need me to change something?"

"Yes, I notated the edits. They are all on the same summary. I changed my argument. After you finish retyping that one, call Ray and he can take you home."

"Why? Aren't you coming home? It's Thanksgiving tomorrow."

Harvey looked up at her like she had not been his wife for the last three years. "I'm not coming home to West Chester tonight. I'll have Ray drive me to the condo since I have to pick mom up anyway from the hospice. I'll come home tomorrow with mom and then we will have Thanksgiving."

Donna looked back at him like he had grown four heads.

"Harvey," Donna said sternly. "What are you talking about? None of the cars are parked at the condo's garage, are they?"

"The Audi is. I drove it here last week after I was at court on Monday."

"You didn't think to tell me this was your plan. I had hoped you would be home tonight and tomorrow to help me prep the house or watch the kids while I prepped the house for company and dinner. You did remember your brother and his family are staying with us over the weekend. That means we have two children, four adults, and two babies plus when your mother comes an older person who is part invalid."

"My mother is perfectly fine. Besides Marcus and I will see to her needs and Kate can help you in the kitchen on Thursday." Harvey looked at Donna like she was not thinking with that fabulous brain of hers.

Donna sighed audibly. "Ok, Harvey. Have it your way. I will finish up this summary send it back to you for final review and then I'm outta here."

"Ok, go ahead and call Ray. Tell him to come back after he has dropped you off and tell him to come back get me to just drive me uptown."

Donna just saluted and walked back to her desk. She could not figure her husband's behavior, but she was slowly becoming aggravated at his unconcern about her and the kids. Shades of the old the-world-revolves-around-me Harvey Specter was beginning to come through the cracks and it made Donna feel very, very uncomfortable.

"Donna?" A heavily Russian accented male voice said on the other end.

"No, this is her husband," answered Harvey. He had taken Donna's phone surreptitiously during the day and decided now that she had left the office for the weekend to call this son of a bitch. He refused to be cuckold by such a louse of a person as this man.

"Oh, Mr. Specter," said Sergei. "Did you want to talk about the party arrangements or something else?"

"Party arrangements?" Harvey asked. He had no clue of what this ignoramus was speaking.

"Oh, probably not then..." Sergei said awkwardly. He really did not want to let his client's cat out of the bag. Besides his plan to get Donna in his own clutches had still not come to fruition.

"No I was just wondering whose number this was in my wife's phone. She didn't have a contact name attached to it so I was curious. You know she is also my secretary and has been for a long time so I thought maybe it had been an old client's number. I'm a lawyer. I bet she didn't mention that."

"No, she did. What can I do for you?"

"Nothing. How long have you been seeing my wife?" Harvey asked finally wanting to cut through the subtleties and bull doze his way right to the point.

"I think Mrs. Specter should be the one to tell you, sir," Sergei said standing up to Harvey and although he was uncomfortable he wanted to show his loyalty to Donna his client.

"So you're not going to tell me anything, are you?" Harvey said.

"No, Mrs. Specter is a client and she has asked me to keep certain items to myself." Sergei was not a man who caved easily. He had his pride just like the man on the other end of the line.

"Ok, Sergei, I will let you off the hook this time. However, if I catch you or my wife speaking to you, I will hunt your ass down and hurt you. You got it?" Harvey menacingly said and then hung up slamming Donna's phone on his desk.

After Harvey hung up, he just sat and fumed. He looked up finally when Mike had breezed into his office.

"So Harvey why haven't you left? I saw Donna leave a couple of hours ago. You need a ride?"

"Mike? I thought you'd be off to Zane world with Rachel getting ready for the big Thanksgiving shindig at her father's house."

"Shindig? Nobody says that anymore. Anyway what are you talking about? Rachel said it was just the family."

"Oh, I guess you were too drunk at the shower to know that Rachel has three aunts and two uncles on her father's side alone. Her mother has three sisters and a brother. Why do you think there were so many people at the shower?"

"I thought they were mostly Rachel's friends from college and law school."

"Naaa," Harvey quipped. "Wrong, but thank you for playing."

"Oh well. I can handle it."

"Sure you can..."

"Not to change the subject, but you still haven't said why you're still here after your wife left hours ago. I thought maybe you gave Ray the night off and needed a ride."

"Let's just say I had some research to finish." Harvey said eyeing the younger man with a look that brooked no further investigation.

"Oh, ok. Do you still need help? I came in here because I wanted to give you the files I finished for you and the arguments for court next week. I have Rachel's summations here for you, too. She has one more thing to finish and then we were going to go home. Being you're still here, do you want come over for a drink? I can take you back to the condo, if you want."

Harvey smiled. "No, that's ok. Thank you, anyway, Mike and thank Rachel for me, too. I assume the last summations are for me?

Mike nodded.

"Tell her to knock off. She can finish them on Monday. Go have a happy first engaged Thanksgiving together."

Harvey came around from the back of his desk and shook Mike's hand.

"Happy Thanksgiving," Harvey said as they shook hands.

"Happy Thanksgiving, Harvey. Give Donna my love and kiss the kids for us."

"Will do."

Mike left Harvey's office and Harvey resumed his fuming.

Five minutes after Sergei hung up with Harvey, Donna received a call on her home phone.

"Mrs. Specter...Donna?"

"Sergei? What's going on? Did I forget to give you the deposit for Harvey's party?"

"No, I just had some other things to discuss with you. I just booked a new chef who has some new food choices that have suddenly popped up on the menu. I wanted you to sample them."

"So can I come next week?" Donna asked knowing that this week was totally shot with Harvey's family staying in their home.

"I really want you to come Friday. The chef will only be here a short while and I really think you would like his selections."

"Sergei, look, I appreciate it, but I am not going into the city on Friday. My husband's family is coming for the holiday tomorrow and I have a million things to prepare besides I need to be here."

"It will only take two hours at the most, Donna. Can your husband not take care of things for that long?"

Donna laughed to herself and said in a small voice, "If you knew how helpless my husband really is..."

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Tell you what. I will come Friday but it's going to have be around 9:00 am. I will have most of my morning chores completed by then and can hand off the kids to my husband for a couple of hours."

"Oh, that's fine. Just prepare yourself. Don't eat too much of Thanksgiving then you'll have no room for samples of the new dishes."

"Thank you, Sergei." Donna hung up the kitchen phone and then went to see Gordon as he was in need of a diaper change.

Harvey stood in front of the bedroom window. It afforded the same beautiful top city view as his living room did. He stood in front of it with a glass of scotch in his hand. Since he married a couple of years ago, it seemed that he had lost his taste for the usual stiff drink. He and Donna had been so happy and culminating with the births of their children more than happily happy if that's possible. Harvey loved Donna so much and loved being a father. He had been scared of everything at first as Donna had always known. However, he knew that as long as he was with her he could do anything and be anything. Now as he stood and looked at the cityscape the old "never let them know you care" Harvey started to creep into his heart. He only had a half suspicion that Donna was seeing Sergei behind his back. The logical part of Harvey kept telling him that she would never abandon him or cheat on him in such a way. She knew what it had taken for Harvey to break his walls down and let her in completely.

Harvey decided to go to bed because he had to pick up his mother rather early from the hospice and be sure to have her back in time so she would not miss her nightly medications. He stripped to his boxers and t-shirt and rolled down the covers. He lay on his side of the bed and just looked at Donna's side of the bed where she normally lay beside him. He really hated sleeping alone now. He thought it had been bad when he was single. It really hurt now that he had gotten used to have the same woman warming his bed for him every night. He wandered to Donna's side and could still smell her shampoo on her pillow and her perfume between the sheets on her side. His mind was fuzzy on when was the last time they had made love in this bed. On an odd note of melancholy, Harvey retrieved his cell phone from the nightstand and dialed Donna's phone. Suddenly he did not care it was after 10:00 pm on a weeknight and their children probably put up a fuss before going to bed. Donna was still breastfeeding and working full time so she did expend a lot of energy in that respect. However, Harvey was not thinking of that. He only wanted to talk to his wife.

"Donna?" Harvey said into his phone.

"Harvey? Are you ok?" Donna answered sleepily but surprised to hear her husband's voice over the phone this late. He knew that the children wore her out.

"Yes," he said softly. "I just want to apologize for earlier. I'm sorry I'm not there to help."

"Oh, it's ok. You know me. I'm Donna. I can do everything," Donna said with a little hiccup of a laugh.

"I miss you, Donna," Harvey said softly into the phone.

"Well, I will see you tomorrow. Then you don't have to miss me anymore. By the way, can you stay with the kids for a couple of hours on Friday morning? I have to go into the city and take care of something."

"What? Something for Rachel and Mike's wedding?"

Donna decided if lying at this point would be a wise choice. She hated lying especially to her husband. In this case, however, it was to his benefit so Donna decided to fib this one time.

"Yes, my dress needs to be taken in again and it is at Rachel's mother's house. So I need to stop there, get my dress and then head to the seamstress."

Harvey thought this a plausible duty as the wedding was only weeks away. He also had been told that the matron of honor and the bridesmaids were preparing for the wedding at Rachel's parents' house which made sense why Donna's gown would be there.

"I suppose so. Well, I just wanted to apologize and tell you goodnight. I love you." Harvey said before hanging up the phone.

"I love you, too, so much, Harvey. Good night." Donna said as she heard the phone click on the other end.


	11. Chapter 11 - Thanksgiving

Chapter 11

Thanksgiving Day dawned as many a November day does in the East. The sky was mostly overcast, but a wan sun hid itself in the corner making the day rather miserable for being such a great holiday. The day matched Harvey's mood as he also awoke unusually with the sunlight. After hanging up with his wife the previous night, he lay staring at the ceiling. His mind kept repeating the conversation with Sergei and Sergei's evasiveness in answering Harvey's questions. His mind's eye kept seeing Sergei's number in Donna's phone and written address book. Not to mention the pass Sergei took at Rachel's shower. After the last event one would think the Donna would never want to see that womanizer again. He was having a hard time thinking that his wife would betray him with a man not even worth his weight. Before he was married, Harvey had been a womanizer but he did have the rule that he would not sleep with a married woman let alone one with children. It had hit too close to home for Harvey ever to do that.

The odd thought was that Harvey was actually looking forward to a full Specter family Thanksgiving including his mother given at his own home. Including his mother in the celebration was an idea that at one time Harvey would have abhorred. He had sworn so many times in his life that that woman would never have access to him, or he and his brother would never accept any type of help from her. As Harvey showered and changed into a suit for the formal dinner at home, he remembered a recent conversation he had had with his mother regarding the reasons behind her deceit and eventual desertion of her family.

"Mom, can you tell me why? Why would you abandon us? I know you cheated on dad for years and I kept the secret until I was so disgusted I couldn't anymore. I have trust issues that still have not abated although I have made some exceptions in the past few years. However, I am quick to judge someone and if I think someone has been disloyal to me I am the one to abandon them without giving them a chance to explain. These people are the people I love and care for. So I just want to know why?"

Lillian looked at her son with tears in her large brown eyes. She really never thought that her sins would have had any impact on her sons. Trust issues?

"Harvey it does seem that you haven't entirely alienated those who love you. You have a beautiful wife, two adorable children that I am looking forward to meeting soon and other people who really know the real you and care about you including that young associate I met last week. Mike?"

"Ross. Mike Ross. Yes he was my first experiment you might say. Anyway, why?" Harvey said taking his mother's hand in his and looking at her kindly but seriously.

"I was unhappy and I had been for a very long time. Your father's potential to go onto fame and fortune was immense. Instead he decided he was sick of the road and loved being a studio musician. Well, I was in it because I wanted to be associated if not married to a famous musician and be there from day one. However, my intentions wore out my actual desire. I loved your father's music which was what drew me to him in the first place. Then after our whirlwind romance, we actually had settled into a day-to-day routine; and it wasn't long that I grew tired and wanted the excitement again. I cheated and found excitement from not following the rules. I finally left because I felt that you would be better without me since I couldn't give 100% of myself to the situation. I simply thought I couldn't be a good mother if I had not been happy with myself."

"You know I have dad's solo tapes. Mike won them on Ebay and gave them to me as a peace offering when we were on opposite sides of a takeover."

"He reminds me of you, but a softer you. You were always good to me until you discovered I had been cheating on your dad then you turned as cold as ice on me. So I guess when I came back into your life I should have expected your aloofness and coldness."

"Mom," Harvey had said coming closer to his mom and squeezing her hand. "My wife and my boss have always been able to give me tough love when you couldn't. This situation between you and me has been no different. You know Donna was my secretary before I actually married her. Jessica paid my way through law school. They had both always been my friends. Donna told me that what you did was not to me, but to my father. But you did do it to me and to dad and to Marcus, however, I want to openly show my forgiveness and make sure that you will be at Thanksgiving. Marcus and his family are coming in from Boston and staying with us over the weekend."

The tears that had welled in Lillian's eyes had finally fallen to which Harvey handed his mother his handkerchief and held onto her.

Now Harvey wondered as he walked to his car with only a slight feeling that Donna might be cheating on him, how he should never had let anyone in. He always got hurt in the end. It was bad enough when his mother had abandoned him, but his wife? What did Donna see in this overbearing but charismatic showman? Donna had not been inexperienced with men and many a time she had lamented at how lame most of these men were. Harvey was sure that Sergei was no exception to that rule. Harvey just did not know. Maybe Harvey thought that Donna was not Scottie and would never cheat on him and hurt him. Scottie had cheated on her financée with Harvey which nagged Harvey in ever being able to trust her. When he and Scottie had tried a few years ago, at Donna's insistence, the constant bickering of keeping Mike's secret and Scottie's ambition had collapsed the relationship. Maybe Harvey should just confront Donna and find out what the truth really was?

Harvey started the car and pulled away from his condo building. He drove the few miles outside the city to pick up his mother from the hospice and then proceed home to where his _faithful_ wife and little children waited for his return.

Harvey's wife on the other hand had spent a good night especially after the telephone conversation with Harvey. She had known earlier in the day that he had something on his mind and he had been shutting her out of it. However when he had called and apologized, Donna thought all was well. As a bonus, Gordon had finally slept through the night. It was about time he was four months old at the beginning of November. Amanda had slept through the night when they finally brought her home after being a preemie and remaining in the hospital for about a month to have her lungs mature and her weight bulk up. Gordon who had been a good size at birth had grown even bigger so he was quite a handful. However he had the cutest chubby cheeks and big brown eyes, so anyone who came in contact with him could do nothing but spoil him. Donna imagined that Harvey may have been like that as a baby. She had seen his baby pictures when they visited Marcus' house. Marcus was very sentimental whereas his brother was less so. Perhaps, it was not the lack of sentimentality that was wont in Harvey it was just bad memories and the cutoff of childhood innocence.

Donna rose and took a shower. She then checked on Gordon and found him awake but not crying. He actually turned his head to look at his mom when he heard Donna's voice from the door. She picked him up and kissed him. She loved being a mother. She had acted the mother so many times to people that it just came naturally.

"Mommy!"

"Yes, Mandy, come in your brother's room. I have to get him ready for a bath before your grandmom and daddy come home.

Donna could hear Mandy's little footfalls on the thick carpet as she made her way to her brother's room. Dressed in her little princess' nightgown with her red mane all tangled in a bird's nest she looked fresh and clean from her night's slumber.

"See mommy. No pee. Potty," Amanda told her mother and pulled out her pull-up for her mother to feel.

With one hand on Gordon, Donna bent down and felt the dryness of the training pants that Amanda had been wearing.

"Wow. What a good girl! I bet if we tell daddy when he comes home he will get you a special treat!"

"Daddy pancakes!"

"Well, maybe tomorrow for those. Do you want to help me give Gordy a bath?"

Mandy nodded her head.

So with that Donna took a naked Gordon and a half naked Mandy to the spacious bathroom to get them ready for their Thanksgiving Day.

At nine a.m. on the button, Donna heard Harvey's Audi pull up in the driveway. She smoothed down her dress and checked the turkey in the oven. Donna was on her way to the door with Mandy when she heard Gordon wake up for his feeding. So Donna pushed Amanda to the front door and compelled her to wait for Harvey which was not hard since Amanda had been jumping up and down waiting for her daddy to come home. Donna went up to the nursery to attend to the baby.

Donna had told everyone that dinner would be about three p.m. She was hoping Harvey would help her a little when he got home, so she could focus on the dinner. So far she had been able to prepare the turkey with the stuffing inside and the green bean casserole. Hopefully Harvey had made a trip to the liquor store to replenish their cabinet as the only thing inside it was Harvey's favorite scotch. Donna had the dinner wine chilling in the refrigerator along with water, soda, and juice for the children.

"Daddy!" Amanda screamed as she slammed herself into Harvey's waiting arms. He had waved to her from outside so she knew he was coming in. As he picked his daughter up, he spotted Gordon's empty baby seat.

"Where's mommy?"

"Kitt chun," Mandy said and pointed. She became suddenly shy when the Lillian started to stare at her.

Harvey walked with Mandy in his arms after maneuvering to remove his mother's coat and hang it up in the coat closet in the foyer. Mandy hid her face in her father's shoulder and only sneaked a peek at the woman standing beside Harvey.

"Mandy? This is your Grandmom Lillian," Harvey said to his daughter encouraging her to look at Lillian. This is daddy's mom."

"Gandmom Lilyun," Mandy managed to say clear as a bell to which Lillian smiled silently and could not believe how she resembled both her parents.

"Mandy," Harvey said putting down his daughter. "You take Grandmom's hand and show her where to sit. You think you can do that?"

Mandy nodded and took Lillian's hand.

"Mom, I'm going to find the rest of the family."

Lillian said, "No hurry. I have more than enough company with this little one."

After watching Mandy walk with his mother into the living room near where her toys were kept, Harvey walked around the wall to the kitchen where he saw the turkey cooking in the oven and a couple of pots set out for additional preparation. He left the kitchen in search of his wife and son and finally spotted them in the nursery where Donna had just finished feeding Gordon. The baby lay asleep with one hand on Donna's bared breast and his little mouth slightly open. The dim light from the blinds in the nursery placed golden highlights on Donna's coiffed red hair, still face as she gazed on the wonderment she held in her arms. Harvey was caught dead in his tracks. Donna looked positively angelic. How could he think she would cheat on him? She loved him and always had so she claimed. She loved their children and was always positive that since he had grown up he would be a wonderful father. She had wanted to have his babies, so she had confided to him plenty of times since they had married. It was a blessing that it had happened so quickly.

Looking down in shame from what his thoughts had been earlier, Harvey quietly approached his wife who looked up and smiled at him as he came nearer.

Harvey kissed her.

"When I fall asleep, there's no place better than there," Harvey said softly with a smile.

"Well, you might have gotten to sleep there if you had been home last night, husband. Glad you're home," Donna said reaching up to Harvey for another kiss.

"Do you think we would disturb him if I carried him out to show mom?" Harvey asked.

"No, he's good for another two hours. Here," Donna said handing the baby to Harvey and then she hooked her nursing bra and finished replacing her dress. "I need to wipe down a couple of things. Go ahead and show her Gordon." Donna smiled as she watched Harvey walk out of the nursery carrying their son. Harvey's proud gaze on is son was evident. Harvey was oblivious to Donna's gaze on him as she watched Harvey carry their son into the living room. She momentarily remembered how different a man he was now from the one she had come to work for almost twelve years ago. He essentially deep inside was the same, but the overall change was phenomenal. Once, having children of his own let alone be a husband to one woman would have never been entertained by Harvey Specter. However, Donna knew that ever since he had held his first child in his arms, Harvey had fallen deeply in love with fatherhood.

By the time Harvey had carried baby Gordon to show Lillian, Marcus, Kate and their brood had arrived. All three of Marcus' ran to their grandmother whom they had not seen for some time. Little Amanda felt overwhelmed at the boisterous hello her cousins gave their grandmother. To Mandy, Grandma Lillian was still a stranger but apparently to her older cousins she was a welcome sight. Finally it was Marcus, Jr.,age 5, who took the reins and pulled his cousin back to their grandmother.

"Come on, Mandy, she's your grandmom, too," said Marcus Anthony Specter, Jr., the spitting image of his dad and just as kind.

Amanda Elizabeth Specter, with big brown eyes like her father's looked up at her taller cousin and let herself be pulled back to the pile of children and the matriarch sitting in the middle while holding her youngest of all five grandchildren in her arms.

Harvey and Marcus looked at one another and just smiled.

Donna came out of the nursery just as Kate Specter walked back into the house carrying a tote bag full of fresh food to be prepared on the spot.

Kate, a smaller woman in stature than Donna, a brunette, with a sweet round face sometimes felt inferior to Harvey and his statuesque flame-haired bride; however, she greeted Donna with a kiss and hug. To tell the truth Kate loved Donna and Donna loved Kate. They may have looked very different but in each heart their husbands and children came first. Kate was also a woman with a great sense of humor which Donna was glad when they were allowed out without the children or their husbands. They were not above getting in trouble.

"Hey Donna you look fantastic!" Kate exclaimed handing the bag to Donna who looked inside.

"Of course, I do, I'm Donna," Donna said laughing at herself and giving Kate a big hug. "What's in here? It weighs a ton!"

"There are yams, white potatoes, and fresh carrots. The potatoes and the carrots are for today, but the yams which I know Harvey likes as well as Marcus I thought would do for tomorrow night."

"Why, my mom and sister are coming tomorrow night to sit so we could all go out on the town," Donna said carrying the heavy bag to the kitchen and dumping its contents on the messy counter. It was strewn with both dirty and clean dishes to which Donna started putting them back in their spots.

"I haven't had a minute to tidy up before you guys got here. Harvey spent the night in town so he could pick up Lillian at the hospice and Gordon was so fussy this morning I only had time to place the turkey in the oven."

"Don't apologize to me. I know how it is..."

So Donna and Kate spoke about homey things and their respective husbands then the latter's husband said, "Kate, honey, bring Donna over here. I don't think she ever met mom properly."

Donna came over and Harvey briefly squeezed her hand and gave her a wink.

"We did meet briefly at the ground floor of the firm's building. Lillian," Donna said going forward to give her mother-in-law a squeeze and kiss on the cheek.

"Lillian? I hoped you would call me "Mom" by now," Lillian said as she looked at Harvey for permission.

"It's not up to me, Donna. You can do whatever is comfortable for the two of you." Harvey said going to the bar for a drink.

They passed the holiday hours in companionable and familial conversation. They each took turns playing with the children and Lillian was able to feed Gordon from a bottle of formula that Donna had specifically made up knowing she would not have the time to nurse him.

Regina, aged 10 and Fiona, age 8 actually played happily with little Amanda and Marcus their little brother whom normally they eschewed like the plague.

Dinner went off without a hitch and all children were fed and in bed early. Lillian had to be back at the hospice for her nightly medication by 7:30 pm, so Marcus and Harvey decided to drive her back together which gave Donna and her sister-in-law time to talk.

About 8:00 pm when the children had actually fallen asleep in their beds, little Gordon had his last feeding until about three a.m. and Marcus and Harvey were still out, Kate broached the subject of Lillian's relationship with Harvey now that he had taken care of her needs in these the last few weeks before she faced a certain death.

Donna had changed into her lounging pajamas as Kate had done the same. Donna and Kate sat on the couch closest to the bedrooms and the baby monitor sat on an end table next to Donna in the event that the baby needed anything. Kate and Donna shared a special bottle of wine that Donna knew would not ignite Kate's allergy to wine. Kate broke out into horrible hives if she drank dark red wine. However, Donna had found a very expensive brand that she knew Kate could tolerate. Donna was slowly weaning Gordon like she said previously many times so she was not above tippling herself now and then when the occasion called for it.

"So Harvey seems to be taking his mother in stride now that she's back in his life," Kate said running a finger around the rim of her wineglass.

"Well, you know, it's Harvey. He never says too much about it. Not even to me. He seems to be ok with the situation."

"He doesn't talk about it even to you? I thought he always confided everything to you."

"He does normally but he has just decided to man up and do what has to be done. That is usually how he does things and sometimes that speaks volumes of his feelings. I know, though, for him to say the words once in a while would be nice."

"I'll say one thing for him. When I married Marcus and Harvey was his best man, I thought Harvey very cold and not caring for anyone but himself. However, even in those days, if your name was mentioned in a conversation Harvey would become this different person. He would open up and talk about what you and he had accomplished. Never anything too personal because I think he still had half a foot in Scottie, if you know what I mean. Then big Gordon would push Harvey and push Harvey and keep telling him "you'd better marry Donna before someone else does." Did you know that?"

"Yes, Gordon would hint at those things when he called the office to talk to Harvey. I met Gordon Specter at a function in Boston where Harvey and I had gone for a business trip. Harvey had had no idea until Marcus told him that he was playing in a club up there. So we went and then I stayed at the house for the next two days. Harvey and I never slept together or anything but Gordon was always trying to push us together in that way. Harvey was not ready in those days, and I had had rule that I did not sleep with men that I worked with."

"What changed?"

"We got tired of being with other people and finally realized that the only person right for us was each other. It took ten years but he finally let his feelings for me show and I was too tired to hesitate for any reason. Besides I really wanted to become a mom and there was no other man's baby I wanted to have but his."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. Now about Lillian she was not all what I expected. She really did all that stuff she said she did back when she was young and a jazz groupie?"

"She has pictures buried somewhere. Marcus showed me," Kate said giggling as she became more inebriated.

"Listen, Kate, I have to go somewhere in the morning. Harvey knows but I just wanted to tell you in case he forgets. I have to leave about 8:30 and drive into the city for my appointment," Donna said confiding her dilemma to Kate.

Kate looked at Donna and said, "What's the appointment for? Got another guy? Ha, Ha..." .

"Of course not. I have to go into town for another fitting of my gown for the wedding and I have to go by Rachel's parents' house which is where it is before I go to the seamstress. Besides I won't be long. I'll be back before noon," Donna said finishing up her wine.

They then turned the TV on to some touchy, feely movie where at the end both women were in tears to the curiosity of their husbands who had just walked into the door.

Later that night Donna and Harvey lie in bed in each other's arms. Donna had been exhausted and too tired to do much more than cuddle, so Harvey lay restless with her in his arms. He kissed the top of her head and play with a lock of her beautiful hair. Despite what Donna had thought he had remembered that she would be off early to an appointment. She told him something to do with Rachel's wedding but a constant gnawing at the back of Harvey's brain kept telling him that Donna was lying to him. He was a lawyer after all. He could tell when people lied to him.

When he saw her earlier in the throes of nursing their son, his anger at her supposed deception evaporated. He could never stay mad at her long. Letting her beauty and the specialness of the moment take his anger away, it now returned with an almost fierceness that Harvey thought must remain speechless giving his wife the benefit of the doubt.

All in all, it was a wonderful day in the Specter family history. His brother and his wife lay in the guest bedroom and their three children shared Amanda's spacious bedroom in sleeping bags and cushiony pillows that they brought just for the occasion. Her cousins had given Amanda her own big Dora the Explorer pillow which almost smothered the little girl in her little bed. Harvey smiled as he shut out the light noting how adorable all the children looked and how happy he was inside. Nothing was going to take this feeling away from Harvey. He had never been happy from domesticity but now it was all that brought him peace after dealing with corporate tycoons and their million dollar companies. Harvey had come to realize that even with all their wealth the only people that mattered in the world to him was the woman lying in his arms, their children healthy and lying in their beds and his little brother happy with his own family. Perhaps now he could also include in that circle his mother with whom none of this probably would ever have been possible.


	12. Chapter 12 - Black Friday

Chapter 12

Donna rode to her appointment with Sergei with a horrible feeling that she was betraying her husband. It was for his benefit that she was going so she hoped in the end Harvey would not be too mad at her. It was now 9:00 am and as she hit the streets of Manhattan, the Black Friday crowds were everywhere. Donna knew she should not be meeting Sergei secretively; and not only did she loathe driving in heavy traffic she left her husband in charge of the kids and her sister-in-law a potential ally in a lie. To make her deception plausible, though, she brought her maid of honor shoes that matched her teal gown with her just in case anyone asked questions.

Luckily Donna found a parking place in front of the store. She got out of the car and seeing her breath in the cold November air as she exhaled with a sigh put a coin in the parking meter and ventured into the "Room for A Venue" store. She opened the door to which the bell jingled announcing her arrival. The place was dark and eerie as if she came on the wrong day.

"Sergei?" Donna called.

He breezed in from some other room. He was dressed very casually in a button down long sleeve shirt with a pair of plain black trousers. His shirt was open at the throat revealing a smattering of dark chest hair.

"Donna! I am so glad you were able to come. I won't keep you too long from your family, I promise."

Donna felt a little self-conscious. She had dressed carefully because this was a business meeting but at the same time she did not want to look too dressed up in the event that she had awakened anyone in the house before leaving. She wore one of the oft-worn pantsuits she reserved for the office when Manhattan became extremely too cold to wear a short skirt and high heels with or without stockings. It was dark blue and fit her figure tight including the burgundy button down shirt she wore underneath the blazer. She was aware that her breasts were still oversized. Her blouse barely buttoned which seemed to please her meeting associate as his eyes were drawn to her bust line.

"Sergei, my eyes are up here," Donna said pointing to her face. She needed to put him in his place because suddenly she felt that he had brought her here for nefarious reasons. He was attractive but Donna would never be drawn to someone like him. She could read people and she could tell that Sergei liked himself too much and used women for that purpose. Unlike Harvey, Sergei did not really have a heart lurking underneath that handsome womanizing facade. Harvey was a complex man and used his bravado to hide from being hurt. Sergei was just one of those nasty types who felt privileged and felt the rules of human decency did not apply to him.

"Yes, of course, I'm so sorry. You're just so breathtaking. I am so grateful that you are here. Come sit here and the Chef will bring out his samples for you."

Sergei led her over to a chair at a table which was set way too formally for just a sample tasting. She didn't remember going through all this for Rachel's shower and that seemed a little more pompous affair than just a birthday party for her husband. She sat down and was self-conscious of her breasts popping out of her tightly buttoned shirt. It was funny for Donna to be uncomfortable with any male. She had realized a long time ago that she could outsmart any man because first she caught them with her beauty and then she flirted with them with her wit and brains.

Sergei put his hands on her shoulders and squeezed. He also caught a glimpse of Donna's endowments as he did so. His hand stretched its way down to the top of her breast. Donna pulled her own chair in that moment breaking the contact between them. She gulped a little and thought: _What was I thinking when I wanted him to cater Harvey's birthday party?_

"Listen, Sergei, I'm sure whatever you pick is fine. Harvey and our guests will eat just about anything," Donna reacted to Sergei as she rose from the chair.

"No, you really must sample these dishes for yourself. So sit back down and they will be here momentarily," Sergei insisted.

Against her better judgment, Donna sat back down and pulled in her own chair before Sergei could get a hand on it.

Sergei then got up and poured chilled wine into the goblet sitting on the table. Donna looked at her watch it was just 9:35 am now. _Drinking chilled wine before noon? What was this a business appointment or a seduction?_

"Wine? You do realize it is very early in the morning for that? None for me, though, I'm still nursing," Donna gave the excuse and pushed the full goblet aside. " I will just have water. I brought a bottle with me. It's a rather long trip," Donna said. There was no way in hell she was drinking or eating anything this pervert had to offer.

"Please, Donna. I promise you it's a light fare. You sniff if you wish..."

"No, just give me the samples and I'll try them. I have to get back very soon..."Donna said as she pulled a little bit away from the table in the event she had to make a quick getaway.

"Ok. No problem. I'll be right back with the samples," Sergei said as he quickly rose and hurriedly walked to the kitchen.

Donna decided she was leaving. She realized now what a creep he actually was. She had not wanted to recognize it at Rachel's shower, but then she did not want to make a production number out of it because Harvey had been pissed, Mike had been drunk, and Rachel was so happy she was glowing more than fireworks on the Fourth of July.

Unfortunately, Donna could not make a clean getaway because as soon as she opened the door the bell jingled and a man's hand stood over Donna closing the door for her before she was on the other side.

"Donna? Where are you going? I thought you wished to try the samples I have prepared," Sergei asked standing over Donna. He dipped his head near her shoulder taking in her scent and trying to nuzzle near her neck and shoulder. He could not help but look at her large breasts and wanted to touch them. He tried again to reach for one until Donna stood tall.

"Look, I really have an emergency. One of my children is very sick all of a sudden and I have to get home. You know how it is...well, maybe you don't," Donna said panicking because she could smell his cologne and the look in his eyes became very dominating and smoldering. Maybe other women fell for this ruse, but Donna Paulsen Specter was not one of them. The only one that ever affected her that way was the man who was now at home taking care of their children.

"Please, Donna, I have planned everything. I am sure you will like it," Sergei said reaching for one of her breasts which seemingly popped out of her blouse. Donna reacted by slapping his hand away and then punching him in the face.

As he lay on the floor holding his bloody nose, Donna said, "It strikes me that you are no longer talking about food, Sergei, because your eyes haven't lifted from my boobs since I arrived. You know what? I don't know why I called you in the first place. You are a pig. You know what else? You can keep the deposit I gave you. I don't want you anywhere around me or my family!"

Donna pulled open the door and stomped her way to her car and drove off back to her family and the rest of the holiday weekend.

Harvey woke up to find his 18 month old daughter, red hair all in tangles with her Dora pillow clutched in her little hands, sitting on his chest.

"Daddy, get up!" Amanda commanded.

"Daddy's sleepy...Mandy, come in here with Daddy," Harvey said sleepily eyeing her with one eye. He lifted her off his chest and tucked her and Dora next to him. He then turned to see the clock on the bedside table. It read 9:00 am in big red numbers.

"Shh...we have to be quiet or we will wake everybody up," Harvey said tucking Mandy under his arm.

"Too late, big brother, Donna's gone and I made the Specter waffles!" Marcus came into the spacious room and eyed his brother.

"Yay..waffles!" Mandy said leaving Harvey in a dead run for the kitchen.

Before venturing into the bathroom to brush his teeth, Harvey brushed his hand on Donna's side of the bed. He clutched her pillow and brought it to his nose where he could sniff her special scent. He missed her when she was gone. He didn't awaken to her knowledge but he was well aware that she had left very early for her "appointment" with the seamstress.

Harvey rose out of bed then and plodded his way tiredly to the bathroom. He brushed his teeth and ran a hand through his unruly "do" and began to shave.

As he stood at the mirror, he heard Gordon crying.

"Kate," Harvey called for his sister-in-law.

"Already got him, don't worry," Kate called back.

After Harvey was finished shaving and with a still pajama clad Mandy (she had returned to Harvey when she was intimidated by her loud older cousins) clinging to his leg walked his way into the kitchen where chaos was in full force. Gordon was crying up a storm; his brother's kids were fighting back and forth; Marcus was reading the paper-Harvey's paper; and Kate was trying to placate all around. The only thing missing was Harvey's wife. Did Donna really have an appointment that early with the seamstress? Still harboring suspicions, Harvey picked up Mandy from his leg and placed her in her booster seat at the table. He picked up Gordon who seeing his daddy stopped crying.

"I'm just waiting for his bottle to heat that Donna left for him. Do you want to feed him or do you want me to do it?"

"No I'll do it," Harvey volunteered gladly. "Just feed Mandy some waffles before she bursts into tears, ok?"

Kate patted Harvey on the shoulder and said, "No problem. I'm used to chaos in the morning."

Harvey took Gordon's bottle out of the pot boiling on the stove and strolled to the rocking recliner in the living room where it was quiet and he could hear himself think.

While watching Gordon slurp his bottle, Harvey confided his fears quietly to him.

Donna was so shaken by her appointment with Sergei that she knew she would have to take a breather before she drove all the way back home. Once home, Harvey may or may not know (it was hard to tell anymore) that she was hiding something. If he really thought about it, he would pressure her until she broke. So Donna decided to pull herself together by visiting her mother-in-law in the hospice to see how she was faring and to see how she enjoyed herself yesterday. Donna, Kate, and Lillian had had a little time to speak with one another during the day yesterday and Lillian actually thanked Donna for taking care of her son and making him who he was.

"Well, I'm not sure I can take all the credit, Lillian. Harvey was always ambitious and knew exactly what he wanted. However, I can remember once or twice when I kept him from jumping in the deep end without his swimmies," Donna had joked.

They all laughed at the image of Harvey Specter in swimming trunks and an inflated floatie around each upper arm.

Starting the car and finally driving home, she texted Harvey to say she was stopping by the hospice to see his mom on the way back home. He said everything was good and to tell her he was glad she had been able to come yesterday. _Far be it from Harvey to actually confessing loving his mother,_ Donna thought. She signed off with an "I love you" and Harvey returned it.

Bolstered by Harvey's love for her stated so succinctly in the text message, Donna drove away from Sergei and the nightmare situation she had unknowingly embroiled herself. Donna hoped and prayed that that was the last she would ever see of Sergei, but she thought probably not.

"Donna! How nice to see you!"

"Hi Lillian. I'm glad to see you recovered from yesterday," Donna said as she came over to the older woman's bed and gave her a hug.

Taking Donna's hands in hers, Lillian rolled her eyes and said, "Recover! I was just getting started when it was time to take me home. I enjoyed yesterday so much. I had forgotten what family felt like."

"Well we were certainly glad that you were there. Harvey was too. Believe it or not."

"I do believe it. You have made him very happy. He loves being a daddy, too, doesn't he?"

"Yes. He does. I knew he would be a good father. He loved Gordon very much."

"I know. He always held his dad up as a supreme being. Me...not so much. I can't say as I blame him. Did he explain everything to you about me?"

"Not in so many words. It doesn't matter, though. You are here and in the family circle, so you don't have to be alone again."

"Thank you, Donna. That means so much to me."

Releasing Donna's hand, Lillian sat back and said, "Now tell me the real reason you're here."

After Harvey had fed baby Gordon and played with him a bit, he put him down and said he had to go into the office for a couple of appointments he almost forgot he had made. Donna had texted him to remind him that he had specifically wanted to work on Black Friday. He wondered how long Donna was going to be with his mother and he okayed with Kate about leaving her and Marcus in charge of their two as well as their own brood.

"No worries, Harvey," Kate said. "I'm sure Donna will be back soon."

"That reminds me. Did Donna tell you that her sister, Julia, and her mother are coming over to sit, so we can all go out tonight?"

"Yes, she did mention it last night. Now, go on, Harvey, get to the office so you can get home," Kate said patting him on the shoulder. "I don't mind the baby. It's been a few years, so I've missed holding a little one."

"Is that a hint you want to pass onto my brother?" Harvey said out of his mouth so Marcus who was in close proximity might hear them.

"Oh my word, no, not right now. We just got rid of all the baby stuff to you guys, remember?"

Harvey just smiled and hugged his sister-in-law.

"Catch you guys later."

So Harvey walked out the door and drove into Manhattan to the offices of Pearson Specter Litt.

Once there, he rode up to the 50th floor and when the elevator doors burst open he was surprised by Jessica just getting into the elevator.

"Where are you going?" Harvey asked.

"I've got a Black Friday date. It's nice to see you decided to work. It's only 11:00 am," Jessica punted back.

"I forgot Donna made two appointments with two clients who didn't mind working on Black Friday either. I almost forgot."

"Thank God for Donna." Jessica said smiling sarcastically.

"Yes. Did you have a nice Thanksgiving dinner with your family?," Harvey asked.

"Well, you know, I actually managed not to fight with my father over the football games. We came out even on our betting. What about you? How'd it work out with your mother there?" Jessica was really wondering about that because ever since she had known Harvey he never talked about or considered his mother.

"It worked out well. We really had a nice day yesterday. Well I gotta run. See you on Monday," Harvey said finally allowing Jessica to get on the elevator.

He strode to his office and looked fondly at Donna's cubicle. She had accidentally left her computer on Wednesday and the slide show screen saver of family snapshots continued to rotate. He decided that enough electricity had been burning, so he went over to turn her hard drive off when Sergei's phone number and address had popped onto the screen. The suspicions that had been starting to dampen sparked again. This time Harvey was going to do some investigation into this Sergei Patranov.

"So you go home and tell Harvey the truth about where you were today. He'll understand," Lillian said as she listened to Donna's story.

"You don't understand. He's already erected a barrier between us because I engaged Sergei for Rachel's shower and then while we there Sergei wound up with his face in my cleavage. He's going to think I betrayed him and his little barrier will become a wall. He's done it before. He's still that scared little boy inside that whoever does anything behind his back has betrayed him. No matter whether it is for his benefit or not."

Lillian put her hand to her chin and looked away for a minute. She then said, "If you tell him and he does this, you send him here to talk with me. I will set him straight. After all I am his mother and deep down I know he still loves me."

"Of course, he does. That's why when he realized what you were doing and left it scarred him so badly. He is still so afraid to love. He loves me and the children, but many times I still feel I have to walk on eggshells around him. He has come a long way it is just those last few insecurities that keep him from really knowing that I would never cheat on him nor endanger him in anyway. I gave up any other opportunities I had for a family life because my focus was always on him," Donna said tearing up. Her confession to her mother-in-law became in earnest at how much she loved Harvey but how much he still needed to learn about commitment and being in a loving relationship.

"Ten years I waited for him to tell me that it was me he wanted. I watched him tear through women and the few that I contrived to be happy about he screwed it up somehow. I had a couple of chances with other men, but Harvey was always my blind spot. I could never say "no" to him. I still can't," Donna cried taking a tissue and blowing her nose.

Lillian rose and took her daughter-in-law in her arms.

"Sometimes one can't help or protect those we love no matter how much we try. That's all we can do is try."

Lillian released Donna from her embrace and said, "You go home and tell Harvey exactly what happened. He has to realize that it was no picnic for you and that you escaped with no bodily harm has to bring it home to him. That you were in more danger from the meeting with Sergei than was your relationship with your husband. You said he was getting better. He may surprise you."

Donna looked at her watch and said, "Oh my gosh, my mother and sister are coming to babysit so Harvey, Marcus, Kate, and I can paint the town red. That is if my husband decided to stop working."

"Thanks for stopping by, dear. Remember," Lillian said as she rose to accompany Donna out the door. "You send that son to me if he even shows something other than understanding."

"Thank you," Donna said and kissed Lillian on her cheek and then she left feeling better than when she had ventured in.

Harvey was in the middle of his internet investigation of Sergei Patronov when his first appointment walked in.

"Hello, Conklin, how's the new baby?" Harvey said rising to shake his client's hand. Justin Conklin was the CEO of a large multi located engineering firm. Harvey had been the corporation's lawyer for more than five years. In that time Harvey had guided the company from a small influential company with construction and industrial interests to a multi billion dollar conglomerate. Today there discussion was going to center around a new merger with a smaller but competitive engineering firm which lately seemed to be outbidding them for work in the New York area.

"Oh, he is just fine. How's your family?" Justin asked as he took a seat. Justin, a man around Harvey's age, had married a woman much younger than he and they had just had their first child. Justin had been Harvey's client for upwards of five years. When Justin walked in five years ago, Harvey would always shake his hand and want to plunge in right away. However, since Harvey had married his secretary and become a father, he always started out with a handshake and asked about Justin's immediate family or in this case the new baby. Justin found Harvey sharp a lawyer as always but the experience was now a much more pleasant one. Harvey was a warmer man and although Justin Conklin was a cutthroat corporate businessman he enjoyed a little small talk now and then.

"Thriving. Thank you for coming in on Black Friday..." Harvey and Justin continued to speak and work out the particulars of the proposed merger.

When Justin left, it was 1:30 pm. He had been left a voicemail message by his second client that the meeting would have to be postponed and that he would appreciate a call when his secretary had set up the new meeting time. Harvey sent an email to Donna for her to take care of that on Monday when they were both due back in the office.

In the meantime, Harvey returned to his investigation into Sergei Patronov and was not pleased to find this guy was a huge fraud when it came to who he really was and what he actually did for a living. Harvey printed out the information to be used at a later time and to tell Donna she had better steer clear of this guy. His suspicions about her returned, however, he contrived to give his wife the benefit of the doubt. Something that the old Harvey would never have done.


	13. Chapter 13 - Hidden Identity

**Author's Note: I wrote most of this before they episodes showing Harvey's childhood troubles. Lillian's looks come from my own imagination before seeing the actress they had play Lillian. Again, I don't own any of these characters except the ones I made up on my own. Please R & R I am always encouraged by those who do. Thank you. Will finish this one on a good note, I promise! - CC**

Chapter 13

Harvey won the contest of which spouse would come home first. Harvey thought Donna would have been home before him home since she had called to tell him when he got to the office that she was leaving the hospice. He tried her cell but it went right to voicemail. Harvey thought that odd since there was a phone charger in the minivan. Harvey became worried because it was now 4:00 pm and Donna's mom and sister were going to be here any minute. They had reservations for 6:00 at one of the local upscale restaurants and it always took the women at least an hour to get ready for a night out.

Another twenty minutes went by and he decided to call Rachel to see if she had seen his wife since her absence was due to Donna's dress for her wedding.

"No, Harvey, I haven't seen Donna all day. I was at my mother's but that wasn't until around 11:00 this morning. I didn't think any more alterations had to be made for her dress. Besides her dress is still hanging in my mother's bedroom closet waiting for the big day. Why? Is something wrong?" Rachel asked concerned.

Harvey did not let on that he was now fuming. "No, I guess, she must have not needed it for some strange reason. Thanks, Rachel. I'll let you know if anything is wrong."

Harvey hung up. He did not know what to think. He did not want to think the worst of her, but lately she had been cagey about questions regarding that oversexed caterer coupled with the fact that she had to attend these odd meetings. Besides every time Harvey had accidentally looked into Donna's address book, phone, or computer Patronov's name and private phone number just seemed to appear.

Harvey knew Donna was not stupid or desperate but he just could not help feelings of jealousy infiltrate his mind. Just when his more concerned side overcame his feelings of jealousy, Harvey heard her come through the den door from the direction of the garage.

"Harvey!" Donna called. "Come help me! By the way, don't bring the children with you!"

The feeling of relief that his wife was safely home did little to quell his annoyance at what she was going to tell him. She knew she had lied to him about the dress alterations, and he hoped she had not been lying about seeing his mother. That was easy enough to prove. She would have had to sign the visitor's log.

Harvey walked toward where Donna had been calling him. Despite what she said about not bringing the children with him, he held Gordon to his shoulder. Harvey was dressed and ready to go on their foursome date, however, he had a cloth diaper slung over his one suited shoulder so Gordon, the King of Spitters, could not spit and coerce Harvey into changing again. Harvey was not so sure how many suits he had left in his closet since the baby seemed to spit all over him when Harvey was formally dressed every time Harvey picked up Gordon.

"Donna! Where have you been? You'd better hurry up and get dressed. Marcus, Kate, and the kids will be back in a few minutes. Your mom and sister will be here, too, soon! What the hell is this?" Harvey asked angrily as he spotted huge amounts of toys sitting in the den in front of the door connecting it to the garage. Donna was still carrying boxes, wrapping paper, and Christmas decorations as Harvey stared at the all the packages. The last thing he noticed she carried in were her shoes for Rachel's wedding. Seeing this brought Harvey's anger to the forefront knowing that she had deliberately lied to him. Something she had only done once or twice but never to the extent of this lie.

"This is the children's Christmas' presents and some additional decorations, among other things. Why the third degree? I got caught up in the Black Friday crowds and I got some real bargains. You'll be happy your credit card still has room on it for tonight." Donna said as she carried a large box containing a Barbie Townhouse which was obviously for Amanda.

"Where is Mandy?" Donna asked not seeing or hearing her daughter.

"She went with Marcus and Kate to get something at McDonald's before we go out," Harvey said quietly with an edge to his voice.

"What about my baby?" Donna said in a baby voice taking Gordon, the diaper, and the bottle from Harvey. "Please put the obvious toys someplace where Amanda can't get to them."

"Donna," Harvey was pissed. "We don't have time for this. Besides where were you?"

"I told you. I had to go to the seamstress' and then I went to see your mother and then I spotted a bargain at FAO Schwartz as I was driving so I had just had to stop. I guess I just was enjoying myself too much and forgot about the time."

"You never went to the seamstress' this morning because you never had an appointment there to begin with, did you? I told you I know when someone is lying to me and you did and I know you did. Did you really go see my mother or should I call them and have them check the visitor's log for your name, Donna Specter!"

"Harvey, stop! Not now. Let me get Gordon settled and then I will tell you everything." Donna knew she had been caught. Harvey could never tolerate lying, subterfuge, or dishonesty of any kind. Although as a lawyer he had done it a few times to get the settlement he wanted. However, dishonesty and lying were anathema to their own relationship. It was intolerable. Lying to him, no matter how little a fib, Harvey felt as a great betrayal. It was just a little of the emotional baggage that his mother had given him when she had finally left him, his brother and father.

Donna quickly rocked Gordon and he fell asleep. She kissed him on the forehead and laid him in the bassinet which she realized he would outgrow soon. She then went in search of Harvey. She had found Harvey had retreated to their bedroom accompanied by a large glass of Macallan 18. Donna noticed there was not one for her. Carrying over from the office ritual she and Harvey would sometimes have their scotch at home after a particularly rough day at the office and after they had gotten Amanda to sleep for the night.

"Harvey," Donna said quietly. Just before she was going to confront him about his outbursts and ask him about his accusations, Amanda came running in to see her mommy who had been gone all day.

"Mommy!" Amanda Specter exclaimed rushing into her mother nearly knocking Donna over.

"How's my big girl? Did you have French Fries?" Donna asked feigning wide eyed innocence and excitement.

"Yes! I played in the tubs," Amanda said excitedly. Then she ran to Harvey who picked her up and hugged her fiercely as if she were the only one in the world he could hold onto and would not hurt him.

"Tubes, right?" Harvey smiled. He loved his children so much. He would never do to them what his mother had done to him and his brother. He thought Donna understood. Could he have judged her so wrong after 14 years together, well, more or less together?"

Harvey continued to smile and talk with Amanda seemingly to ignore that Donna was in the room with them. Eventually Donna turned away and walked out of the bedroom arriving in the living room welcoming her just arrived mom and sister and reintroducing them to the other side of the family.

"Mom, can you look in on Gordon for a moment? I got home late from the city and I have to get dressed or we'll be late for our dinner reservations. He's in the den. I left the baby monitor in the nursery."

"Of course, dear," Roberta Paulsen stated. She noticed Donna's teary eyed look and thought how strange that was for her to see the tears in her daughter's eyes. Roberta knew something was not quite right between her daughter and her husband at the moment. However, no marriage was ever perfect even if the two knew each other the way Harvey and Donna knew one another. She was sure they would work it out. They had not loved one another for fourteen years for nothing.

When Donna had returned to their bedroom she had noticed that Harvey had not moved from the French doors that led to the outdoor balcony right outside their bedroom. He just stood there with the half empty glass in his hand.

"How many of those have you had, honey?" Donna asked calmly. She began to get out of her pantsuit. After removing her last article of clothing except her bra and panties, Donna padded quickly into the bathroom for a quick shower. She could be showered, dressed, and all made up in 15minutes. Tonight she would have to wear her red locks up because there was no time to play with them. Since having the baby not only was she continually leaking milk her hair had begun to lose the thickness and luster it had contained with the pregnancy hormones. "It's still beautiful" Harvey had said one night not long ago as they lay in bed and he played with a few strands that lay errantly on his pillow.

This was not going to be a fun night. Harvey had not answered her question just continued to play with the liquid trapped in the glass and glaring at her as if she had committed a horrible crime. If he would just let her explain, she would know that she had made a terrible error in judgment. She could not have known that he was thinking the worst of her right now. They would have to pretend to have a good time because it was way too late to cancel out with Marcus and Kate now.

Donna came out of the bathroom fifteen minutes later dressed and coiffed to the nines. At any other time Harvey would look at his wife and immediately want to rip her clothes off and take her to bed, however, he did acknowledge to himself that his wife was definitely a sexy, beautiful woman and apparently not the only man who thought so. Well, yes, he had always known that, but before he never thought his wife would actually respond to someone else; at least not while she was still married to him.

"Are you ready to go?" Harvey asked menacingly clutching the glass of scotch and gulping the remaining contents.

Donna, almost afraid at Harvey's behavior, stated succinctly, "Are you driving or did you call Ray?"

"You called Ray the other day, didn't you?" Harvey harshly asked stopping in his tracks directly in front of Donna. He was practically breathing fire at her.

"Harvey, before we say things to each other and in front of Marcus and Kate, let me explain about this morning," Donna said taking a seat on the bed. Harvey had turned to stand in front of her and continued to clench and unclench his jaw. He was terribly close to losing his temper.

"Har.."

Suddenly Marcus came in abruptly and said, 'Ray just pulled up guys. Are you ready?"

Donna rose as Harvey smiled and said to his brother, "Of course we are. Donna?" He followed her out of the bedroom. In her ear as he walked past, he said through clenched teeth, "This isn't over."

Donna stopped in her tracks momentarily. Standing there in her Manolos and her $900 gown, she had a hard time taking another step forward knowing that when she got home she may have lost her husband for good.

The upscale Italian restaurant that the four Specters patronized that Black Friday evening contained an ambiance and level of sophistication that one usually on encountered in downtown Manhattan. The place was all glass, candles, expensive wine and expensive food. Harvey had told his brother and Kate that the sky was the limit. His treat to which is brother said, "As usual." Then Kate took her husband's arm and gratefully thanked Harvey and Donna for their hospitality this weekend.

"Nonsense, we love having you here. We don't do this enough," Donna said and meant it leaning next to her sister-in-law giving her a side hug and squeeze. Donna had noticed the look in Kate's eyes as she and Harvey had exited from their bedroom. Donna knew that Kate suspected something was amiss between them. She said nothing as she always thought it only proper that was between husband and wife stayed between husband and wife. Donna was grateful for the distraction of this evening's dinner as she needed time to be sure of how she carefully told Harvey where she had been during the day.

While she had been visiting Harvey's mother and twice more during her shopping and driving exertion, Sergei tried to contact Donna. He sent her a text and called her twice. The text was apologetic in tone, but the subtext was that he would expose their little meetings to her husband and exaggerate the reasons for them. Upon receiving that text, Donna called Sergei back and threatened police action and threats of a lawsuit for attempted rape. Sergei's responded with laughter to these messages. He laughed nonchalantly in her ear her over the phone and threatened her to just try to prosecute him. Donna had been hoping to scare Sergei because he must have known that Harvey had been a very good Assistant District Attorney for a couple of years and had successfully put the criminal element behind bars.

Harvey had looked at his wife and tried to find that sparkle in her eyes when she knew she was being admired. He could not detect it tonight. Donna was off her game, and Harvey guessed her neglect of him and her children today may have been the cause. He knew she had been lying to him. He just could not figure out why. His research this afternoon had shown that this guy was as much a fraud of being a Russian immigrant as Mike Ross was a Harvard graduate. The only difference was that in the catering business one could not get prosecuted for not having gone to cooking school. However, one could go to jail for falsifying records and acting in a fraudulent manner. He wondered if Donna knew his Russian accent was fake and his background story of his mother and father exiting Communist Russia before the wall fell was just as false as Mike's presence in the New York Bar.

Again, as Harvey shared a laugh with his brother and noticed the men looking at his stunning wife, he wondered how Donna had fallen for this guy. She liked dangerous men, but she also liked honesty. That was the main reason he loved her because she was always the only one he could trust and also that she loved him with all his faults and vulnerabilities as well as his arrogant manner and overbearing ego. Donna saw through all that to the man he was inside. She always told him he was a good man even for a little too much arrogance. Harvey decided that they needed to clear the air when they got home.

Kate and Donna excused themselves for a trip to the ladies' room when Marcus' comment did not get a rise from Harvey.

"You are a million miles away. I just told you that a ghost of dad was haunting the kids and you didn't blink an eye. What's going on?"

Harvey smiled deferentially, took a drink of the last water in his water glass and said, "I think Donna may be cheating on me."

Marcus began to laugh. "There is no way in hell that wife of yours is doing anything like cheating on you. That woman loves you like I never seen a woman love a man. Not even my wife and we've haven't gone through half the shit that you and Donna have. Cheating on Harvey..." Marcus took a drink and finished his giggle.

"Well, she lied to me where she was going today. She admitted that. She was going to tell me when you interrupted us to say that Ray was sitting in the driveway."

"Harvey, when does Donna have time for an affair?" Marcus asked logically thinking whereas his brother's insecurities blocked his common sense. "Think. She works five days a week at the firm with you. Then she goes home to a rambunctious almost two year old and a four month old whom she is trying to wean from nursing. If you're home late, I'm sure she is waiting for you to see how you spent the rest of your day since she had left. Stop me when I'm wrong, Harvey..."

"No, I guess you have a point. She doesn't have much time. She did lie to me today for sure. I found out from the bride herself. She confirmed that Donna never had a seamstress appointment. Rachel told me that Donna's gown is still hanging in her mother's bedroom closet and that neither one of them had seen her today."

"Harvey, if you're that suspicious, confront her. See what her side is. You're a lawyer, isn't that your job?"

"I'm her husband not her lawyer. There are different rules for that as you know," Harvey said receiving his scotch from the waiter whom he had signaled.

"Yes, I know, and I highly doubt that Donna has broken any marriage laws."

"Well, we'll find out won't we?"

It was a nice ride home. Between the four of them, it was clear that Marcus and Kate had had the better time. Of course, they were not at odds with one another. In the morning, Kate was planning a shopping excursion into the center of town and she had employed Donna into babysit her and Marcus' three loud and rambunctious children. Harvey had planned to be there and would gladly join in helping. He had always enjoyed being an uncle and now that he was a father, himself, he felt at home around people younger than 10 years old. Donna had invited Rachel and Mike over since it was still the holiday and thought that everyone sitting around their fireplace with close friends and their family members was the best way to spend it. Harvey and Marcus were going to visit their mother again while Marcus was still in town. Harvey thought maybe if she was strong enough they could take her on a little excursion of their own.

The four of them came in laughing quietly over a quip Harvey had made about one of his more inane clients. Kate who managed to get a little tipsy with little food and lots of booze hiccupped as she asked Julia and Roberta about the collective bunch of children. Julia said everyone was well behaved and she read them a whole library of books before they fell asleep. Roberta had fallen asleep in the chair with one hand on Gordon's bassinet and the other a copy of "Fifty Shades of Grey" in her other.

They exchanged pleasantries. Marcus and Kate kissed everybody goodnight and amorously went to the guest bedroom to sleep. Before attempting to leave Donna invited Julia and her mother to stay the night as it was a long way home. Julia said they were staying in town and were planning a little Christmas shopping in the morning. Donna smiled and then helped awaken their mother. After accompanying them to the door, Donna went over to the bassinet and picked up her son. He was getting so big. She kissed him carefully on the forehead and kicking off her heels she carried her precious cargo in one arm and lifting her skirt with the other climbed the stairs to put the baby in his bed before she looked to where her husband had escaped and stand tall for the fight that was inevitably to ensue.

"Did you look in on Mandy before coming in here," Donna asked Harvey as she watched him remove his cufflinks, undo his tie, untuck his shirt from his pants. Before he finished undressing he looked over at Donna.

"Yes, I did. Gordon, ok?"

"Yes, he's sound asleep. He is getting quite large and heavy. He was wearing his Christmas onezie that mom bought him for Christmas. He looked like a little chubby baby elf," Donna said with a big smile. She saw Harvey turn around and he looked tired. He looked like he was not up to fighting just yet.

"Harvey? I think we need to finish that discussion we started before we went to dinner," Donna said as she watched him continue to run through his nightly routine of hanging up his clothes, discarding the dirty ones for the dry cleaners or washer and walk into the spacious bathroom for a quick relaxing shower. Harvey continued to walk by his wife in silence. He barely acknowledged her as she stood there and talked.

"Harvey!"

"Not now, Donna. I'm tired. Whatever discussion we started we can do it tomorrow." Harvey went into the bathroom and closed the door.

Donna knocked to make sure it was all right that she follow him in. There were still some bodily functions where they both observed common courtesy.

To Donna's dismay, she heard the shower go on. The door was not locked, so Donna took that to mean that she could go in if she wanted.

"Harvey, I know you're mad at me. It's happened before, but I think if you let me explain you see why I did what I did"

As she stared in the mirror, she could see glimpses of Harvey's naked body in the opaque shower doors. Donna's heart and desire to join her husband in the shower fired her up. She knew that if she were to drop naked in front of him in the shower he could not resist her, but she knew that in the morning the wall would be back up and they would pussyfoot around each other in front of Marcus and Kate who already suspected something was awry.

"Harvey, I really do not want to go to bed with you pissed at me. I know you've erected that emotional wall that I have to tear through in order to find out what you're thinking. Fight me, if you want to goddamnit, I thought we were well past this point in our relationship."

Suddenly the shower jerked off and Harvey slid open the doors in a rush. Taking his bathrobe from the hook and a towel from the rack he started to dry his hair and stare his wife in the eye.

"If you want to have it out then let's have it out, Mrs. Specter! If you tell me that you're having an affair with that oversexed, overbearing, faux Russian oaf, I'm going to say I thought you were. You were really clever, though. You fit in with your "visits" to the seamstress or to the hospice or during lunch for all I know!"

Donna did not know whether to laugh or cry. She knew he thought she was cheating on him. She had loved this man through thick and thin and he still did not trust her completely.

"Fourteen years, Specter! We have been together as man and wife for almost three and you are now accusing me of infidelities? Do you know how frigging crazy that sounds. Two of the last three years I have been pregnant and worked full time at your side five days a week, ten hours a day. Where the hell would I get time to have an affair?"

"I don't know, Donna, you tell me!" Harvey stormed back at her and threw the towel in the wash basket hidden in the corner of the bedroom. He had dressed in a t-shirt and pajama pants before removing his bathrobe and dropping underneath the covers. She was not getting a show tonight, he thought. I am not falling for her seduction tonight. I am mad and I am remaining mad.

"Good night Donna," Harvey said and turning away from her shut his light out leaving Donna in the lighted bathroom. She quickly undressed, hanging up her gown, and removing her makeup and undoing her coiffure slipped into her own nightclothes and snuggled under the covers turning away from Harvey facing the other side of their bedroom. The clock on the nightstand said 1:00 AM. Donna could not believe he was not allowing her to tell him the truth. Well in the daylight, they would have to have it out sooner or later. Preferably, Harvey would not due battle in front of Mike, Rachel, Marcus or Kate or, of course, the children. That would be the worst.

On the other side of the bed, Harvey sighed deeply. He hated being mad at his wife. His whole life surrounded her. At one time not so long ago it was hard for Harvey to realize this, however, once he did a whole new chapter had opened for him and Donna. Feeling bad about his behavior earlier, he turned over and saw the back of Donna's head. As usual a few strands of her hair had lain errantly on is pillow. He picked it up and gently put it with the rest. He could feel Donna's presence lying next to him, but she was too far away. He wanted her warmth next to him. He scooted closer to her and tentatively put his hand on her hip. He whispered so quietly that Donna was not sure she even heard him.

"You know I love you, Donna. We'll talk in the morning. I promise." He kissed the back of her head not knowing if she had heard him. He settled next to her leaving his hand on her hip.

Donna smiled from her side and knew that Harvey had just grown another three feet of emotional length. She knew he would keep his word and then she could tell him the horrible almost threatening experience she had suffered with that ass of a caterer, Sergei Patronov or Samuel Peach, which Donna discovered was his real identity. Among Donna's other stops she had gone into the public library and quickly used one of the computers for a little internet investigation. She did not like the results and once when Harvey had calmed to reasonable discussion again she was going to apologize and let him know what she found.


	14. Chapter 14 - The Wall

Chapter 14

The difficult night soon turned into the difficult day. Donna wanted to confront her husband first thing in the morning and tell him everything she wanted to tell him, but she had momentarily forgotten her promise to Marcus and Kate as they had made coffee and left very early for their shopping excursion. The children had still been asleep and Donna was feeding Gordon at the kitchen table.

"Have fun, you two. Don't worry about the kids. We'll be fine. Harvey's here and they love their Uncle Harvey," Donna said as she fed a spoonful of oatmeal into Gordon's little eager mouth.

A little later after everyone had been fed and dressed, Donna sat with Gordon on her lap, Amanda settled on Harvey's lap and their nephew and nieces sat on the floor while they all watched a cartoon version of "A Christmas Carol". For some strange reason it was one of Harvey's favorites. Last Christmas she and Amanda were in the hospital recovering from an auto accident and Amanda from pneumonia. That's when Harvey told her that she was pregnant with Gordon. Looking at his little cherubic face and big dark eyes, Donna could hardly believe what a difference a year could make.

Well, it had not been quite a year yet and Christmas was still some weeks away. Donna remembered that the final fitting of Rachel's wedding gown was coming up soon because the wedding was now only two weeks away. Donna wondered if Harvey would believe her when she said as Matron of Honor she had to be there. Plus she was helping Laura Zane with the last minute details. It was a good thing that Rachel had decided on a smaller affair than first envisioned because the whole affair would be lopsided considering that Mike had no family with which to celebrate.

"Harvey, are we going to talk today?" Donna asked. There had existed this uncomfortable silence between them that had not been present for a long time.

"Not in front of the children and certainly not in front of Marcus and Kate. We'll talk eventually. I'm going to put Amanda in her bed. She's fallen asleep." Harvey rose and took Amanda to her bedroom. The other three were still immersed in the television show. Donna placed Gordon in his bassinet which he seemed to be outgrowing and let him crow there while she played with him.

When Harvey returned he wordlessly picked up his son and decided to have a little father and son time while they watched the end of the program. Donna sat back and then decided she would get a cup of coffee from the pot she had just made not too long ago.

Donna sat at the kitchen table and carelessly looked at the newspaper which had arrived that morning. Suddenly she heard the TV shut off and Harvey's voice saying: "Hey kids let's go toss the football around?"

All three children were eager to go outside with Uncle Harvey even Regina and Fiona.

"I'm going to take Gordon outside, ok?" Harvey asked coming around the bend to ask Donna.

"Sure, just remember to bundle him up and don't accidentally throw him instead of the football," Donna joked.

"I think I can tell the difference between my son and a football," Harvey smirked. He then left the room.

Even later that day Harvey and Donna still had not talked. When Mike and Rachel and arrived after dinner and to share a bottle of Donna's favorite wine, they noticed the huge barrier between husband and wife. Mike and Rachel had, of course, known Marcus and Kate so all had enjoyed each other's company. The older children needed some attention for the first hour of the evening before it was their bedtime, so all joined in a game of Twister with them. Finally after Donna had gotten Gordon down for the next few hours, it was Amanda's turn. Rachel offered to read her a couple of books, so Donna could stay with the adults. Rachel cornered Donna in the kitchen making some light late night snacks.

"Donn?"

"Amanda asleep?" Donna asked not turning around to face Rachel. Donna knew what was coming but did not want to face her just yet.

"What's going on between you and Harvey? Did you have a fight?"

"That bad, uh. We just thought we were being so clever," Donna said facing Rachel as she stood leaning against the counter.

Donna took a swig of her wine and then noticed Kate had ventured into the kitchen as well.

"Is this where the wronged wives club meet?" Kate joked.

"Oh, great! You can tell Harvey and I have had a fight," Donna said as she noisily pulled a chair out from the table and plopped herself into it.

Rachel and Kate joined her and then when Marcus came looking for his wife, Kate whisked him away with her hand.

"I'm taking the guys to the bar, ok, ladies?" Marcus asked making sure he was not going to piss off any of the wives or almost wives.

"Go ahead, Marcus. We don't mind, do we?" Kate asked before Marcus' blonde head disappeared.

"No," Donna said quietly. She thought maybe Harvey would either come home drunk or in a better mood.

"No, of course not," Rachel said.

Harvey ventured once into the kitchen to leave the baby monitor in the kitchen with Donna. He said nothing to anyone as he left.

"Whew, what the hell happened?" Rachel wanted to know.

"Was there a blizzard overnight?" Kate asked at the cold shoulder Harvey had given his wife. Not even a kiss goodbye.

"Harvey's pissed at me," Donna said succinctly. "I don't think he has been this pissed at me since I was sleeping with Stephen Huntley three years ago."

"Who's Stephen Huntley and why were you sleeping with him?" Kate asked. She had not ever really known that Harvey and Donna's relationship had been just a working friendship up until three years ago. Since Harvey had always seemed over-the-moon about Donna and not afraid to show it to she and Marcus she assumed they had been in a physical romantic entanglement for the last 13 years.

Donna set her straight and then Rachel piped up and said," You know Harvey reverts to the old Harvey when he's not happy. He is usually so pleasant now and smiling and lets his love for you exude his being. I asked him a question about nothing and he nearly bit my head off."

"Yep, shades of old Harvey. I've been fighting with it now since late yesterday when I came home from the city," Donna confessed.

"Yes, what was all that about? You had an appointment with the seamstress about your dress? Why would you lie to him?" Rachel wanted to know since she did not have Donna's back when Harvey had called her the previous day.

"You mean you didn't?" Kate asked. "What's going on Donna? I thought I was only kidding when I ribbed you about another man?"

"Yes, I know you did, Kate. It really is stupid. So let me tell you..."

Donna told her sister-in-law and best friend how she became involved again with Sergei Patronov. She just wanted a catered party for Harvey's birthday in January. It was really innocent and Donna had had no intentions of anything with the oversexed caterer. However, Sergei had thought differently and she told them about what had transpired when she went to his shop the previous day and how he continually seemed to stalk her. He had left two voicemails today, but Donna never retrieved them. She was now scared to tell Harvey because she knew he was in such a state that he might just overreact and kill Sergei or just not believe Donna at all.

"Well, you have to tell him that's all there is to it, Donna," said Rachel

"I know. I have wanted to speak to him but he doesn't seem to want to talk to me."

"I don't think you've had much opportunity today, sweetie," Kate said. "You babysat our brood not to mention been busy with your two little ones and then made dinner and now you're entertaining us all. There's just been no time."

"I guess you're right," Donna agreed.

"Donna, one thing is for sure. Harvey loves you and once he knows what's going on with Sergei and the stalking he'll see your side. I think he would forgive you just about anything," Rachel said placing a comforting arm on Donna's as it lay on the table between them.

"I'll second that," Kate said as she raised her glass. "Hey, Donna, do you have any more of that wine that I'm not allergic to?"

"Sure. It's in the smaller refrigerator where we keep the wine and cold beer."

While the girls were hashing things out and advising Donna, Marcus took Harvey and Mike to a strip bar.

"Marcus, this is a strip joint. I didn't think you were allowed to do anything like this anymore," Harvey remarked looking incredulously at his younger brother.

"Rachel will kill me if she finds out I'm in here," Mike said.

"Well, then she won't find out," Harvey said.

"What about Donna?" Mike asked.

"Donna knew how many women I slept with until I decided to marry her, so I don't think she'll question me coming here. Besides with what's she's been doing lately I'd say it's only fair," Harvey said opening the door of the joint.

Mike looked at Marcus and then pulling Harvey back out of the joint stood on the street in the cold November air and decided to find out what in the world Harvey was talking about. Harvey looked at both his surrogate brother and biological brother and thought he was not going to say anything about what was happening between him and his wife. Besides Harvey was just a little drunk and did not care at the moment that up until late yesterday afternoon he had been a happily married man.

"What? You're chickening out now because of your wives or soon to be wife in your case buddy," Harvey said pointing a finger at Mike.

"Well, no one tells Harvey Specter where to go or with whom to go with...not even Donna...my wife," Harvey said as he hiccupped his way into the darkened strip joint.

Marcus and Mike looked at one another and thought the same thing. _We'd better keep an eye on him._


	15. Chapter 15 - The Wall Part 2

Chapter 15

Harvey awoke at the sound of the baby crying. He turned over to the other side of the bed and noticed that Donna was not beside him. When he came home from the strip joint with his brother and Mike last night, Donna had already been asleep.

 _What the hell did I do last night? My head is throbbing_. Harvey could feel his pulse on either side of his head and the sound of Gordon's cries did not help much to not exacerbate the pain. He rose and felt his stomach hit his feet and then come back up again. He ran into the bathroom and retched. _How much did I drink last night?_

He heard Donna run behind him as he still stood hung over the toilet.

"How much did you drink last night, Harvey?" Donna asked while she held a now quiet Gordon in her arms. "Are you ok? There's only been a couple of times I can remember you hung over, so you must have had a wild night."

Harvey was not in a good mood. Not only did he have a throbbing headache but he still had not had that talk he promised with Donna. He knew he should they should never spent this many days without speaking, but there had been no time. Harvey passed Donna and kissed his son on the way to the bedroom.

"Holy shit!" Harvey said as he looked at the clock on the bedside table. "Is Marcus, Kate, and the kids up?"

"Harvey, it's 11:00 am on a Sunday morning, what do you think?"

"You know...ugh..." Harvey started and then ran into the bathroom again and this time did a little more than dry heave.

"Yes, I know. You and Marcus were going to see your mother before the other half of the Specter family leaves tonight."

"Is Marcus in a bad a shape as I am?" Harvey wondered. He had no recollection of what had happened the previous evening.

"No, not at all. You don't remember anything about yesterday, do you?" Donna said to Harvey and then to the baby. "Daddy doesn't remember a thing, does he little guy?" Donna kissed the baby and Gordon started to smile. Donna then left Harvey alone in the bedroom while she carried Gordon into the nursery to dress him for the day.

Harvey moved from the toilet to the sink, splashed some cold water on his face, and then brushed his teeth. He decided he couldn't face the rest of the family right now, so he stripped and went into the shower.

When he emerged fifteen minutes later, Donna had laid out some comfortable clothes for him to wear. Her thoughtfulness of her to do this for him knowing he could barely raise his head was indicative of how she had always cared for him. Harvey had begun to feel bad about his feelings toward his wife. She was willing to talk to him about it, but the old Harvey-the Harvey that felt betrayed and felt he was better off alone-rose in him like the bile he had vomited earlier. Harvey knew he should do the adult thing and hear her out. Not only was it good for Harvey to understand Donna's side of things but it was imperative for the existence of their marriage. He was still in love with Donna and that's why those silly thoughts of her having an affair hurt so much. He never wanted to think of a life without her. Now that they had Amanda and Gordon, Harvey had an even harder time thinking how he could live without her love and loving care and support.

Harvey decided to dress and then have it out with his wife.

Marcus and Kate were in the guest bedroom alone for a few precious moments.

Kate's face looked concerned. Marcus took her in his arms and tried to comfort her as he told her of the night they had trying to keep Harvey on a leash.

"He almost went into the backroom with one of the hookers! I have never seen him react like that. He had better taste when he slept with every woman he met," despaired Marcus as he held Kate close.

"Where the heck did you guys go? To the "Dregs of Humanity Bar?" Kate asked sarcastically. She trusted her husband even when he would venture into one of those places . Kate was a strong woman and did not put up with bullshit. Marcus knew that if he had come into the house in half a bad a shape as Harvey, Kate would be on her way to Pearson Specter Litt to find a divorce lawyer which was funny because they were corporate lawyers.

"Not really. We were trying to take Mike on a bachelor outing before he gets hitched in a couple of weeks. Even he was in better shape than Harvey and Harvey has been around!"

"Sounds like he was feeling sorry for himself which is stupid," Kate said as she looked up at her tall blonde husband. "Do you think he's going to tell Donna what transpired last night?"

"Oh, she probably can figure it out. You know she has a "Harvey radar" and knows when he's been bad and good."

"Just like Santa Claus," Kate laughed. "Seasonal now, isn't she?"

"Very funny, my love," Marcus said and kissed her. "Well, I have to get Harvey ready to see mom then when we get back we'll start back for Boston."

"Say 'hi" to Lillian for me and for the kids. Give her these, too, ok?" Kate handed him three pairs of slipper socks. All three pairs had Christmas themes stitched into them.

"I'm sure she will love these. I love you," Marcus said as he kissed his wife.

"Ewwww!" exclaimed their three children as they had escaped Aunt Donna and found their parents in the guest bedroom.

Marcus and Kate just smiled.

Unfortunately, life for the other half of the Specter family was not quite as convivial. Harvey had all the intentions of talking to Donna about not only his faux pas but hers as well. However, Marcus said they should have a heart-to-heart when he and his family are on their way back to Boston. That way there would be no interruptions except from their own children.

As Harvey drove to the hospice to see their mother, he squinted at the bland sunlight coming through the windshield. He had donned his sunglasses and then Marcus spotted something on Harvey's neck.

"Dude! Did that hooker leave a hickey on you?" Marcus cried as he had glanced at Harvey's neck.

Harvey quick looked in the rearview mirror.

"What the hell...damn Donna!"

"Damn Donna? I don't think you have a leg to stand on after last night."

"Damn Donna. She didn't say a damn word, but I know she saw this and knew that I was hung over. She laid these clothes out on the bed for me to wear on purpose. Just to humiliate me," Harvey said as he turned the steering wheel of his Audi just a little sharply.

"Watch it, Harve. I liked to see Christmas if you don't mind. Do you want me to drive?"

"No, I'm fine!"

"No, you are not. Pull over."

Harvey thinking that Marcus was right pulled over on the side of the road and traded seats with his brother.

The rest of the trip was silent. Harvey had actually dozed off having momentary horrible dreams of his wife laughing at him and she taking his children away from him so far away that they would come to believe horrible stories of their father-just like the horrible truth of he and Marcus' mother and her constant infidelities until finally leaving after many, many years.

"Harvey, we're here." Marcus put the car in "Park" and turned off the engine. "You, ok?"

"Not really. Hey, Marcus, don't say anything about last night or anything about me and Donna, ok?"

"Sure. I got your back," Marcus said giving his brother a faux punch.

The Specter brothers entered the facility. They both signed the visitor's log. Harvey's curiosity about Donna's escapade on Black Friday reared its ugly head. He surreptitiously paged through the log looking for the visitors on November 26, Black Friday.

Before Marcus had called Harvey to get down the corridor to Lillian's room, Harvey had all the information he needed.

With all the occurrences happening between he and his wife and how badly Harvey was feeling physically, his thoughts turned to his mom and her unfaithfulness to their father. He became a little more reserved and quiet and staunch. Shades of old "you betrayed dad" Harvey surfaced in his demeanor. Marcus knew why but he did not want any of the more recent events ruin the progress he and his mother had made in healing their relationship.

"Hi Harvey! I'm so glad to see you, too," Lillian had said as he bent down for a perfunctory kiss.

"Oh, Donna and me wanted to give you this from us and the kids," Harvey said quietly as he handed his mother a flat wrapped package.

Lillian smiled. "Do I have to wait until Christmas or can I open it now?"

"Do whatever you wish, mom. It's up to you," Harvey said and then turned away to face out the window of the small room.

Marcus and Lillian shared pleasantries and said their goodbyes. He heard his mother's delight in seeing the slippers that Marcus and his family had given to her. Then he heard crackling of the wrapping paper that had encased his mother's present.

"Oh Harvey it's beautiful!" Lillian said. She smiled wide and then looked up at her elder son as he had not turned from the window.

"I will keep this next to the portrait of Marcus and his family. When did you have this done?" Lillian had asked.

Harvey then sniffed and turned around.

"We had it made about a month ago. We took pictures mainly for Christmas cards, but Donna wanted a special one for you," Harvey said. "Excuse me."

"What's wrong with Harvey?" Lillian wanted to know.

"You don't need to know, mom. It's between him and Donna," Marcus said smiling lopsidedly. He rubbed his mom's shoulders in comfort.

"How are you fairing? Any bad reactions to the medication or any good reactions?" Marcus asked hoping that Harvey would return.

"Well, you know, Marcus, I'm terminal, so whatever they are doing they are trying to keep me comfortable. They don't really expect a cure at this point," Lillian said placing her hand over Marcus' as it continued to rub her shoulder.

Lillian knew of Harvey's struggles with trust which he fully admitted to in one of his first visits. He blamed her. Well, in thinking back, she really couldn't blame him for thinking that. However, in the end, one had to live with the decisions one made and the consequences from that. She knew that he and Donna had not talked about Donna's problem with that caterer guy because once he listened to her his love for her should and probably would surmount the obstacle.

What happened really? Lillian had no cause not to believe Donna. Donna had been very shaken when she came to see her the other day so unexpectedly. Lillian did not doubt Donna's love for her son. Her eyes lit up when she talked about him. She was proud of the man he had become. Harvey's eyes and demeanor were completely different when he talked about Donna. His face lit up like a Christmas tree when he spoke about his children.

Before Lillian died, she wanted to make sure that all was well not only between her and Harvey but between his wife and Harvey. Lillian Specter regretted what she had done but took her own advice and lived with the decisions she had made. No matter the consequences.

Lillian took a stroll around the center with Marcus and they settled in the central living area where there were plush chairs and a television and a quiet corner for card games or light refreshment. This was where they found Harvey. He had escaped apparently to think his own thoughts. Lillian knew he was reliving those moments when he had accidentally caught his mom in her affairs.

"So this where you ran off, dickhead," Marcus said quietly to Harvey as Harvey stood in front of the large bay window staring out at the cloudy sky.

"Is mom here?" Harvey asked not looking behind him.

"Yes, she wants to talk to you."

"I should not have come, Marcus. I'm not up to this right now," Harvey said.

"Just try. Mom really needs to talk with you," Marcus pleaded.

Harvey turned around silently and faced his mother who sat behind him on the end of the couch which stood in the corner of the room. It afforded a small bit of privacy of which Harvey was glad because he really did not want to have the entire hospice hear his private issues.

Lillian said, "Harvey come over here. I think I know what's bothering you."

"No you don't. Look, mom, I'm sorry. I am just not in the mood for visiting today," Harvey said and smiled. He took a good look at his mother. It was the first time he actually saw his mother since he had arrived. Harvey smiled regretfully and kissed his mom on the cheek as he sat down. Her hair which was once a vibrant dirty blonde was thinning and her deep dark eyes loomed large and sunken into her face. Her arms and body were thinning. She looked very frail and not the woman he had confronted only a month ago standing inside the lobby of the firm's building. Harvey felt ashamed of his feelings now.

"Look, Harvey, you are a big boy. However, I want you to do something for me."

"What, mom? Do you want a bigger Christmas present?" Harvey asked out of the side of his mouth.

"No. I want you to go home and talk with your wife. You know she came here the other day, right?"

"Donna said she had come here," Harvey admitted even as he held the incriminating visitor's log signed with her name on it. No one could forge her signature. He ought to know. He tried a couple of times just for practice. He would get as far as the "Donna" but her "Specter" left a lot to be desired.

Harvey did have a question, though, why would Donna come to see his mother? Donna had said to see how she was doing since the day before had been quite an excursion for an older sickly woman. Maybe it wasn't, though? Maybe Donna was trying to find more subtle ways to hide infidelities? Who better to turn for secret affair advice then the queen herself?

Harvey kissed his mom on the cheek and wished her a Merry Christmas. He had said he was not sure when he would be back but that he would wait until Marcus was finished with his visit. Harvey pled that he had to find someone about the bill. That was an excuse and they both knew it but felt they could not keep Harvey from leaving.

Harvey went to the car and decided he would wait for Marcus there.

While Harvey and Marcus were at the hospice, Donna did laundry and helped Kate pack for their trip back to Boston. It was early afternoon and she had just finished feeding Gordon who had fallen asleep with a full tummy. Donna this time had stopped breast feeding and was uncomfortable in a tight bra trying to stop her milk flow. She noticed as she looked down at herself that her Dona Karan sweater had two milk stains where she had leaked. Donna slammed the dryer door shut with a bang and then noticed her sister-in-law standing at the bottom of the stairway into the basement.

"I think it will come out. I can't tell you how many pieces of clothing and bras I ruined trying to wean my three each time," Kate said as she came closer and patted Donna's arm comfortingly.

"It's not that that I'm pissed. Did you see the hickey or mark on Harvey's neck?" Donna asked Kate.

"No, but then I don't get that close to him, hon," Kate said.

"Well he came to bed and I pretended to be asleep. I heard him mumbling, so I knew he was drunk. He never says squat when he's sober. At least not since this Sergei crap," Donna said taking a seat on one of the summer chairs they had stored in the basement.

Kate, with her dark head bowed, and her arms folded across her chest leaned against the dryer and asked the inevitable question.

"What did he say?"

"He mumbled some egotistical crap about how he still had it and how he had this woman in the palm of his hand and that he accused me of being just like his mother. He accused me in his drunkeness of seeking the advice of a known cheater because I needed to hide it from him!"

"Did you confront him about any of this earlier today?"

"No, he didn't remember a damn thing. He just retched and vomited into the toilet while I stood there. However, I did lay out clothes for him to wear this morning, so no one within six inches of him could not fail notice that...hickey...or whatever it was on his neck. I hope he was embarrassed in front of his mother."

"Don't tell Marcus I told you, but he and Mike had a very hard time keeping him away from the women in the joint."

"Who the strippers?" Donna wondered. That was not Harvey's style. If he wanted to sleep with a woman he usually picked from the top of the tree. Harvey had been promiscuous when single not stupidly so, though.

"No, the hookers that worked that particular joint. Apparently they wanted to take Mike out for one last bachelor evening and wound up at a strip joint where they pimped women."

"That is so unlike Harvey. Even when he was desperate for affection he never stooped that low. Did Marcus say that Harvey actually slept with this woman?"

"No, Marcus and Mike dragged his ass out and away when they noticed how bad Harvey had become. He passed out in the car on the way home. They took Mike back because I called Marcus to see how bad things had been because I instinctively knew there was a problem with Harvey. I told him to drop Mike off at his apartment because Rachel had gone home herself."

"Did you see Harvey when he came in?"

"No, I didn't, Donna. I'm sorry," Kate said apologizing.

"Sorry for what. This is all my fault. At least I know he didn't actually cheat on me. I wonder if he realizes that?"


	16. Chapter 16 - Two Weeks After

Chapter 16 - Two Weeks After

Harvey stood in the bathroom at Pearson Specter Litt and pulled down the collar of his white starched cotton shirt. He looked at the large strawberry colored bruise just under his left ear. As he contrived to see the harshness of the mark, Harvey caught sight of his platinum diamond encrusted wedding band. He momentarily stopped looking at his neck and focused on his wedding ring. He knew what that ring represented. That ring represented the commitment that he faithfully and wantonly made with Donna three years ago. The same commitment that Rachel and Mike would be making in a couple of weeks.

When Harvey had returned from his visit with his mother, he avoided Donna like the plague. He knew she had seen his bruised neck. He knew because she said she had purposely laid out a low neck shirt to embarrass him. That was so unlike Donna. She did everything in the world to protect him. She was really pissed at him, but then again he was really pissed with her. It had now been two weeks since Donna's "betrayal" and Harvey's almost recompense. They put on a good show for Amanda who at almost two was as perceptive as her mother. Harvey never wanted to have a situation like the one he had lived with for so many years. He knew Donna wanted to talk about their situation but ever since Marcus and his family had returned to Boston she had been carrying a grudge of her own. They tried to talk once which only resulted in a screaming match ending with Harvey sleeping in the guest room or on the end of his daughter's bed when she woke one night after a bad dream and went looking for him.

"Jessica, is this not the men's bathroom?"

"It's my goddamn firm, I can go wherever the hell I want including the men's bathroom," Jessica said sternly staring at Harvey and he knew instinctively she had seen the mark on his neck and the strained behavior between husband and wife.

"I suppose you're here because you have noticed a problem between my secretary and me," Harvey ventured calling his wife by her professional title rather than the personal one.

"Yes, I have noticed a problem between you and your wife. You missed a deposition yesterday without even a call to say where you were or have "your secretary" cover your ass for you. I think that must be the first time in 12 years where Donna had no clue where you were."

"Jessica..."

"Come to my office. Both of you," Jessica said. She did not like to see discord in her "house" but when it was there she needed it resolved one way or another. These two she loved like her family. Harvey had grown into a fine partner and when he finally came to the realization that his professional and personal life revolved around Donna Jessica was sincerely happy. However, she had warned them of the consequences of working with the same person with whom you slept.

A few moments later, Harvey and Donna paraded through her glass office door.

"You wanted to see us?" Donna asked.

"Yes, I did. Come sit on the couch. I want a word with you two," Jessica said.

"Now, I am not normally nosy but when I see my name partner and his secretary fall out of sync and said name partner doesn't make a deposition that she supposedly scheduled, I get a little agitated and worried about how the rest of my day will pass. Now, the whole Pearson Specter Litt family on every goddamn floor of this firm knows how much you love one another and how much you two are meant to be together. In a couple of weeks I am going to have another married couple under my roof. At least for them they seem to be setting a better example than you two are doing."

"Jessica, it's between Donna and me..." Harvey started to say.

"Cut the bullshit, Specter," Jessica said standing as Harvey had just done. "Do not be airing your dirty laundry in any way, shape, or form in my house. Now I have warned you about the dangers of working and living together and somewhere in the by-laws I do remember a line about prohibiting office romances or married people working close together. Now I am not against you two being together, in fact, one of your strengths was that you work like a well-oiled machine. However, you miss another deposition or stop acting like a name partner in this firm and one or both of you will be gone. Got it?"

Donna turned her head away for a moment to blot a watery eye. "Got it. Is that all Jessica?"

"Yes, that's all Donna. Thank you."

Harvey lingered a little longer. Jessica had always been like Harvey's big sister. Mentoring him from his first days in the mailroom to his stint as an Assistant District Attorney for Cameron Dennis, Jessica had always been a nonjudgmental vent for his feelings. Later their conversations were about his success in the firm or how they were going to handle a hostile takeover or how to keep a limit on Louis' emotional shenanigans now and again. Never had it been this personal until now. When he and Donna were married, Jessica had given her" don't let your marriage problems become your working together problems" speech. Then they both thought how ridiculous it sounded. Apparently, though, as time had passed, Jessica had known of what she spoke.

"Harvey? Was there something else you wanted to discuss?" Jessica said moving back to her desk to return to her brief.

"I just wanted to apologize for our behavior. We've been going through a thing that happened during Thanksgiving break."

"I saw you Black Friday and you were ok. What happened?"

Harvey looked at her for a moment and decided not to say anything.

"It's between Donna and me. I'd rather not discuss it."

"Suit yourself, but you better not make Mike cover another deposition for you. He was not prepared. However, he did a great job considering he knew nothing about the client. He's a fifth year now. You can't expect him to be at your beck and call anymore. You taught him well, Harvey."

"Thank...you?" Harvey smiled. "I'll make sure I have everything ok in our house before we bring it into yours this time."

"Yes, it is so much better working with you when you and Donna are not at odds. Now get the hell out of my office," Jessica said amusedly dismissing him.

Harvey walked out Jessica's door and then on the way to his office he became distracted again by a visit from his mother's doctor.

"Mr. Specter," Dr. Jeff Tulane had addressed him.

"Dr. Tulane? What is it? Is my mother ok?" Harvey asked hurriedly as he walked toward his office from the elevator bank.

"My office is just down this way," Harvey said as he walked with Dr. Tulane swiftly down the hall.

When he saw Donna he said, "Let the phones go to voicemail and come in here."

"Already done, Harvey."

Donna was the last into the office and shut the thick glass door behind her. She took a seat next to Harvey on the couch while Dr. Tulane sat in far end chair away from the door which afforded a little more privacy in that it was harder to hear. Donna had turned off the intercom, so no one walking by her desk could hear their private conversations. The intercom would be turned back on the minute Donna resumed her seat outside of Harvey's office.

"It must be nice working with your wife, Mr. Specter. Mine is nurse, but the hospital regulations doesn't allow us to work on the same floor. I'm glad you're here, Mrs. Specter, so I can tell the both of you at the same time," Dr. Tulane began.

"What is the problem, doctor? Has Lillian become worse?" Donna wanted to know.

"Yes, she has. She has started to become delirious or in and out of present time. She also has lost the use of her legs. It is not unusual in her case for a patient to lose faculties so suddenly. It just means that the tumor has moved or grown to the point where it is pressing on vital areas," Dr. Tulane said carefully.

"Should I call my brother and his family to be here?" Harvey asked very concerned. Dr. Jeff Tulane was a man around Harvey's age with a serious turn to his chin and compassionate worry lines under his eyes.

"I don't think she's quite at the end yet, but it doesn't hurt to be prepared. However, the reason I came here is that she is asking for the both of you. There was something she especially wanted you both to hear at the same time."

Harvey and Donna looked at one another and at once they were both embarrassed at the events that were tearing them apart.

"I already cancelled your last three appointments for today," Donna said looking at her husband. She saw tears well up in his eyes and knew that Harvey was feeling bad about how his last visit had gone with his mother. He blamed her for the predicament Harvey and she found themselves.

"You always know," Harvey said softly to her as she rose to accompany Harvey and Dr. Tulane to the elevators.

Donna's smile was brittle at Harvey's loving comment.

"We'll arrange for a sitter and be there in a few minutes," Harvey said shaking Dr. Tulane's hand.

He turned to Donna then and said, "Call Marcus and tell him to get here fast. No, let me do that. I have an idea. Contact your mother to see if she can stay with the kids. Tell her she may have to stay overnight."

"Already done. My mother wanted to stay anyway because she knew I had that I was to accompany Rachel for her final fitting tomorrow."

Harvey looked surprised. "Oh, ok," was the only thing that Harvey said, however, the look he gave his wife said so much more.

When they had arrived at the hospice they were taken to a normal hospital room in another section of the hospice. Lillian lay sleeping with a respirator mask on her face. Harvey looked at Donna with a look as if he was going to punch someone in the face.

"Let's try to talk to her, Harvey. The doctor said that would be good for her. Keep her in the present and aware," Donna advised Harvey.

"She didn't look like this a couple of weeks ago when Marcus and me were here. She was talking. We even sat in the lounge before I decided to wait in the car for Marcus to say his goodbyes. She looked frail but not like this." Harvey was horrified. His father's death happened in a vacuum. He had been made a junior partner and he had been missing Zoe Lawford. She had moved out of the corporate floor and gone onto the financial end of the business. Donna had come into his office and had told him in tears that his father had had a heart attack and he was gone.

This was so much different. His mother whom he had hated all his life except for the last couple of months was quickly deteriorating before his eyes. Dr. Tulane thought it was not the end for her, but he could not be sure. Marcus and his family were already in a plane bound for New York. Harvey didn't care. He would pay anything so his mother could have both her sons here if it was her time. Harvey did not want to think it was the end, but Donna knew and that was all Harvey had ever needed to focus his thoughts. Donna knew things instinctively, intuitively, and every other way, so he knew his thoughts that this was not the end had been wishful thinking.

"Harvey? Donna?"

"Hey, mom, we heard we should come see you. Heard you missed us." Harvey said softly. He felt the stinging of tears beckon in his eyes. In a million years, he never thought he would weep for his mother.

"Come here both of you," Lillian said beckoning with her hand. She had removed the oxygen mask and held it up.

"Don't let this thing fool you," Lillian said. "I just need a little more oxygen sometimes. It's nothing."

"Sure it's not, Lillian...mom Specter," Donna corrected herself knowing that if she were having her last days that's the attitude she would have. Donna came to sit on the end of the bed and Harvey took a chair and sat it next to his mother's bed.

"We called Marcus and Kate. They will be here in a few hours," Harvey said.

"Why? I'm not planning to go anywhere just yet," Lillian said looking as if someone just took her puppy away.

"You're irresistible, what can I say? I know you're not planning to go anywhere yet," Harvey said.

"I wanted to see the both of you because I need to say something. I've been lying here for a few hours not able to get up or even change the channel on the stupid TV, so I have been able to do nothing but think. Now I want to say to you something that should be said because I think you two have fallen into a misunderstanding and it seems that when you extrapolate it someone blames me."

"We're fine, Mom Specter, really," Donna said as she reached for Harvey's hand. He took it and put his other over it and gave Donna a smile. Not a Specter spectacular but one that said "I love you and we need to get through this."

Lillian asked about Amanda and Gordon and both Donna and Harvey had some great little videos on their iPhones that they proudly showed Lillian. She remarked how Gordon was looking more like Donna now but had Harvey's dark brown eyes and that Amanda's beautiful red hair was getting very wavy. Donna's phone had a little video of Amanda holding Gordon giving a message to their Grandma Lillian.

"Marcus always had the curliest hair, but Harvey had beautiful ash blonde hair as well. I remember when I had him. All the nurses thought he was too cute and too pretty to be a boy."

Donna grimaced at Harvey almost telepathically telling him that she wondered what he looked like when he was a baby.

Marcus arrived with Kate and their kids, so Donna and Harvey decided to take a breather outside. It was not long before Harvey pounced on Donna.

"Do you know something I don't know about my mother's condition? That little video of Amanda talking to my mother seems a little too fortuitous."

"Harvey, calm down. I don't know what you're thinking about anything lately. No, I don't know any more than you do about Lillian's condition. I just thought it would be cute next time we visited that Amanda had a special message for a grandmother she probably won't remember when she's older."

"I just think that maybe Black Friday when you saw my mother that you and she exchanged notes on how to keep extramarital affairs secret."

"There's the real crux of the matter, Specter, isn't it? We never talked about what happened Black Friday and you've imagined this whole affair that I've been having because I told one white lie about where I had been."

"Donna, now is not the place nor the time to have it out here. We'll talk and then you're going to come clean because I know you lied to me and you know you lied to me."

"You know what, Specter, that little strawberry bruise on your neck didn't come from me sucking the life out of you but some other woman whom it seems you don't remember. You talk about coming clean. You lied to me by appropriately placed omission!'

"You've been working for me way too long. You're starting to sound just like a lawyer. Look, I don't remember what happened that night. I really don't. Can you understand that?"

Donna's eyes brimmed with tears and Harvey immediately regretted his tone and the argument that ensued. The last thing he could ever tolerate were Donna's tears. Through the years, He had witnessed enough assholes make her cry not realizing that he was probably one of the first ones after that night twelve years ago. He thought he had rectified that by finally admitting his love and marrying her.

Harvey knew he was not above blame for his own behavior. He was lying to her now saying he did not remember that Sunday night at the strip joint. He had an epiphany about that night earlier that day during some quiet time between appointments. That was why he had forgotten about the deposition. Actually he had told Donna to postpone the deposition in plenty of time. Maybe she did not postpone it on purpose, but Harvey knew he had been an asshole to her the last couple of weeks by holding a grudge when he was no better himself for taking his anger out with him to a dingy nightclub and let an over made up whore sit on his lap and suck the life out of his neck. He could remember Marcus and Mike pulling the woman off Harvey's lap and then Harvey retaliating by pushing her into Mike's lap to see what would happen.

"She's eager. Careful, tiger, he's getting married in a couple of weeks," Harvey had warned.

When Mike pushed her away with a couple of bucks in her thong, Harvey said, "Hey, if you don't want her, I'll take her."

Marcus then pushed his brother back into the booth and said, "Remember, Donna? Your wife? She would leave you in a minute if you did what you think you want to do."

Fortunately when the next memory hit him, Donna had been away from her desk because Harvey had bowed his head and run into the men's room when he remembered what he had said next to his brother and friend, "She's cheating on me, boys! I know she is."

Mike had then laughed it off and said, "You know what, Harvey, you get delusional when you're drunk. Donna would no more cheat on you than I would on Rachel. So my advice, and I can't believe I'm giving the Great Harvey Specter advice, is get your head out of your ass, go home, and talk to that beautiful woman whom you love and get this shit straightened out. You are tearing your own marriage apart and can't even see it!"

Harvey then had taken one more swig of hard liquor he could no longer taste and allowed himself to be thrown in the back of his own Audi and let Marcus drive them back to the house after dropping Mike off at his apartment.

The thought of how, he a happily married man, was acting with a bimbo who happened to see a man who was hurting and took advantage for a little extra cash sobered Harvey's mood for the rest of the day, so when he and Donna had received a lecture from Jessica, Harvey was almost ready to make Donna go home for the rest of the day because he had not wanted to look at her until he could be calm and be prepared to hear what she had to say and to confess his own sin to her in return.

Marcus and Kate did not return with Harvey and Donna as they were not staying at their West Chester House but at the Manhattan condo. It had not taken too long for Kate to observe that the other Specter husband and wife were still at odds with one another.

Kate had excused herself from the Lillian's hospital room leaving Marcus and their children in the room.

"Where's Harvey?" Kate asked as he had not returned to Lillian's room.

"I'm not sure. Probably went to get coffee," Donna said sitting on a chair directly outside of Lillian's room.

"Did you guys ever discuss what happened over the Thanksgiving weekend?"

"No. Every time he looks like he wants to discuss things he suddenly puts that wall up again. We tried again after we got here and all we did was wind up screaming at each other again."

"Well, of course, you don't want to have the talk here, silly goose," Kate said as she put her arm around Donna's shoulder. It was so strange for Donna to have someone to comfort her and give her advice usually it was the other way around. However, lately, it seemed Donna had been receiving in return what she had freely donated through the years.

"I know," Donna responded as she spotted her husband carrying two paper cups of coffee.

When he arrived in front of them, "I'm sorry, Kate. I didn't know you would be out of mom's room already."

"Don't worry about it, Harvey," Kate responded as she rose from the chair next to Donna's. "Marcus and I are going to take the kids to eat somewhere close and then I will probably take them to the hotel across town which you so generously provided us."

"Thank Donna. She's does all my dirty work for me," Harvey said smiling.

"Then 'thank you' Donna," Kate said and kissed Donna on the cheek and returned to Lillian's room.

As Harvey and his wife sat there drinking their coffee in silence, Harvey noticed the alternate doctor on his mother's case - Dr. Shipley.

When Dr. Shipley approached Harvey and Donna, they both rose out of their chairs.

"Dr. Shipley," Harvey said shaking the man's hand and then Dr. Shipley did the same to Donna.

Dr. Shipley was younger than Harvey and had just begun his residency at St. Vincent's Hospital. He did part time work as Dr. Tulane had been an older friend showing him the ropes of the medical world. Dr. Tulane thought since Dr. Shipley specialty was geriatric medicine that he would be invaluable in this case.

"I'm glad to see you here, Mr. and Mrs. Specter," Dr. Shipley said. "I just wanted to let you know that it looks like your mother's condition may have stabilized for a little bit. Her last test showed that the tumor had actually moved and that is why her legs are not working properly and her memory keeps wavering between past and present. However, anything could happen suddenly, so I would appreciate it if you could keep close."

"That's no problem, doctor. We do have a home here and can remain close," Harvey said. "I presume you would want to reiterate this information to my brother and his wife. They are both in there."

"Yes, I will gladly inform them myself. If you'll excuse me," Dr. Shipley said and proceeded to knock on Lillian's door.

"Well, I guess I can phone mom and tell her we'll be home soon," Donna said as she reached into her purse for her phone.

"Donna. Call Ray and have him take you home to the condo and also have him take Kate and the kids to the hotel you booked. I'm staying here and I am sure my brother will do the same."

"Harvey, I understand you want to stay, but you heard Dr. Shipley."

"Yes, he said things could change quickly."

"They could also remain the same. She's stabilized," Donna argued back.

"Look, Donna, if this was your mother and you wanted me to leave I would leave," Harvey reasoned.

"Yes, you probably would. This isn't about your mother perhaps dying. This goes back to your father's death. You have always felt bad that you weren't there when the end came."

"Donna. Let's not say anything else to each other that we can't take back. This has nothing to do with my father's death. I'm not trying to play the martyr now because my mother may pass at any moment. I try to see dad's grave every year you know that."

"I have to check on my mom and the kids anyway, but just tell me one thing," Donna asked holding her phone in her hand ready to dial Ray.

"Are you avoiding me?"

"No, I'm not avoiding you. I don't hedge situations where I know it might be difficult."

"You used to. Then you didn't and now, yeah, you are. However, if you think you're not, then make me a promise...two actually."

"What are they?" Harvey asked.

"That it's ok for me to return as I get all your affairs settled both professionally and personally..."

"Agreed, Donna, of course..."

"...and that if your mother's condition hasn't changed in a few hours that we will find somewhere private in this place and talk about what happened Thanksgiving weekend? "

Harvey hesitated again. He knew they needed to talk but again that old emotional release was not coming voluntarily like it had been coming so recently.

Harvey lowered his head and then looking at his wife he said, "Of course. We're going to need a lot of coffee."

Donna just smiled and dialed her phone


	17. Chapter 17 - Hurting

Chapter 17

Donna returned to the hospital a couple of hours later as she explained everything to her mother and her children. She explained the best she could to Mandy who probably did not quite get it. All Mandy may have heard was that mommy and daddy weren't going to be home tonight. Donna felt bad because she and Harvey had not spent as much time with their children as a cohesive unit has they usually did since they were born. Roberta understood, though, and told Donna not to worry. While home, Donna also called all of Harvey's appointments for the next couple of days to delay or postpone or cancel altogether. Some she could not cancel or postpone until the morning when court opened. He was due in court on that Friday morning or maybe she would just have Mike take first chair. He knew all about the case and he could include Rachel as second chair since she was becoming proficient in litigation as Mike had become. Donna knew Harvey well enough professionally that she knew he would trust Mike in this case.

When Donna did walk back into the hospital wing of the hospice, Harvey had flagged her down. She handed him a backpack.

"What this?" Harvey asked.

"I thought you might need a change of clothes and your shaving kit," Harvey said taking the backpack.

"Thank you," Harvey said and then kissed her cheek.

"How's your mom?"

"Same. The doctors told both Marcus and me to go home and that they would call."

"So, what are you going to do?"

"I thought I would stay here a little longer and let Marcus go to the hotel to Kate and the kids. We'd said we would take turns."

"Harvey, this could go on for weeks. I cancelled what I could for the rest of the week, but I called Mike and told him he would have to try Friday's case for you. I assume you do not want me to go any further with your appointments for next week."

"No, I guess we'll have to take one day at a time for right now. Thank you for telling Mike about Friday. I will tell him to take Rachel as second chair. I was going to take her anyway. Give her a little exposure to a real courtroom."

"I already told him that. He and Rachel sent their best wishes."

"That was nice of them. They both probably thought I was nuts considering all the years I shunned my mother like the plague."

Donna put a hand on Harvey's shoulder comfortingly. "No they don't. They understand."

"Hey," Harvey said stepping a little closer and speaking quietly. "Are you ready for that talk?"

"Sure. Did you find a place where we can go?"

"They said we could use mom's regular room if we needed. That way they would be able to get a hold of us."

"Ok. Let's go," Donna said as Harvey took her hand in his. Donna looked at him and he looked like he had fought a war all by himself. Harvey's dark brown eyes were rimmed in red and watery. His hair was all over the place and his suit jacket was no longer with him. He also had removed his tie, his shirtsleeves were rolled up, and his shirt open revealing his white undershirt.

When they arrived back at his mother's normal room, Donna turned on the light in the living space and put down her handbag. She walked over to the mini refrigerator that the patients were allowed to keep in their rooms. As she took out two cans of ginger ale, she asked.

"So, where do you want to start?"

Harvey took the can of ginger ale that Donna offered wishing it were something a little stronger. He thought he definitely wanted to have something strong especially when he was going to have this talk.

"Where did you go...no why did you go to see that fake Russian womanizer? You aren't or weren't having an affair with him, were you? Why did you lie to me?" Harvey's pleading tone sounded as if his heart was broken. Donna was the only woman he really ever loved and he wanted to believe the truth that he meant just the same to her.

"Ok, Harvey, here's what really happened. A couple of months ago when we had Rachel's shower, I really admired Sergei's work. The food was wonderful and his staff was fabulous. So I know that your 45th birthday is coming up in January, and I wanted to throw you a surprise party. Now, I know you hate surprises but this was all about you..."

"My favorite kind of party..." Harvey smirked and sniffed.

"So, I didn't feel, nor do I have time to do all that research and all I needed was the food. I thought I could just arrange with him to pick up the food at his place once I had made the choices. Well, the first time I went to see him I had Mandy and Gordon with me but it didn't seem to stop him from making goo-goo eyes at me."

"Goo-goo eyes? What are we in junior high?" Harvey asked not believing what word his wife just used for a man who obviously had more on his mind than catering food.

"So why did you go back? Especially after what had happened _at_ Rachel's party! I assume this second visit happened on Black Friday when you told me you had a fitting for your dress for Rachel's wedding." Harvey took a sip of his ginger ale.

Donna who had been standing at the little counter took a seat on the little couch provided in the small room. Donna had changed when she had returned home from her work dress and heels to her blue jeans, a blue sweater and her white Nikes. She took a sip of her drink and looked at her husband who sat on the arm of the chair across from her. They were close enough to hold hands. Not that they did but they were that close in the small room.

"In answer to your question, I went back because he said that he had some different foods that he wanted me to taste for your party. So I reluctantly agreed to see him. He insisted that it had to be on Black Friday because the chef was only going to be in town for that day."

"Donna, you are always so intuitive. Couldn't you tell he was trying to trap you?" Harvey asked concernedly.

"Yes, I did, but I went anyway. I had already made the deposit for your party, so I told my lie and I went."

"What happened? Why were you gone all day? You had told Kate you were only going to be a couple of hours because you knew we were all going out that night."

"Harvey, nothing happened..."

"Something happened because you came to see my mother and when I saw her that Sunday after, she told me to talk to you because she felt something was wrong between us because I behaved so guardedly around her like I used to."

"Harvey, you promise me you won't go punch him out or trump a lawsuit against him if I tell you what happened?"

"Oh...," Harvey said becoming alarmed. His mind was doing somersaults wondering what could have happened to her. He hoped she hadn't been...raped.

"What did that son of a bitch do? Did he hurt you? Rape you?" Harvey was warming to his tune and beginning to get hot.

"He made a couple of passes. He tried to cop a few feels of my breasts and my ass," Donna said offhandedly like she was used to having men not her husband stick their hands down her blouse and try to cup her breast.

"That son of a bitch. I'm gonna kill him," Harvey said rising from his sitting position and swiftly pacing the floor.

"Harvey! I was shaken and I knew I couldn't go home like that, so I came to see your mother and I told her what had happened."

"Why didn't you tell me? I'm your husband and your lawyer! You come to me when things like that happen, so my mind doesn't think you betrayed me. I would have come and got you. We could have left the car in Manhattan. Any number of things," Harvey said incredulous that his wife would not tell him that she was almost raped.

"I didn't want to call you after it happened because I was ashamed. I was ashamed I lied to you and I knew you wouldn't like it, so I thought if I just calmed down then I would go home and you would see that nothing had really happened and that I was fine. I am fine. You know I've handled plenty of men. I shook him off and threatened that I would press charges if he didn't leave me alone."

"You're my wife. I've always protected you, even when you were just my friend, and now is not an exception," Harvey walked over to her and pulled her into his arms and took her face in his hands.

"He didn't rape you, did he?"

Donna gave Harvey the incredulous look now. "No. I would have told you had that happened. I would never let that happen. I know how to defend myself physically. I didn't live in Brooklyn all those years and take public transportation without knowing how to defend myself, you know."

"Donna, I love you so much. I could never stand if anything happened to you," Harvey said boring his eyes into her and then he kissed her passionately. It was the first real kiss they had shared in two weeks.

Donna appreciated that his wall had come down but she still had questions of her own.

"Ok, my turn, Harvey. How the hell did you get that mark and do not tell me you don't remember."

Harvey released her and was not prepared to confess his own sin. He felt ashamed now of his behavior that Sunday after Thanksgiving. He was loathed to tell her, but he knew there would be no peace between them until he confessed.

"You're right, Donna. I do remember. As a matter of fact, the memory came back just today. Something I was working on triggered it."

"Ok, so, tell me," Donna insisted. Her position as his one and only was not really in danger she knew that. She was just pissed because instead of him taking the time with her to let her explain he had imagined this whole affair and let himself respond to an imagined betrayal. She had resumed her seat on the couch and patted the cushion next to her inviting her husband to join her. She was glad he was going to tell her what happened. Knowing Harvey he was probably trying to resume his womanizing ways to retaliate for her mistakenly thought behavior.

"I was really, really drunk when we got there. I was so drunk that Marcus drove both to and from. Anyway, I got in there and I wanted to forget I was a happily married man and revenge myself by sleeping with another woman. I smiled at this young woman who was probably young enough to be my daughter. I ignored Marcus and Mike's warning and waved my scotch at her. She got up from the table where she was sitting waiting for her turn on the stage, came over to me and sat on my lap. She was trying to make a few bucks by giving me my own private lap dance. Anyway, Marcus and Mike tried to get her off but I just held onto her, so she was encouraged and began nibbling my ear I suppose that's when she thought she had a customer and took more liberties with my neck. I swear Donna I had so much booze I didn't feel her sucking the hell out of my neck."

"You let this strange woman just touch you like that not even remembering that I should be all you need in the sex department, Harvey. Maybe I should go to this strip joint and beat up this bitch."

"Now who's protecting who?" Harvey asked smiling.

"I'm always protecting you whether you like it or not..."

"I know," Harvey said taking a last sip of his ginger ale.

"It's more than protecting you. You are mine now as much as I am yours and no one touches what is mine. You got it?"

"I know I loved you for some reason," Harvey said brushing Donna's red hair aside and kissing her neck.

Donna giggled because Harvey's touch there always gave her goosebumps.

"Harvey, look at me," Donna said seriously wanting him to understand the words she was ready to state.

"Harvey!"

"Ok, what is it?"

"I know how much it took for you to finally trust me enough to admit that you loved me and ask me to marry you. I would never betray that trust. If I ever wanted to stray I would be woman enough to let you know first and walk way before hurting you. Those stories of how your mother cheated on your father made me sick. I knew your dad and I loved him myself."

"He loved you, too. I thought he was going to marry you and knock me out of the running."

"Well...he just might have," Donna contemplated aloud teasing Harvey.

"Great. Now I know how you really feel. I'm second best."

"Sure. You'd like to think that to gain sympathy. Nice try, boy."

"Besides, and I know I mentioned this before, where in the hell would I get the time to have an affair? Again, I reiterate: I have been pregnant two out of the last three years which means I have two children under the age of 2. I work full time sometimes 10 hours a day and then spend the rest of my night with you. When am I out of your sight? Except when I go to lunch or beg for an hour for a pedicure? I know, honey, you weren't thinking with that fabulous lawyer's mind of yours but with your husband's heart; however, if you think logically, I think you would have had your answer."

Harvey eyed his wife and then took a last swig of the metal tasting ginger ale.

"So has Mr. Peach tried to contact you since Black Friday?" Harvey wondered.

"Yes, he has called me at least twice every day since then and I keep threatening that I am going to sue him for sexual assault. He knows you're a lawyer, but he doesn't believe I would really do it."

"You did know that Sergei Patronov is not his real name, then?"

" Yes, I did some research on the same day after I was with your mom and then I went shopping as you saw. It was therapy to calm me down before I had to go home and face you."

"And shopping you did, I don't think my credit card has had a hit like that since I married you."

"Well, at least most of the Christmas shopping is done."

Then Donna and Harvey laughed and looked at one another. It was a laugh of utter relief. The air had finally been cleared and they could go on with their life together.

They both looked up as Marcus came in the door.

"Mom, ok?" Harvey asked.

"Yes. I was just going to gather my stuff and go over to the hotel and see Kate and the kids. You guys ok?"

Donna and Harvey looked at one another and then just smiled.

"Yes, we are just fine."

Lillian rebounded from her tumor movement a little. A week later, she was taken off the critical list and moved back to her room where she could transport herself in a wheelchair. She had some light physical therapy to keep her leg muscles from atrophy, but her mind still wondered from reality to imaginary and from the present to the past. A few days later when Harvey was talking to her she had called him Gordon and started talking about a woman of whom Lillian had apparently been jealous as she was a singer with another band and that Gordon wanted to bring into his band or have on one of his albums as a guest singer. Harvey had never known any of this, so he was a tad surprised when his mother revealed that his father had not been perfect either. It seemed innocent enough because Harvey knew how much his father had loved his mother. That was why when the finale of his family life had happened Gordon had reacted so badly. Just when Harvey was going to try to answer his mother's question regarding the female singer, Lillian snapped back into the present and asked Harvey when he was going to talk with Donna about the events of Black Friday.

"We did talk, mom. We talked the night they took you over to the critical care unit."

Lillian nodded her head up and down and patted her son's shoulder.

"Good boy, Harvey. Donna loves you so much. She protects you so much. She came to me and blurted out what happened with that caterer because she knew that you probably thought she was having an affair. She wasn't. Did you know she was almost sexually assaulted?"

"Yes, mom, Donna told me. We're good. Now when was the last time Marcus came to see you?'

Lillian smiled. "He, Kate, and the kids came by yesterday. Marcus said he would be back in a couple of days but that he had to return to Boston to close a few things and make sure the kids didn't miss too much time before Christmas vacation."

"Well, I have a surprise for you."

"Really? Well, I'm not real good with surprises. They haven't ever been the best for me."

"I think you will change your mind once you see it."

Harvey went to the door of Lillian's room and whispered to Donna to come in.

Lillian's eyes lit up the minute she saw Donna, Amanda, and little Gordon in his coach.

"My grandbabies! Come here and give grandma a hug, Mandy," Lillian encouraged.

Mandy was not sure what to make of her grandmother in the wheelchair and looked up at her mom and tried to hide between Donna 's legs.

Donna came down to her level and said, "Go give Grandmom Lillian a hug. She loves you. You don't want her to think we don't love her back, right?"

Mandy shook her head so violently that her ponytail whipped back and forth.

"Ok. So give Grandma a hug. Daddy will take you," Donna said.

"Sure, sweetie. Take Daddy's hand," Harvey said and watched as Mandy clasped her father's hand in hers and he walked her over to Lillian.

"Harvey, can you sit her in my lap?"

"Are you sure?"

"I still have feeling from my hips to my thighs. It's just my knees to my feet where I have most of the paralysis. I'm sure she'll let me know if she's uncomfortable."

"Ok, but I will be right next you. Mandy can be squirmy," Harvey volunteered.

"Like you were," Lillian said with that mother's proud glint in her eye. "You were always too busy to stay in one place. Always ambitious from the time you were Mandy's age."

Harvey just shook his head and marveled that his mother had remembered details like that. _She did actually love me_ Harvey thought.

"Could I hold Gordon, too?"

"You're sure you can handle both? Gordon seems to be getting a little squirmy himself now that he's almost five months old," Donna said as she picked up the baby from his coach. He looked all around at the lights and focused on his mother's voice. Donna with motherly pride talked to her baby boy and said, "Grandma wants to hold you, little man. You be good. Don't spit up on her."

"Oh, don't worry about that," Lillian said. "I seem to be spitting up on myself more these days."

"Well, ok, let me put this cloth diaper on your blouse so if he does erupt you won't have to change. Mandy will help. She's a big help with her baby brother, aren't you, sweetie?" Donna asked Mandy who nodded.

"Ok, I want to take a picture of all of you. Get in there, Harvey," Donna urged as she lined up her cell phone with the family gathering.

"Donna you need to get in the picture, too. I'll go get some help from one of the caretakers. Hold on," Harvey said as he scooted out the door looking for a free person to take the snapshot.

"How about we go over to the tree? That way the picture will make a nice Christmas photo," Lillian said. "Perhaps, my last..." she stated quietly under her breath.

Donna hung her head out the door looking for Harvey. She spotted him coming down the hall with one of the service people, Thomas, Donna believed was his name. He had been there and helped her on the Black Friday when Donna had come on her own to see her mother-in-law.

"Hey, Thomas here has a couple of minutes and said he would be more than happy to snap a family picture on our phones," Harvey said happily.

"Harvey, your mom wants to take the picture near her little tree. Do you think we could move her over there?"

"Sure. We'll just move the kids and then move mom over there and put the kids back on her lap."

"Uh, Harvey. I think your mom is thinking this is going to be her last Christmas with us," Donna said quietly to Harvey before he stepped back into the room.

He nodded. "It well could be, honey. The doctor said any decline could be sudden and rapid. We just have to face that fact."

Donna lowered her head and then looked up into Harvey's deep brown eyes and smiled. "Ok. I just wanted you to be ready. That's all."

"I know. You just want me to be prepared as best I can because of how sudden my father's death was. I am somewhat prepared, but you know that no matter how prepared a person may be death is always a shock."

"Ok. I'm here for you. You know that."

"Of course you are. Now let's get this picture taken."


	18. Chapter 18 - Love and Victory

**Author's Note: Here is the last chapter. I hope you have enjoyed reading this as much as I have enjoyed writing it. I hope you don't think it** **too simple an ending. Please review! It keeps me going. Thank you - Love Carol**

Chapter 18

One week later on a bright December Saturday afternoon in St. Patrick's Cathedral in Manhattan, Michael James Ross and Rachel Elizabeth Zane were married. Their best friends Donna Roberta Paulsen Specter and Harvey Reginald Specter were their Matron-of-Honor and Best Man, respectively.

Rachel was dressed in a designer gown which bore colors of the rainbow on the bodice and through the ruching on the skirt of the mermaid style gown. The groom dressed in a black tux complimented her gown by wearing a teal blue bow tie, cummerbund, and pocket square. Accompanied by showers of birdseed and "against the rule" white rice, Mike and Rachel hurried into the limo on the way to the reception venue at the Plaza Hotel.

Donna, dressed in that teal gown in which straps had to be sown, had her husband's Best Man jacket thrown over her shoulders so she would not freeze in the December air as they waited for Ray to pick them up and take them to the venue. Their children were in the good hands of Donna's mom back home in West Chester. Harvey looked spectacular as always dressed in the identical black tux as Mike's only with a yellow tie, cummerbund, and pocket square. As they rushed into their seats in the back of the car that Ray was driving, he passed a note back to Harvey. It was from his mom's special nurse at the hospice.

 **Dear Mr. and Mrs. Specter:**

 **I tried to reach you earlier on your cell phones. I could not reach you, so I called your home and spoke with . She informed me that you were participating in a very special wedding today and would probably not be available all day. Your brother was also not available as he had to be back in Boston yesterday. I talked with him earlier to pass on this sad news. He wanted me to inform you that he will be in Manhattan tomorrow morning.**

 **I hate to inform you that your mother, Lillian Specter, died in her sleep during her late morning nap. She had been animated only moments before and wanted you to know that she was very proud of you and your brother and that the last few weeks of her life had been the happiest she had ever had. She had always loved you and wanted you to know that.**

 **Please come to the hospice tomorrow to pick up your mother's possessions and make funeral and burial arrangements.**

 **Thank you for the pleasure of serving your family. We are sorry to pass on this sad news.**

 **Sincerely**

 **Elizabeth Markham, R.N. M.S.N.**

Donna had read the letter silently as they rode to the reception. She looked at her husband who had turned away from looking at her because he did not want her to see his tears. He still found it ironic that all his life he had waited for his mother to drop dead and he thought he would not bat an eyelid. However, in the last four months, he would give all his money away just to see her cured so she could continue to watch her grandchildren grow up and Harvey to make up to her all the damage that had been done when her immediate family had been broken.

"Harvey?" Donna asked. She took her left hand and urged him gently to turn to look at her. She thumbed a tear away which happen to fall down his cheek. Then much to her surprise, Harvey buried himself in his wife's arms looking for solace and consolation from the bad news.

Donna just held him for a few minutes and then right before Ray signaled they were at the Plaza. Donna said, "We're here, Harvey. I could make excuses for us if you want to go home. I'm sure that Mike and Rachel would understand." She rubbed his back and then he rose from her embrace.

Wiping a hand under his nose and brushing away the fluid from his eyes, he took his proud stance and said, "No way, Mrs. Specter. You are not using this bad news to escape my dancing with you in my arms all evening. I wouldn't leave you to this crowd. You may not come back."

Donna laughed and then kissed Harvey. "I'll always be back. You know that."

As Ray handed her out of the car, Donna turned to watch as Harvey had put his jacket back on, buttoned it and looked around at the crowd standing around snapping pictures as he rose from the car. He took one look at heaven and blew a kiss upwards.

He said quietly so no one heard not even his wife, "That's for you mom and dad. Now you can both be together again...forever."

 **THE END OF THIS ADVENTURE.**


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